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Old 04-09-2012, 06:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
I hear what you're saying and agree with part of it. My oldest DD had a friend whose parents would not let her go anywhere that would cost more than in-state at the U of CO. She got accepted into a couple of good schools, including out-of-state at Penn State, which is quite difficult, but they wouldn't let her go there or any other school that would cost more. I frankly think that was a foolish decision, as I don't think these other schools would have cost *that* much more. Now this young woman did graduate in 4 years and got a good job and is going to grad school company-paid, so her story kind of diverges from your friend's kid.

However, re: the bold, all of that is specualtive, except the extra semester, and that might have happened at a private school as well. No one can offer you a job 4 years in advance of you earning your degree.
The job offer was pretty much a given. We knew the alum and talked to them about this girl (different field, not very common) and they were itching for her to go to said school but because she didn't, they took someone that did. In this particular case, zero speculation. When we found out what she intended to major in, we told her we would make that call on her behalf but warned her that they don't hire from outside of that school. It was her #1 choice-but her parents had other ideas.
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Old 04-09-2012, 06:49 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
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Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post
I'm watching last night's Parenthood (yes, I realize it is fictional ). SPOLIER ALERT Haddie gets into her dream school, Cornell. Her parents discuss the cost and urge her to keep her options open. Bottom line is they can't afford to send her. So, should they be able to just say "no", or should she still have the option of going if she's willing to take out loans to pay for it? Who gets to decide, and is a HS senior able to understand the burden of coming out of school with 10's of thousands in loans?
This is what we did with our daughters. The career they choose because it is their future and the college they choose also. We told them how we can help and if that meant they needed to get student loans, go for it.

Our middle daughter selected a university where she still had to get a student loan. The youngest decided to go to our local university and stay home with us. We arrange things so neither her nor us ended up paying for her education. She graduated last december with a Masters in Counseling. This month she gets married and I used some humer and told our future son-in-law "Here she is, debt free". Take care
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