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Actually, differences in our brians make women better at multi tasking. Women have millions more connections between the hemispheres of the brain. I've never read that there was any reason we'd be better at nurture other than how we're raised.
I think that our brains are constantly changing as they are exposed to different kind of stimuli. I very seriously doubt that homo sapiens' brains 50,000 years ago are exactly the same as today's homo sapiens! I don't think that we can say that women's brains are actually better at multitasking than men's: http://www.tinbergen.nl/discussionpapers/11044.pdfour results do not support
the stereotype that women are better at multitasking. Women suffer as much as men when forced
to multitask and are actually less inclined to multitask when being free to choose.
This seems to be nothing more than a myth.
I think so. In general
Women are better at multisaking. Men as focused tasks.
Women are more compassionate. When a baby cries, most women long to comfort the baby. Most men just want to shut it up. The biophysical reactions are different. Woemn feel campassion, men get annoyed.
Hurt knee, Mommy will make it better. Daddy will tell you buck up, that is nothing.
Men in general tend to be better discipliarians though. Women do not seem to be as consistent with discipline.
I know a couple stay at home dads in my neighborhood who love doing it, and are very good with their kids. I know more than one stay at home mom who said they couldn't stand it being home with little kids/babies and couldn't wait to get back to work. I'd say it just all depends on the particular parent's personality. Not every man or woman loves spending their entire day with little kids. (not that they don't love their own children, but some people truly love being surrounded by little children, and some don't - both men and women.)
I thought I'd like being a stay at home dad, and I did many days. But I also learned that it's a tougher job than going to work. Mainly, because you put in about a 14 hour day, and then work more on the weekends! I have twins, so that's even more work. It's very physically and mentally demanding, and then there's the isolation. I often felt "trapped" in my own home because it was so much work to leave home with twin babies/toddlers. I also had a feeling that I wasn't accomplishing anything, even though I know that raising children is an accomplishment. But I hear these same complaints from stay at home moms too. On top of that, your spouse comes home and thinks you were sitting around watching Ellen and Oprah with your feet up all afternoon and gets the idea that the kids are all "your" job, so there can end up being resentment.
I went back to work when they were 2.5 and it actually felt like a break. Now they're almost 4, and spend 7 hrs. a day in pre-school and are doing great.
I think everyone is equipped with what they are equipped with. It is what you DO with your equipment that translates into how well one does in anything, sahp included.
I think so. In general
Women are better at multisaking. Men as focused tasks.
Women are more compassionate. When a baby cries, most women long to comfort the baby. Most men just want to shut it up. The biophysical reactions are different. Woemn feel campassion, men get annoyed.
Hurt knee, Mommy will make it better. Daddy will tell you buck up, that is nothing.
Men in general tend to be better discipliarians though. Women do not seem to be as consistent with discipline.
Not universally true, but it is generally true.
I know you said it is not universally true, so I am not arguing but I laughed so hard when I read the bolded.
It is the complete opposite in my house. I am the one who will lok at DD and say "You're fine." and then walk away. Daddy is the one who runs to get the first aid kit and then holds her and rocks her and kisses the booboo.
I think this has to do with how we were raised though. DH had a mom who would panic over the smallest things. My mom would point us in the direction of the bandaids. Don't get me wrong. I have a very affectionate mom. She was just very laid back about minor injuries.
I am also definitely the disciplinarian in my house. DH can't punish our child for anything. She has him wrapped around her little finger and she already knows that if she wants to hear "yes", she just has to go to Daddy.
In general I think it all comes down to the individuals involved. I honestly don't think there is a universal "moms are better at it" kind of thing. I can say that I think dad's would most likely do things different than moms, but that doesn't make it worse or better.
I think a lot of times the decision as to whom will stay home ends up being a financial one. The parent that makes more money is going to work, while the one who makes less is going to stay home. In most cases, the man makes more so the decision is semi-made.
Looking at my own situation, I don't know if I could do what my wife does. She enjoys being home with the kids and while she has had moments over the past 4 years when she has "missed" having a job and being out of the house she enjoys the ability to stay at home and be with the kids. In all honesty, I don't think I could do it long term. I'm more than capable of watching the kids by myself for an extended time, but I also very much enjoy my career and being out of the house for work. If my wife made say double my salary, I don't know if I would quit my job to stay home.
I think part of the reason my wife is so good at it (outside of really wanting to do it) is that she is a great multi-tasker and is less uptight about things. When I watch the kids by myself I am always "on" and doing something. Of course it usually just ends up with me and the kids being burned out, lol. I think I'm a good parent and make the most of the time I do have with my kids, but I think I would actually be less of a parent if I stayed at home.
I think that our brains are constantly changing as they are exposed to different kind of stimuli. I very seriously doubt that homo sapiens' brains 50,000 years ago are exactly the same as today's homo sapiens! I don't think that we can say that women's brains are actually better at multitasking than men's: http://www.tinbergen.nl/discussionpapers/11044.pdfour results do not support the stereotype that women are better at multitasking. Women suffer as much as men when forced to multitask and are actually less inclined to multitask when being free to choose.
This seems to be nothing more than a myth.
Actually, we can. Women have hudreds of thousands (perhaps more, I don't remember the number but it is HUGE) more connections between the hemispheres of the brain. I don't recall why but this makes us better at multitasking. From an evolutionary standpoint, this makes perfect sense because women had to multi task because they provided child care on top of everything else (defaulted to women because they had the babies). For men, there was an evolutionary advantge for being able to concentrate on one thing at a time.
However, today, so much of the work has been removed from keeping home and hearth that it really doesn't matter anymore. It's not like the days when mom needed to be listening for the signs of a preditor while baking the bread and tending the children at the same time. I don't think there's a real advantage to being able to multi task at home these days but women win here hands down.
I have been a stay at home father for 3 years now. I am on disability etc so can't work but I am curious are there other fathers who would rather go back to work than stay at home? I would and within a year I will...It just seems to me my wife has more patience and understanding etc to be a stay at home parent...she doesn't mind giving the ENTIRE day to the kids always picking up after them etc...Is it just a motherly thing? Or do you have to learn to enjoy it and just do it bc it needs done.....I just get frustrated when trying to clean one part of house son is destroying another part I already cleaned....
No. Nobody effin' enjoys that. You just suck it up and do it.
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