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We will HELP in every way possible for our children to get an education. They will very likely have to work some and will definitely apply for scholarships and grants. But I do agree that every person is different. My 8Th grader is very academic and an over achiever. He's a High Honor student and he is excelling in Math and science so he will probably go in that direction. He's already looking forward to college. He LOVES school! My 6Th grader is also an Honor student and does very well, but he doesn't necessarily like school very much and he has already shown an interest in a trade profession. Which is fine as long as he chooses something that will make him happy and of course make a good living. I also have 3RD grader who is a born athlete but she's struggling in school a bit. So I'm kind of thinking Sports scholarship for her. My kindergartener..... well...he is reading at a 1ST grade level and does very well in math. So we are expecting great things from him. Also my husband and I are not college graduates and we are financially limited so my kids have grown up knowing that life is extremely tough when you don't get an education. They all go to public schools ( but they're good ones) and I'm on top of everything they are doing. I agree with setting a good foundation. School comes first. That's they're job right now. And my job is to help them be successful. I'm a stay at home mom, so that's why I say "my job" because I'm the one who is always THERE. My husband brings in the money and he has provided for us nicely but he doesn't really like what he does. He's a truck driver (local, thank God) and there's nothing wrong with that, but we want ,ofcourse, much better for our kids, and we want them to want that too. We are very proud of them and we pray ever day that God will help us stay healthy and strong and guide us to a bright future. Oh , and by the way I am taking some college classes while the kids are at school, Yay!
As others have said throughout this thread, will help as much as possible, to an extent, but the kids will be expected to work and study hard, to help earn their way through. My folks bent over backwards to scrape and help me, with a lot of appreciate by me, but by same token I worked to pay the bills during and then after via the student loans I had. I do believe that such builds character and gives a person more drive to actually complete, knowing that their resources are limited pushes 'em, having a goal and then getting it finished w/ what funds that they have in their kitty. However, with that said, the ability to go through college w/o worries of finances would be a relief!
If you tell your kid, from when they're little, that they need to go to college and constantly ingrain that into them - then you should pay for it!
Don't tell them for 18 years how important it is and make them feel that they have to if you aren't going to pay for it.
That is all.
It is very nice if a parent pays for their son or daughter to go to college, but there is no law that says u have to. Some parents may not have the money to pay or they may feel it is better for their son or daughter to pay their own way...it builds character. There are many people who work and put themselves through college. In my opinion a parent is not obligated to pay...nor is an adult entitled to a college education at their parent's expense.
Any achievement a child can make in reaching college/university is a great undertaking
If we inbred in them from the beginning of school days that college/university is their goal that needs and must be attained and why...
we need as parents to explain to them year after year - through progression of discussion of why grades are important from 1st on to get into college/university and to strive for a scholarship..but to let them know that it is expensive for higher education and that we are all here to save for them - through our own contributions, through their weekly allowance and when they become of age to work -- we have told our son as long as he strives for college, maintains excellent grades to pursue and apply for a scholarship, contributes (no matter how large or small) we will in fact MAKE it happen for him.
he is in Jr high now - knows everyday that his ultimate goal is to go to college/university - grades and test results are important -
he is a normal son - plays gaming, has a cell phone, does chores and saves his allowance -
but NOT going to college/university is not an option in our home......
actually my husband and I feel it is our obligation to our son - to entitle him to an educated chance at life.. to be able to supprt him and his family when we are gone...
If you tell your kid, from when they're little, that they need to go to college and constantly ingrain that into them - then you should pay for it!
Don't tell them for 18 years how important it is and make them feel that they have to if you aren't going to pay for it.
That is all.
Interesting theory there. Irregardless of if you pay for it or they do it's still important. A bachelor's degree is the new high school diploma. If you want them to be able to support themselves and not live in poverty they have to go to some sort of school post high school. Even if they don't want to go to college they will still need professional training in something...trade school, military, etc. So should parents that lack the ability to pay for college not encourage their children to do better than they did? How does that make any sense. It doesn't.
I grew up extremely poor and knew I wanted to go to college. I paid my own way and I think I appreciated it more because I earned it and I wanted it bad enough to pay for it. Not saying I won't help my children if I can...but they will most likely need to foot a large portion of the bill themselves. Yet I still feel it's important to tell them that college isn't a choice it's a life requirement.
You can tell your child all you want that they WILL go to college, but in the end, you can't force them to go if they don't want to.
My parents wanted me to go to college. I'm a reasonably intelligent person, and made good grades in school. However, I hated school, didn't know what I wanted to be when I grew up, and had no desire to go to college. It's a good thing, too - I probably would have majored in accounting, and I HATE accounting.
I never had a problem finding good jobs, getting promotions, or making a decent salary. My husband also never went to college. He makes six figures per year.
The bottom line is, I'm not a career-driven person. College was not right for me, and I've had a happy life.
Also, the posts about the need for tradespeople is spot-on. I read an article a year or so ago about how tradespeople are desperate to find skilled workers. You can make a good, honest living without going to college; it all depends on your chosen field.
I think if a parent can at least help out, bravo but a college education is YOUR key to a better future. It's not for your parents' benefit, it's for YOUR benefit. With that said, I'm sure along with engraving in your children's head to attend college, parents also tell their kids whether or not they can afford to pay for it - partial or full. I doubt any parent doesn't at least bring it up.
Being at least being partially responsible for your education will make you appreciate your education more. My parents for the most part paid for mine, and I took it for granted. I could've done better in school and I could've picked a more "useful" major but instead, I partied (though not totally my fault since I kinda grew up "repressed") and picked a uselss major. I still managed a 3.0 but now I'm back in school for a second degree (or a certificate in the area of accounting - I haven't decided yet) and this time around, I am definitely not taking anything for granted. Paying for it is coming out of my own pocket.
I'm not saying every kid in a similar situation as mine will turn out like me but I'm just sharing my "lesson learned".
Could one of the posters who is going the private route 1st through 12th explain their take on their preference to pay for that, and then let the children bear a substantial portion of college tuition?
My children started in a private school (K-3) and we're transitioning them to public, largely so that we can save $$$ for college. I've heard a mini-argument that its better to spend the money during primary and secondary, but I'm not sure I buy it.
I don't think college should be a parent-sponsored frat party culminating in an english major (don't look at me... But I also would hate to saddle my kids with huge amounts of debt straight out of school.
My parents aggressively saved in order to send my brother and I to college, and both of us are eternally grateful that we were able to focus completely on our studies without constantly having to worry about the cost.
ha! finish college in four years? Hardly anyone does that anymore, and that is mainly due to the necessity of having a job while in college. You would have to carry at least 18 credits a semester to graduate in 4 years, as well as take some summer sessions, which is not feasilble if also working. 5 years is pretty much the norm these days. It may be that the colleges intentionally set it up this way so they can squeeze an extra year of tuition out of people.
I finished my degree in four years, 1993-1997. So did my brother, 1996-2001. My parents paid for both of us to go to college, but it was made clear to us that they would ONLY pay for four years. Both of us had to take classes in summer at least once, but we managed it.
My cousin finished her B.S. in THREE years, 2003-2006, by going to school full-time year-round. It CAN be done.
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