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sounds to me like another adult that should have been steriliezed at birth. the kid has no hope of ever becoming anything due to incompetent home training.
My fourth-grade teacher was awesome. (Hi Mr. Good!) Learning was fun in his class, and he joked around a lot. I will never forget (and was talking about this to my husband just the other day) that one of our spelling words was "devious" and another kid's initials were DVS. When we were learning our spelling words, Mr. Good made a connection and said, "Devious ... DVS!" and pointed at him. Everybody, including this boy, thought it was hilarious and the name stuck. In high school everyone still called him Devious. He introduced himself as Devious to people. Sometimes I wonder what happened to him and whether people still call him Devious. He was the classic math nerd, extremely smart and also well liked because he had a good sense of humor and embraced his nerdiness. (He was Super Nerd for Halloween in junior high. Hysterical. You had to be there.) I believe some think tank somewhere must have Devious, pocket protector and all.
IN context, the Devious label was a funny joke from a popular teacher and a good memory.
OUT of context, this is a story about a bully teacher telling everyone that a social misfit is a sneaky liar. SCARRED FOR LIFE!
Context is important.
This is a cute story, and yes it's great that the kid had an accepting sense of humor and actually turned what could have been something that hurt his feelings into a title he wore proudly for the rest of his school years.
But, what if he didn't like it? What if only others had used that name on him throughout the rest of his school years and he hated it. I think his thoughts of that teacher would have been different. Do you think other kids would have continued calling him that if he hated it? Some would have enjoyed the fact that he hated it, that's when it's bullying.
A teacher called my daughter an airhead in class, said her brains matched her hair. She got decent grades she was just shy and had a hard time talking.
She didn't like it, but other students did and it stuck for awhile. They would yell out airhead every time she answered a question wrong, tripped over something, or when they wanted to make her upset. Finally some group of girls started pulling her hair from behind her in class, whispering airhead and idiot in her ear and kicking her chair, they had fun with this, they were a group enjoying it, she didn't.
She started going to the nurses office before that class saying she had a stomach ache. This was in Jr. high. Finally I learned what was going on from one of her friends. It doesn't always end well.
Maybe my daughter should of embraced it, called herself that and wore it proudly, but she didn't like it. Some kids don't always get a title they enjoy. When a teacher singles out a student it just allows other students to do the same. In your case they singled him out for a good reason, and you all still remember it to this day. In my daughters case she was singled out and it didn't turn out the same. I'm sure those girls remember her as well but not in the same way.
IDK, as a teacher I wouldn't go there, you never know how it will turn out, IMO. But, that's just me.
End of school year mean lots of awards in elementary classes and it is always fun to see how our teacher try to include every student and find something positive for everyone. this teacher should be severely reprimanded if not fired. how can a person without a clue about how humiliated this child would feel be allowed to continue? I don't think it was a joke at all. I think she meant to hurt her feelings and single her out to her peers.
The thing that I find most disturbing is the fact that an EIGHT YEAR OLD both has homework, and was enrolled in some kind of afterschool homework program. The whole situation is ridiculous.
End of school year mean lots of awards in elementary classes and it is always fun to see how our teacher try to include every student and find something positive for everyone. this teacher should be severely reprimanded if not fired. how can a person without a clue about how humiliated this child would feel be allowed to continue? I don't think it was a joke at all. I think she meant to hurt her feelings and single her out to her peers.
In elementary school we painted pumpkins (as opposed to carving). I didn't realize there would be rewards, but I got a ribbon for "Ugliest", while others got "Most Creative", "Most Colorful". I was so embarrassed I hid the ribbon in my backpack from my parents. Eventually they found it and I think I cried. Probably not the best thought out plan of my teacher. But life went on and my parents didn't throw a fit as much as I can remember. Still sucked though! I bet this girl will remember this and feel kind of crappy about it for awhile.
I agree, if we could all just blow those things off it would be great, but that is really unrealistic. I would expect a teacher to realize this.
I think the reason we should be careful is because we don't know how it will turn out and I don't think kids that find it hurtful are any less of a concern than kids that don't.
I don't think blaming them on top of it for not handling teasing well solves the issue. They might need help in dealing with it when they are little. I don't think kids that are hurt by sarcasm are something we should ignore or shrug off as sensitive.
Everyone is different. Some people can shrug things off, some can adopt a title and turn it around as a nickname they end up enjoying but some can't, it ends up badly.
Some times others just turn it into a word they can use to irritate another student for fun. As you've pointed out, it can last a long time. That's great if it's something they enjoy, not so great when it's not.
The difference to me is when it's a teacher instead of a student is handing out those titles the child can feel they have no recourse. They can't tell the teacher if it bothers them because it is the teacher.
Look at the reaction the girl in the article is receiving for saying she was hurt by this. Even adults are calling her a baby for being hurt by this and that it's deserved for her lack of homework.
We don't seem to set much of an example. I guess buck up and don't do something you can be teased about next time is what we should be teaching in class then. If that is really how we think, then we should let the kids in on it.
Maybe we can have training for this, an insult instruction of some sort. It's ok to be singled out if someone finds reason. It's ok to be teased if others think there is reason to do so.
But, nobody is perfect, this girl will be bound to do something again in the future that would give somebody cause to tease her. She might wear the wrong shoes in her peers eyes, or she might struggle with math in her teachers eyes. I guess she should just accept it as how life is and try not to worry about it but some have a harder time with this than others.
There is no way to avoid it. Some kids will be fat, some will be shy, some will have acne, some won't be good students, some will even fail to do their homework on time or have good attendance. Insulting these things because they are real with ditch awards doesn't make sense to me. I don't think it's a good message. There are better ways, IMO. But, being tough seems to be the way to go, we should be teaching that in school instead of teaching good behavior, it's a contradiction and things are hard enough when you are young.
What is this teacher going to say when a group of kids give a girl the "ugliest girl award" on the playground? Is she going to say that isn't a good thing to do? What if they say, well, it's true, all the kids think she is the ugliest. What is the difference in what the teacher did to the kids? Kid's this age might not see a difference.
sounds to me like another adult that should have been steriliezed at birth. the kid has no hope of ever becoming anything due to incompetent home training.
Could you elaborate on the kind of training you are talking about?
I'd react by being a parent and make sure my precious snowflake does their damn homework.
So as long as it's the truth then it's up to your kid to change it. What if it's because she has a zit face? What if the award is for lack of skin care? Would that be your fault for not taking her to the right dermatologist?
The mother was obviously at fault in your eyes, does that apply to everything? The right clothing? Absences, I mean if your child is ill more than others because of asthma or something, is it ok for them to get the slacker of attendance award and you'll make sure they don't miss next year, you'll send them sick?
This could apply to anything. Who would be the judge of what's appropriate with that attitude?
I think that attitude opens a door I wouldn't want opened to a child. Especially when other kids are involved. We have that problem now, bullying is a big deal and a lot of people are trying to curb it down right now. It can go too far.
Last edited by PoppySead; 05-31-2012 at 11:12 AM..
We're not talking about a teacher "joking around" with [students] in front of the class.....we're talking about ONE student...singled out....and rediculed in front of the class.....remember also, that this child is in elementary school.....it's not like we're dealing with higher grades where the students are now young adults more capable of dealing with such.
I know how old she is and that is why I made it a point to note that I was speaking about my own elementary school experience. There WERE times when the teachers would "single out" one of us to joke around with. Joking around happens and it really isn't a big deal.
Again, this isn't clear. What kind of social pressuring do you agree with. Specifically. Social pressure to do anything that isn't acceptable to others is good or is it only good in select areas, and what are those areas?
I don't understand the general meaning of social pressure. I was always taught not to give into social pressure, so I'm unclear what you mean.
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