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Bear in mind that tutus are not the best of everythign that she really needs. If you mean that to give her the best of everything is to BUY her things, then I suggest a change of priority. If you truly live in a ghetto where firearms are presented in public on even an occaissional basis, then you are living in a dangerous place. It would be worth considering the value in a long term plan that involves not living there. And necessarily that long term plan involves living more modestly than $80 dresses and $200 worth of plates and cups. By contrast, my husband and I both work. We make a darned good living. We don't spend $200 on the entire party. There is never enough money in the savings account or the Roth for higher education, or the retirement account...
She needs a mom who loves her. She needs a stable and safe place. She needs food, and care. She does not need tutus and plates.
Maybe you did not choose the best father. Who knows. That is water under the bridge. There is nothing that says despite that that the two of you can't have a fantastic life. But I would warrant that it is the better part of wisdom and maturity to increase the degree of frugality to your planning.
The best of everything does not always mean the most expensive of everything.
Many people can have the best of lives and not have the most expensive stuff.
she can make sure her daughter has the best party every but still do it for less.
The best of everything does not always mean the most expensive of everything.
Many people can have the best of lives and not have the most expensive stuff.
she can make sure her daughter has the best party every but still do it for less.
Your public library children's department will have books on planning children's parties, making inexpensive decorations, party games, birthday cake recipes (see cookbooks!), and more.
Whatever happened to the one-guest-per-birthday-child's-years rule? One year olds have one little guest (adults don't count), two year olds get two, etc.
Of course, if you're throwing a family picnic with a birthday party theme for your little one, the rules are out. The suggestions about inexpensive traditional picnic/outdoor party activities are great - just add a birthday cake and maybe a bunch of colorful balloons (safely tied down to avoid becoming airborne), a cute little pinafore style dress for the birthday babe, and you're all set. The older kids will remember those time-tested games and activities far longer than they will costly party favors. And skip the bounce house. They are everywhere. Traditional outdoor party games are not these days, so they become novelties.
One of the best birthday parties I remember attending during my own childhood involved a hayride, a cookout, and wading in a nearby (clean) creek on the birthday child's grandfather's farm. Loved it - great novelty to kids from the suburbs. A one year old is too young for this, of course, but then, a one year old isn't going to understand anything other than getting a bite of cake and maybe ice cream.
So - keep it simple, use your imagination and readily available resources, and have a wonderful time! Happy birthday to your little girl...
I have a son that is turning one is September as well and I'm a young mom too. Personally I would not spend that amount of money on my son's birthday. He is a baby, not only will he not remember it, but a big party at his age just isn't important . Me and my so actually have the funds to give my baby a GREAT birthday but would not right now because of how pointless it is. The most we are doing, is cake, friends, and family LOL. I know you want to give your daughter the best life possible(especially with your unfortunate circumstances) because I have a son too, and want to give him the BEST life possible as well. But spending that money on a birthday party isn't necessarily giving your child the best life, it's just throwing a party-one that will have NO literal impact on her life, being that she is still a baby. I think you're overcompensating. The fact that everything went badly with your bf, that you are a young single mom, that you have to work full time, go to school, and don't get spend much time with her it all leads you to do what a lot of parents(in similar situations do) compensate financially to make up for the "problems" or circumstances that they have placed themselves and their children in. So whether it's being overly cautious about every little thing(i.e. I've read some of your posts about how go "by the book" when parenting her, to the tea)or spending a ton of money on her first party, your essentially doing it because you are trying your best to make up for what you feel you aren't able to give her. And honestly I think that you are a GREAT mom from reading your posts about your daughter. You show great concern. You are parenting with caution. You already have a college fund. You have your OWN home as a single mom(even if it is in a bad neighborhood), your own job, your own car, etc. You are doing everything right in regard to all of those things. SO keep it up. BUT, like the others have said, it seems so much of a waste to spend money unnecessarily in your circumstances. IF I were in your situation I would be pinching pennies while she is young age, to save up for when she is older so that you can throw parties, and do things for her that she will be able to appreciate far more than what she will NOW as a baby.
Like I said before, I'm young mom as well, my pregnancy was definitely unexpected(though I was engaged when I found out I was pregnant) and while I didn't have the same experience as you with the "so"(mine was pretty supportive) my so is gone pretty much all the time due to his job. So essentially I'm doing it on my own, with help from my mom from time to time. So I know how hard it is. But the fact that you have come this far(a house at 21, your own job, your daughters saving account, etc) shows me that you are definitely ambitious and are on the right path. I think your priorities are fine(for the record) because I know your priority is to be a good mom. So just keep doing that.
And while I would def. rethink this type of party for a first birthday, I think you're on a good track, and just wanted to stop in and say that!
First Birthdays in our family are about family. My son's first was just the g parents, and us. My g daughter's was also just family-- lots of love--not lots of spending money. We spent a lot on presents for gdaughter, because we have it to spend. We didn't when my son was 1. Saving for the future is so very important--they really won't remember 1. If you have to have expensive banners, make them so that they can be reused. Retirement, and college--life events--marriage, death. They are the hallmarks of existance. Save Save,and help her develope, don't waste, on silly stuff.
Honestly I think spending a bunch of money on a 1st birthday party is a waste. The more you do, the more you risk freaking out your child. Let the kids play at the state park and that's that, in my opinion.
Totally agree with this. It's one of those things you want to, parents who have been there totally get it. But you'll look back and remember the cute things, like my son crying he was so tired and crawling through his first piece of cake.
Save your money, let the kids play in the park and have fun!
Clearly first year birthday parties are for the parents, not the kids, but I'd be wary about going too big for the party.The birthday child won't care, but a bigger factor is, I think, the very real risk that while the birthday kid will actually get even MORE scared and upset than he or she would be otherwise. With all the people and excitement already present, bringing in a bouncy house or an entertainer is just going to increase the odds that the baby is going to freak out. Not fun for the birthday kid, and definitely not fun for parents! Save yourself the money and the stress and just put out some bubbles or toys and let the kids just run/crawl around and be kids. They don't need anything more than that.
My neighborhood isnt bad. If anyone is familar with Columbus Ohio I live in Bexly which is a really good neighborhood I would say. But still Columbus as a whole isnt the safest place in the world and for that reason I arm myself to protect both me my child and my home. To get completely away I would have to leave Columbus which just isnt an option any time soon.
Bexley is a very affluent area in Columbus. Beautiful area with beautiful expensive homes, but it's surrounded by questionable areas that are pretty rough. We looked at some homes there when we were looking for a house. But we were not comfortable with the areas surrounding it - and the HIGH tax .
My baby will also turn 1 in September. I'm not sure if I even going to throw him a party. Our family are all out of town, and I just don't think my son will enjoy it. He's going through stranger anxiety phase right now. Yesterday we went to the in laws (we don't see them often), and every time somebody (that is not me or my husband) got close to him, he cried.
We're thinking of making a special trip somewhere just the 3 of us - the zoo, aquarium, or somewhere else. He loves people watching - as long as they don't get too close and say hi in his face.
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