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ok here is my situation...my oldest daughter moved back in with me (she's mid 30s) because where she lived she couldn't make ends meet. She's been living back at home for about a year. I'm starting to get real tired of it. I currently don't charge her any rent or utilities and have let her use my extra car the whole time so she can get her bills paid off etc etc but seems she is not making much money and isn't putting any dent into her finances. I want her to start to realize this is not an open ended situation (which I told him in the beginning). How much do you think its reasonable to charge her for rent/utilities/car usage ? thanks much
ok here is my situation...my oldest daughter moved back in with me (she's mid 30s) because where she lived she couldn't make ends meet. She's been living back at home for about a year. I'm starting to get real tired of it. I currently don't charge her any rent or utilities and have let her use my extra car the whole time so she can get her bills paid off etc etc but seems she is not making much money and isn't putting any dent into her finances. I want her to start to realize this is not an open ended situation (which I told him in the beginning). How much do you think its reasonable to charge her for rent/utilities/car usage ? thanks much
wow you need to give her an ultimatum on what she needs to do. you're too nice.
How much do you think its reasonable to charge her for rent/utilities/car usage ?
How much are you paying out of your pocket for these things?
Charge half that much for rent, if you are using the other half. It's fair and reasonable to do it that way. Having Internet strangers provide you with a number out of thin air is neither fair nor reasonable, IMO.
She's trying to find some guidance, some point of reference - because she's also trying to be fair. Any decent apartment would be $6-700/mo, so I'd start with half of that amount - call it $350. Is it just the two of you? If so, half the ultilities would be more than fair as well - that's water, electric. Half the food bill, as well. If she "can't afford that", then give her 60 days TO afford it, or get out. *NO* "partial rent", no "I'll catch up next payday - it's due when it's due.
Now...one VERY important thing to keep in mind......once she starts paying rent, she then has established landlord/tenant relationship...and rights. That means a legal eviction to make her move out. And I hate to say this, Mom, but given her track record, that's most likely where you're going to end up - so require a signed lease agreement, with very specific wording on when (and how much) rent and utilities are due, and allow NO leeway. You can get a lease agreement at almost any office supply store - make sure it's based on Texas law.
Speaking personally, as hard as it is, I think I'd just tell her it's time to move on - because you're actually hurting her more than helping - she's taking advantage of you, and will continue to do so no matter how much she might swear to you that she won't.
When I was 21 yrs. old used to charge me one week's wages per month to live at home, I kept the rest.
I have always thought that a reasonable charge for living at his house when I wasn't in college. Only then could I live there rent free.
In my home a lot would depend on what she's spending her money on. A child who is trying to save up and pay off debt is going to be given a huge break. Especially in this economy.
A child who is spending her money on going out and having a good time - not so much.
Regardless, I think you need to sit her down and have a discussion on your rules (if any) and how long you're willing to have her there.
In my home a lot would depend on what she's spending her money on. A child who is trying to save up and pay off debt is going to be given a huge break. Especially in this economy.
A child who is spending her money on going out and having a good time - not so much.
Regardless, I think you need to sit her down and have a discussion on your rules (if any) and how long you're willing to have her there.
This, pretty much. I wouldn't charge them a dime if they were saving and investing...and big screens or cars or frivolous waste are not part of the savings plan. A night or two out is okay, but not flopping in every night at 2am loaded. Helping with chores and picking up after themselves is more important than money and the golden rule is leave my TV remote alone.
My sister has a kid who is in his late 20s and moved back "home' (as in, CHILDHOOD home) when his wife kicked him out. My sister doesn't charge him any rent at all -- she says he's her kid so that's just the way it is.
Honestly, if I had a kid who was perfectly OK with living at home (and working a dead-end job) in his late 20s, I would give him an ultimatum about moving out and stick to it. Then again, I moved out of my parents' house at 18 and never went back. Maybe I am more independent than is good for me, but I prefer that over dependency.
To the OP, if it is just the two of you living at your house, charge her half of everything -- rent/mortgage, utilities, food. She needs a wake-up call!!
ok here is my situation...my oldest daughter moved back in with me (she's mid 30s) because where she lived she couldn't make ends meet. She's been living back at home for about a year. I'm starting to get real tired of it. I currently don't charge her any rent or utilities and have let her use my extra car the whole time so she can get her bills paid off etc etc but seems she is not making much money and isn't putting any dent into her finances. I want her to start to realize this is not an open ended situation (which I told him in the beginning). How much do you think its reasonable to charge her for rent/utilities/car usage ? thanks much
This should have been done day one. You've been coddling her and she's not going to like the change. My suggestion is you charge her enough that it makes her want to get her act together and move out but I think she'll balk at that now since you've not only given her a free ride, but a free car too...
First, I'd sell that extra car. Tell her you need the money because you can't afford to pay for a car for her and for the food she eats, the water she uses, etc, etc, etc... Then tell her she needs to pony up and pay her portion of the food bill and the untility bills. You have made it way too easy for her to be irresponsible. If someone offered me this deal, I wouldn't be too worried about sorting out my finances either. I'm not sure I'd make money off of her
Last edited by Ivorytickler; 08-15-2012 at 05:56 AM..
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My Old Man,
