Should Kids Be Forced to Call their step-fathers Dad? (step-dad, stepfather, divorced) - Parenting -Children, problems, school, daycare, behavior, age, teenagers, infants - City-Data Forum

chris123678 · 08-20-2012, 01:53 PM

I was just thinking.
Say if a woman gets married and has a child and then gets divorced and married again,
Should the child refer to the step-father as Dad?

One of my friends step-father is doing that.

So should they? Should the step father have any control over kids that aren't their own?

Magritte25 · 08-20-2012, 02:04 PM

It depends on the individual family in question. There is no one size fits all answer.

purehuman · 08-20-2012, 02:06 PM

Magritte25s right, and if the child is very young, and doesn't remember his "biological" father, why not?

OhioChic · 08-20-2012, 02:09 PM

If the child was really young and I was sure this guy would stay around and he was ok with it I would let my DD.

Now if she was older and I was married im not going to force it let it come naturally.

Hedgehog_Mom · 08-20-2012, 02:12 PM

It really should be up to the child.

My husband had to call his stepmother Mom and he really resented it. His dad also made him tell the stepmom that he loved her.

Pitt Chick · 08-20-2012, 02:24 PM

FORCED to?
No.

AnnaNomus · 08-20-2012, 02:34 PM

Depends. Sometimes a "step" father is nothing more than the mother's husband, not a father in any way, especially if the child's real father is still involved. Sometimes, he's something more. I don't think a child should ever be forced to call a stepfather dad though. If he fufills the role, it should come naturally.

Momma_bear · 08-20-2012, 03:06 PM

I think that each family is different. Some kids want to call their step parents mom and dad. Others do not. I don't think kids should be forced to call a stepfather dad but I don't think it is necessarily wrong. Each family is different and will handle this issue differently.

almost3am · 08-20-2012, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pitt Chick

FORCED to?
No.

At gunpoint no less. Seriously though, I say for babies you can bring them up calling the step-dad dad, but for others it is a little tough.

kevxu · 08-20-2012, 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chris123678

I was just thinking.
Say if a woman gets married and has a child and then gets divorced and married again,
Should the child refer to the step-father as Dad?

One of my friends step-father is doing that.

So should they? Should the step father have any control over kids that aren't their own?

I think what the kids call their stepfather can't be answered with a hard and fast rule. It will, of course, depend upon what their biological father's role in their lives is for one thing.

As for should a stepfather have any control over the kids - of course! He is the male head of the household and he most certainly have some say over their conduct...otherwise, he's hardly more than the mother's guest.