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Old 09-06-2012, 10:21 AM
 
Location: Beautiful Niagara Falls ON.
10,024 posts, read 10,701,248 times
Reputation: 8913

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My youngest daughter NEVER went to sleep on her own. She just could not sleep. So, she slept with my wife and I for her entire childhood. When she was grown up she had a house about 100 ft from my ex wife's place. Every night in the middle of the night she would go over to her mom's place and get into bed with her. Now she is married and sleeps with her husband and two kids.

When she was around 18 years old she discovered through a sleep disorded clinic that she never enters into REM sleep and therefore has huge trouble staying asleep. I'm very happy we didn't make a big issue of it when she was a child.
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Old 09-06-2012, 10:37 AM
 
2,382 posts, read 4,565,139 times
Reputation: 3430
Quote:
Originally Posted by eastwesteastagain View Post
I don't understand either, as that type of discipline is going to up the emotional dysregulation at a time when one is trying to get the child calm enough to sleep.
No doubt. I'm not a great sleeper myself... I suffer from insomnia and have become very aware of things that prevent restful sleep. Getting upset is never helpful.....I had to tell my husband that I was not ging to watch tv int he evenings if he insisted on watching things that I found upsetting (WWII shows on the history channel, evening news, real crme tv...)
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Old 09-06-2012, 10:58 AM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
3,388 posts, read 3,366,487 times
Reputation: 2396
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bakeneko View Post
No doubt. I'm not a great sleeper myself... I suffer from insomnia and have become very aware of things that prevent restful sleep. Getting upset is never helpful.....I had to tell my husband that I was not ging to watch tv int he evenings if he insisted on watching things that I found upsetting (WWII shows on the history channel, evening news, real crme tv...)
Oh, I'm right there with you. My sleep architecture is really messy (and part of that is heritable, so guess who has kids with some sleep challenges? ). I totally agree that getting upset just exacerbates the problem. It's funny because I used to do behavioral sleep training with adults who suffer from sleep disturbances as part of my job. As I'm sure you have experienced, there are an amazing amount of variables that can influence sleep and it can take a lot of consistent work to "fix" and just one day of inconsistency before one needs to start the process all over again. I have a lot of sympathy for parents struggling with their children's sleep and definitely recommend systematic intervention, but in some cases one can do everything "right" and still face challenges.
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Old 09-16-2012, 10:32 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,733,836 times
Reputation: 4150
Quote:
Originally Posted by WesternPilgrim View Post
It makes for happy children and happy parents. The best part about spanking: the unpleasantness is over very quickly.
Good point. ITA.
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Old 09-17-2012, 06:23 PM
 
47,573 posts, read 61,199,272 times
Reputation: 22297
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
This!

A tired child will sleep. Nature takes over. But the parent needs to find out the reason the child isn't sleeping. (The child is popping out of bed because he still has energy and he's used to the comfort of being with someone else.) The trick is to find what will make the child feel secure, safe and loved when he's snuggled into his own bed.
Exactly.

A whole lot of kids aren't getting much physical activity through out the day. They aren't playing outside in the fresh air for hours, they aren't getting their physical energy out. Plus if they've had any sugar or sugary foods, they're going to have too much artificial energy.

I know I can not fall asleep just by laying down if I'm not tired. I wouldn't expect a child can either.
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Old 09-18-2012, 10:51 AM
 
2,382 posts, read 4,565,139 times
Reputation: 3430
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
Exactly.

A whole lot of kids aren't getting much physical activity through out the day. They aren't playing outside in the fresh air for hours, they aren't getting their physical energy out. Plus if they've had any sugar or sugary foods, they're going to have too much artificial energy.

I know I can not fall asleep just by laying down if I'm not tired. I wouldn't expect a child can either.
I agree - if I take BabyGirl to the beach and she spends a couple hours building sandcastles (lugging her little bucket of sand and water around), or she spends a day running around the zoo or a good hour at the tot lot after dinner - bedtime goes much smoother...
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Old Today, 11:08 PM
 
9 posts
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by Missingatlanta View Post
My daughter is 21 months old and will not go to sleep unless we rock her to sleep. I know this is our fault but now we really want to break her of this habit.

We tried cry it out method and she just will not fall asleep. She even threw up from crying one time, so we are back to rocking her to sleep which can take from 1 to 2 hours every night because as soon as she hits the crib she wakes right back up. We will rock her for about 30 minutes and try to put her down but she wakes right up so we spend the next hour or so trying to get her into a deep sleep. I'm afraid that we are setting her up for lifelong sleep problems.

We have a solid night time routine where we feed her, bathe her, give her a cup or bottle of milk, then read 3-4 books before trying to put her to bed by the time she is asleep its usually 11pm.

Any advice???



About 3 months ago I was struggling to get my baby to sleep and after many visits to the doctor,
sleepless nights and countless hours spent online looking for something for my child but nothing
worked.

I called and spoke to numerous daycare centers and child care places to see if anyone knew
what could help my child. It was really hurting me watching my baby go through this ordeal night
after night not being able to sleep feeling helpless and unable to help at the same time.

It was by chance one day that I was in a chemist looking up some medications and speaking to
the lady behind the counter and she told me about a product that her daughter had been using
on her grand daughter and she told me to give her my contact and she would email it to me.

The product was a life saver; within a few days my child was back to normal and sleeping again
soundly and it was cheaper than everything else I tried.

Here is the product : [url]http://bit.ly/2mF67PJ[/url]

I am a huge advocate of this product and have told all my family and friends about this product
and some of my girl friends have started using it and also swear by it. I honestly canít thank that
lady enough for what she has done for my child especially. I am sharing this in the hope that it also help someone one day!
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Old Today, 11:11 PM
 
9 posts
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorthy View Post
I just wanted to provide some reassurance that you are not setting her up for a lifetime of sleep problems because you still rock her to sleep. I nursed my oldest daughter to sleep until she was 3 years old and I co-slept with her until she was 5. I was told by many that she would never learn to fall asleep on her own but she proved all of the naysayers wrong.

Maybe you could switch from rocking her to just laying next to her as she falls asleep and then gradually increase separation as time goes on. Good luck.
About 3 months ago I was struggling to get my baby to sleep and after many visits to the doctor,
sleepless nights and countless hours spent online looking for something for my child but nothing
worked.

I called and spoke to numerous daycare centers and child care places to see if anyone knew
what could help my child. It was really hurting me watching my baby go through this ordeal night
after night not being able to sleep feeling helpless and unable to help at the same time.

It was by chance one day that I was in a chemist looking up some medications and speaking to
the lady behind the counter and she told me about a product that her daughter had been using
on her grand daughter and she told me to give her my contact and she would email it to me.

The product was a life saver; within a few days my child was back to normal and sleeping again
soundly and it was cheaper than everything else I tried.

Here is the product : [url]http://bit.ly/2mF67PJ[/url]

I am a huge advocate of this product and have told all my family and friends about this product
and some of my girl friends have started using it and also swear by it. I honestly canít thank that
lady enough for what she has done for my child especially. I am sharing this in the hope that it also help someone one day!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old Today, 11:14 PM
 
9 posts
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by ADVentive View Post
I agree completely with Dorthy that you are not setting her up for a lifetime of sleep problems. I also nursed mine to sleep for as long as they would let me. Then I rocked, or sang, or layed down next to them until they fell asleep for a good while more. And now, at ages 3 and 6, they are able to go to sleep on their own just fine. Based on my experience, I would also recommend laying down with her to go to sleep, and then sneaking away once she is sleeping. That way there is no transfer to wake her (and, importantly for my kids, no change in temperature).



About 3 months ago I was struggling to get my baby to sleep and after many visits to the doctor,
sleepless nights and countless hours spent online looking for something for my child but nothing
worked.

I called and spoke to numerous daycare centers and child care places to see if anyone knew
what could help my child. It was really hurting me watching my baby go through this ordeal night
after night not being able to sleep feeling helpless and unable to help at the same time.

It was by chance one day that I was in a chemist looking up some medications and speaking to
the lady behind the counter and she told me about a product that her daughter had been using
on her grand daughter and she told me to give her my contact and she would email it to me.

The product was a life saver; within a few days my child was back to normal and sleeping again
soundly and it was cheaper than everything else I tried.

Here is the product : [url]http://bit.ly/2mF67PJ[/url]

I am a huge advocate of this product and have told all my family and friends about this product
and some of my girl friends have started using it and also swear by it. I honestly canít thank that
lady enough for what she has done for my child especially. I am sharing this in the hope that it also help someone one day!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old Today, 11:16 PM
 
9 posts
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by WesternPilgrim View Post
Well, a couple of things. 21 months is pretty young. I suggest continuing to hold her when she wants to go to sleep. It's the evening, right, so you can read a book or something, or read to her. And then maybe think about putting her in your bed. Co-sleeping is fine until four or five years old.

Hopefully you started training the child in obedience from 8 months forward, so that if you tell her not to pick something up, she obeys, or if you tell her to come to you, she comes. Easy stuff. By 21 months she has respect for your voice and your commands even if she's not always perfectly compliant. If that is indeed the case, here's a suggestion ...

I'll tell you what has worked for us before we started co-sleeping.

Day 1-2: This should be dad's job. Put the child in her bed, and have dad pull up a chair by the bed. The girl will cry, but dad can gently place his hand on her from his chair and tell her to lay down. He can keep talking to her while she lays there, saying anything at all, or even singing. If she gets up, he immediately puts her back down. If she gets up again, she gets spanked (not in anger, and just enough to sting a little) and put down again. Repeat as needed until she goes to sleep.

Day 3-4: Dad moves the chair away from the bed, and doesn't touch the child, but otherwise does everything else noted above. Perhaps he doesn't talk to her as much.

Day 5-6: Dad moves the chair outside the bedroom door, but leaves the door open a crack.

This can take a week or longer, but in two weeks she should be going to sleep in her own bed. Modify the plan as needed, but that's the idea.

Good luck!



About 3 months ago I was struggling to get my baby to sleep and after many visits to the doctor,
sleepless nights and countless hours spent online looking for something for my child but nothing
worked.

I called and spoke to numerous daycare centers and child care places to see if anyone knew
what could help my child. It was really hurting me watching my baby go through this ordeal night
after night not being able to sleep feeling helpless and unable to help at the same time.

It was by chance one day that I was in a chemist looking up some medications and speaking to
the lady behind the counter and she told me about a product that her daughter had been using
on her grand daughter and she told me to give her my contact and she would email it to me.

The product was a life saver; within a few days my child was back to normal and sleeping again
soundly and it was cheaper than everything else I tried.

Here is the product : [url]http://bit.ly/2mF67PJ[/url]

I am a huge advocate of this product and have told all my family and friends about this product
and some of my girl friends have started using it and also swear by it. I honestly canít thank that
lady enough for what she has done for my child especially. I am sharing this in the hope that it also help someone one day!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
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