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Old 09-11-2012, 06:14 PM
 
948 posts, read 3,345,668 times
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I live in an urban community and there are a lot of tear downs with new, big houses going up. Most of those big houses are bought by families in this area. At the other end of my long street, which is very long and broken by a large street that intersects (so it's not very near me or my kids) there is a registered sex offender. The details say he had possession of child pornography.

I do these sex offender registry checks every few months as a mother and started doing them a decade ago as we moved around a lot and the info was useful. So, ff to the dilemma...the latest tear down is right next to the sex offender. The tear down property was bought by a large builder in the area so my fear is that a family may likely be looking at the new house once it's on the market.

I feel so compelled to do something and cannot just turn my back saying it's not my business. Can you imagine buying a home for your new family to later find out you live next to a pedophile? I was thinking that once the home is build I could have a dialogue with the realtor so they are well aware of the man and then put the onus on them for full disclosure. Does anyone else have another angle for me to consider in order to help keep a family from moving there--or at least warning them beforehand? Thanks.

 
Old 09-11-2012, 08:05 PM
 
936 posts, read 2,053,636 times
Reputation: 2253
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skatergirl View Post
I live in an urban community and there are a lot of tear downs with new, big houses going up. Most of those big houses are bought by families in this area. At the other end of my long street, which is very long and broken by a large street that intersects (so it's not very near me or my kids) there is a registered sex offender. The details say he had possession of child pornography.

I do these sex offender registry checks every few months as a mother and started doing them a decade ago as we moved around a lot and the info was useful. So, ff to the dilemma...the latest tear down is right next to the sex offender. The tear down property was bought by a large builder in the area so my fear is that a family may likely be looking at the new house once it's on the market.

I feel so compelled to do something and cannot just turn my back saying it's not my business. Can you imagine buying a home for your new family to later find out you live next to a pedophile? I was thinking that once the home is build I could have a dialogue with the realtor so they are well aware of the man and then put the onus on them for full disclosure. Does anyone else have another angle for me to consider in order to help keep a family from moving there--or at least warning them beforehand? Thanks.
There are several problems here.

Are realtors required to notify potential buyers about sex offenders in the area? Is it the realtor's responsibility, or the buyers' responsibility to research these things themselves?

How do you plan on enforcing your having "put the onus on them for full disclosure"? I mean, OK, you tell the realtor. Then you go home. The realtor has no incentive to tell a buyer, absent a legal requirement to do so, since it would probably cost them the sale. And what if the realtor doesn't tell the buyer? What will you do then?

What if a family wants to buy the house, and is willing to assume the risk of having a sex offender down the street or next door? Are you going to confront them about their decision? If they then decide to not buy the house, you might be liable for interference of contract--IANAL, but jurisdictions vary, and your particular place may make your activism actionable.

If it's so terrible to have a sex offender in the area, why are you and your family still living there?

Last edited by JustJulia; 09-12-2012 at 12:12 PM..
 
Old 09-11-2012, 08:15 PM
 
948 posts, read 3,345,668 times
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I only found out that about his arrest while we were living here.

Last edited by JustJulia; 09-12-2012 at 12:13 PM.. Reason: removed reference to deleted comment
 
Old 09-11-2012, 08:36 PM
 
676 posts, read 1,256,842 times
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I don't have kids myself, but most of the parents I know are pretty savvy to offender registries and check them when moving, etc. So they'll probably have done a check before the move in. I check the offender registry myself when I moved. It's no guarantee because someone can move into the neighborhood after you buy.
 
Old 09-12-2012, 08:12 AM
 
936 posts, read 2,053,636 times
Reputation: 2253
If I were a parent looking at that house, and you came up to me saying how you and your kids live on the street, but that my family shouldn't move in because there's a sex offender living nearby, I would have to ask you, "Well, if the guy's so dangerous, why are you still living here? Why are you really telling me this?" And that reaction is, by definition, suspicion.

I get that you mean to help people by warning them about this sex offender. But do you see how your taking this upon yourself can make you look like a busybody neighbor inserting herself in another family's business? And do you see how a realtor may see your actions as taking their paycheck out of their pocket?

Look, posting is the equivalent of walking into a large room of random strangers and throwing out your question to everyone there, prefaced or not. If you don't like the answers you get, that's your problem.

You asked a room full of complete strangers to show you a "different angle for [you] to consider". And the angle I'm putting for your consideration is this: warning the realtor may have no effect at all, because you have no way to make certain that the realtor warn prospective buyers. And warning buyers directly, however well meant, may make you seem like a busybody at the least, and might possibly lead to a realtor's suing you at the outside.

Last edited by JustJulia; 09-12-2012 at 12:14 PM.. Reason: removed reference to deleted comment
 
Old 09-12-2012, 09:26 AM
 
18,935 posts, read 11,526,287 times
Reputation: 69883
It makes sense to do as you did and solicit a variety of opinions about how to act/not act in such a highly charged situation. I think RockJock raises a number of valuable points that you might not have considered - some of which could have legal or other implications for you if you take certain actions. You have to ask yourself how far you're willing to go to help someone else - and if what you're doing is even helping or hurting anyone. There are actions you could take that might put your mind at ease that you did something, but that would have no effect whatsoever on any outcome. It's possible that there are actions you could take that would violate someone's civil liberties - and/or put you in the middle of a legal or other kind of retaliatory mess. You might not appreciate how Rock made his/her points but they're practical considerations.

Last edited by JustJulia; 09-12-2012 at 12:14 PM.. Reason: removed reference to deleted comment
 
Old 09-12-2012, 12:11 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,554,680 times
Reputation: 42767
This thread is not about psychology. I am moving it to Parenting , because Psychology does not have its own moderator to decide. In any case, parents and non-parents are allowed to post in everybody's threads here.

Last edited by JustJulia; 09-12-2012 at 12:54 PM..
 
Old 09-12-2012, 12:19 PM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
3,388 posts, read 3,891,908 times
Reputation: 2410
Forgive me if I am incorrect, but I believe the onus is on the potential buyers to go into the purchase having done their due diligence (i.e., checking the sex offender registry themselves). I think it is laudable that you want to protect families from the neighbor, but I don't know that talking to the realtor will actually accomplish anything.
 
Old 09-12-2012, 12:20 PM
 
4,761 posts, read 14,219,792 times
Reputation: 7955
The term "sex offender" in my area can mean MANY different things. I think it could include an 18 year old boy who was dating a girl under the age of 18 and that may have been a one time thing?

And TV tends to sensationalize things of this nature. To the point people are afraid to walk out the door!

Anyway I would find out specifically what this person did. I can imagine the offenses can range from "not a problem" to "lock your doors and keep an eye on the kids at all times".

The following says a "sex offender" can include someone sending obscene text messages or a second prostitution conviction!
(I imagine many high school kids in my area would be guilty of the first of those offences.)
Sex offender - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
 
Old 09-12-2012, 12:27 PM
 
4,761 posts, read 14,219,792 times
Reputation: 7955
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
This thread is not about psychology...
I think it is about psychology - How people watch TV and get to where they think extreme danger may exist when it reality there may be little or no danger.

But "people" do this to themselves. I just read a book written by a couple of reporters. They said that news stories which are sensationalized are what sells and gets the ratings. People *want* to watch this stuff!

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