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Again a baseless comment. Having worked in the biz yeah some don't, but many people go way beyond what you did. I repeat it's ridiculous to judge, people end up doing what works for them and the baby, everyones journey is a little different.
That's fine. I have my opinion, you have yours. They dont have to line up. But, I fail to see your point about going "beyond" what I did, other than donor milk, how else would they?
I exhausted all options before using supplemental formula including taking medication that was making me severely depressed. I highly doubt most other people would bother to do that to ensure their child was getting the best milk possible. Let me highlight the MOST part there.
Ah....YOU exhausted "all options" but you highly doubt that about others. Cue the parenting halo...Either way....why the judgement? You have absolutely no idea what other people's situations are. NONE. Whether they tried "enough" to be above being judged or not. So how about this - you fed your child however best worked for you, your child and your family. Why not assume that MOST people do the same - regardless of how that decision was reached and whether it passes your "good parent" sniff test?
Ah....YOU exhausted "all options" but you highly doubt that about others. Cue the parenting halo...Either way....why the judgement? You have absolutely no idea what other people's situations are. NONE. Whether they tried "enough" to be above being judged or not. So how about this - you fed your child however best worked for you, your child and your family. Why not assume that MOST people do the same - regardless of how that decision was reached and whether it passes your "good parent" sniff test?
Let me repeat what I said earlier:
I personally dont care if (general) you use formula, but dont try to say its not the easy option, because it is.
I honestly believe that in some cases, women choose to profile and proclaim their breastfeeding as a way of shouting "Look at me! I AM a BETTER mother than you'll ever be!" It may be partly to do what's best for the child, but it also may be partly to get attention, to put down other mothers, and to feel "superior."
I don't find it strange to bf an older child, but see no need to do it in public. If it's done mainly for comfort and bonding, and not nutrition, then it would be unnecessary to do it at a restaurant or while shopping like you would an infant. Also, by the time a child is 4, definitely by 5-6, he or she would be more aware socially, and ready to be more independent of mom. I don't know a single preschooler who would be caught dead nursing in front of other children. Most don't even want to sit on their mom's lap with other kids around. They want to play, interact, socialize, which is all just as important as "bonding" with mom, especially when the kid should have plenty of bonding time alone with mom.
I don't usually get involved in these threads, because it just becomes one big pissing contest. People should just do what is best for themselves and their families, not worry about what other people think, and not worry about what other people are doing. While personally I wouldn't nurse a toddler, I don't have a problem with anyone who does. And while I did breastfeed, I am not going to sit in judgment on those who chose not to, whether it was by choice or circumstances. It really doesn't make me a superior person because I did it and someone else didn't, as long as neither one of our kids starved to death.
Why potty train them? Why put them in preschool? Why teach them to sleep in their own bed? Why teach them how to dress themselves or bathe themselves?
Yah, it's a pain to do all of that stuff, too. But we do it because we know that they have to learn self reliance some day...
And they do. Do you stop hugging them once they start preschool? My kids could get their own drinks in plastic cups long before they were weaned. Why would nursing stop them being self reliant? Hell, even my husband needs a hug some days, and he can dress, bathe and feed himself.
Breastfeeding toddlers between the ages of one and three have been found to have fewer illnesses, illnesses of shorter duration, and lower mortality rates.
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Antibodies are abundant in human milk throughout lactation.
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The American Academy of Pediatrics: Increased duration of breastfeeding confers significant health and developmental benefits for the child and the mother… There is no upper limit to the duration of breastfeeding and no evidence of psychologic or developmental harm from breastfeeding into the third year of life or longer.”
This quote pretty much sums up why many mothers would choose to breastfeed a toddler or older child.
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Breastfeeding is a warm and loving way to meet the needs of toddlers and young children. It not only perks them up and energizes them; it also soothes the frustrations, bumps and bruises, and daily stresses of early childhood. In addition, nursing past infancy helps little ones make a gradual transition to childhood. Meeting a child’s dependency needs is the key to helping that child achieve independence. And children outgrow these needs according to their own unique timetable.”
I honestly believe that in some cases, women choose to profile and proclaim their breastfeeding as a way of shouting "Look at me! I AM a BETTER mother than you'll ever be!" It may be partly to do what's best for the child, but it also may be partly to get attention, to put down other mothers, and to feel "superior."
This is SO TRUE. Not all BF-ing moms are like this but when I was BFing my daughter, I was in a hot mess. My daughter was always cranky, didn't sleep like newborns are supposed to sleep, and witching hour felt like it was forever every-single-night. I went on KellyMom for BF-ing advice and I got so much judgement from some of the moms there. I couldn't decide if I wanted to supplement or not. I got bashed for even considering supplementing with formula. I finally broke down and did it b'c I just couldn't have my daughter nursing for an hour, have an hour break, and want to nurse again. Yes, she would nurse for an entire hour. Anyhow, I just couldn't handle it anymore but after I started supplementing, it was like night and day. I must not have had enough milk or something. Still had witching hour but that went away after 2 months, thankfully. Point is, I had never felt so much judgement in my life. It was very disheartening for me.
Loved your post. Really good points but this topic especially got my brain boiling!
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