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Old 10-25-2007, 11:24 AM
Location: SF Bay Area
1,397 posts, read 2,332,766 times
Reputation: 1729


Iím very happy, single, and chose to be a mom (via donor insemination). My twins are now 13 years old . Being a single mom by choice is certainly doable HOWEVER you need financial stability and a strong support network. I feel so blessed to have my children. And, yes, it is hard work sometimes.

My advice: think hard about how you would handle a difficult pregnancy which required bed rest, how long you would want to be off with the baby before returning to work (and how you can make it work out, financially), how would you handle sick child days (if you have only x number of days available to be off from work), look long and hard at the costs of raising a child (babies are expensive, daycare is expensive, school age kids wearing braces is expensive, extracurricular activities can be expensive (i.e. swim club, competitive dance or gymnastics) are expensive). And make sure you have medical insurance!!!

Keep in mind that babies grow into toddlers who grow into school age kids who turn into preteens and teens! Think about: do you want to parent a child or do you want a baby (infant stage) without thinking of the long term?

You might want to join Single Mothers by Choice, a national organization led by Jane Mattes for SMCís who are at every stage. They have about a dozen different e-groups for women at every stage - thinkers, tryers, infertility, mothers, momís of school age kids, momís of teens, adoption, and more) Ė join all or just those that apply for now They also have local chapters (maybe one in your area where SMCís get together. Here is a link to her website Single Mothers by Choice

Good luck in your thinking stage .
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