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However, I fail to realize why daughter #2 is getting a check at all. The father should not be retiring if he can't afford the "running costs" of a minor child.
The OP actually said they were planning on saving the money for college.
The OP actually said they were planning on saving the money for college.
It's actually a good point, though. With people in general complaining about all the entitlements being handed out and how taxpayers shouldn't have to foot the bill, if they CAN afford to house, clothe and feed their daughter without a government handout, maybe the "fair" thing to do would be to send the check back to the government, and do what most parents do on their own - pay for college themselves.
It's actually a good point, though. With people in general complaining about all the entitlements being handed out and how taxpayers shouldn't have to foot the bill, if they CAN afford to house, clothe and feed their daughter without a government handout, maybe the "fair" thing to do would be to send the check back to the government, and do what most parents do on their own - pay for college themselves.
I think any middle class parent would be crazy to turn down money that their child could have for college. The OP didn't make the law that made her child eligible for the money.
I think any middle class parent would be crazy to turn down money that their child could have for college. The OP didn't make the law that made her child eligible for the money.
I'm only approaching the whole idea of "fairness." I've seen many, MANY times on here where people will berate a poster who used government funding for things other than the intended purpose. Seems like the OP doesn't need the money to support her child in the way it was intended for, so maybe a different view of fairness was in order.
Either way, dishing it out to only one child is certainly not fair, and if the money is NOT being used for the intended purpose, I wonder what the OP has against her eldest daughter when it comes to not allocating EQUAL amounts of money for both of her kids. Sounds a bit like favoritism to me.
My parents believe that my younger sibbling is smarter and more talented than I am (although they do not actually say it directly) and encouraged him to keep secrets from me, and I can assure you that it has permanently hurt my relationship with both my parents and my brother and damaged my self-esteem. Please don't do that to your children!
IMHO, keeping the money a secret is a bad idea. Your daughter will find out eventually, and she will be (rightfully) hurt. Money is one of the biggest issues that breaks up families forever. Swearing your daughter to "secrecy" implies that this money makes her different and sends her the message that she is more important than her sister or her sister's feelings. I would be honest and explain the situation to both of them, and work together as a family to determine what is right. They may surprise you with a mature solution.
I know college is expensive and kudos to the OP for thinking about using it for those expenses instead of "fun money."
Every parent has to make their own decision when it comes to how much they want to pay for college and how much of the burden (likely in the form of loans) they want to place upon their child. I'm of the opinion that some of the burden SHOULD be on the student. Let them take ownership of the bills. That might keep them at the books instead of going out for Tuesday/Thursday nights at the local bar for party night.
However, I fail to realize why daughter #2 is getting a check at all. The father should not be retiring if he can't afford the "running costs" of a minor child. And there is no real way to give daughter #2 that money and letting it feel "fair" to daughter #1.
Bearing in mind what I said in the 2nd paragraph about letting the student take on some of the burden, how about donating the check in its entirety to charity. That resolves the fairness problem entirely and teaches everyone involved (including the OP) an important life lesson.
It is because we don't need the money that the money is an issue. If we needed it, we'd use it to support dd#2. We don't. However, given that dh and I will never see what we've paid into SS back in our lifetime, I'm not turning down money the government is giving dd.
I'm only approaching the whole idea of "fairness." I've seen many, MANY times on here where people will berate a poster who used government funding for things other than the intended purpose. Seems like the OP doesn't need the money to support her child in the way it was intended for, so maybe a different view of fairness was in order.
Either way, dishing it out to only one child is certainly not fair, and if the money is NOT being used for the intended purpose, I wonder what the OP has against her eldest daughter when it comes to not allocating EQUAL amounts of money for both of her kids. Sounds a bit like favoritism to me.
No, the money is intended for dd#2 unless we need and we don't. It's hers not mine to do with as I wish. It's just not mine. If the government wanted it to be mine, they'd send it to me.
It's actually a good point, though. With people in general complaining about all the entitlements being handed out and how taxpayers shouldn't have to foot the bill, if they CAN afford to house, clothe and feed their daughter without a government handout, maybe the "fair" thing to do would be to send the check back to the government, and do what most parents do on their own - pay for college themselves.
This isn't an entitlement. We pay for SS. This is our money we paid into the system coming back to dd#2. Well, a small portion of it. Between our contribution and our employers contributions, I doubt dh and I will live long enough to recoup what we've paid into the system.
This isn't welfare or some other entitlement program. It's something we paid for from the time we were 16 and took our first jobs.
SS benefits are taxed when a person makes more than $25000 per year combined income. So if she receives $12000 a year from SS she can earn $13000 in other income and still be under the guidelines. Anything more would be taxed based on the difference of the $amount over $25000.
If she received $12,000 a year in SS benefits, you would take HALF of that and add it to any other income...including tax-exempt interest. If the total comes to more than $25,000, some of the SS benefits could be taxable.
Quote:
You can follow these two quick steps to see if your benefits are taxable:
Add one-half of the Social Security benefits you received to all your other income, including tax-exempt interest. Tax-exempt interest includes interest from state and municipal bonds.
Next, compare this total to the ‘base amount’ for your filing status. If the total is more than your base amount, then some of your benefits may be taxable.
The three 2012 base amounts are:
$25,000 for single, head of household, qualifying widow or widower with a dependent child or married individuals filing separately who did not live with their spouse at any time during the year
No, the money is intended for dd#2 unless we need and we don't. It's hers not mine to do with as I wish. It's just not mine. If the government wanted it to be mine, they'd send it to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler
This isn't an entitlement. We pay for SS. This is our money we paid into the system coming back to dd#2. Well, a small portion of it. Between our contribution and our employers contributions, I doubt dh and I will live long enough to recoup what we've paid into the system.
This isn't welfare or some other entitlement program. It's something we paid for from the time we were 16 and took our first jobs.
Do you see the contradiction here? Your daughter didn't pay into the program that makes the benefit possible, you and your husband did. So, why would you consider the money her's to do use as she wanted?
Everybody has said the same thing. Give the girls the same amount towards their college expenses. All the rest is unnecessary drama.
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