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But it does occur there most of the time, or do you permanently remove sex from your bedroom? I would hate to be married and not be able to wrap my arms around my wife and get frisky at night if I was in the mood.
Um, hate to tell you this, but most people only cosleep for a few months. Those months, I guarantee you, 99% of parents have a) no energy for sex and b) having just squeezed a watermelon out from between their legs, most mothers would refute your advances anyway.
im sure getting them used to their own crib and their own room at an early stage helped promote them sleeping through the night at an early stage. of course, a fairly strict routine helped, as well as never putting them down asleep, but rather allowing them to soothe themselves to sleep. all 4 of our children slept through the night by 4 months old, and have continued to do so to this day.
My kids are fairly close together in age - 18-19 months between the three. My first...we hit the jackpot. Coslept for 3 months, and I swear the kid slept through the night at 6 weeks old - rare for a breastfed baby, but he was a good feeder. Absolutely no problem with the crib transition, took three LONG naps a day, it was unbelievable.
Did the same with our daughter... nope. Oh, she transitioned to her crib fine, but this girl never, ever wanted to sleep. Hell, she is 17 months old, and she was up twice last night. At this point, I've resorted to ordering her back to sleep over the video monitor, because it's become ridiculous. The only thing that differed between these two kids is (other than personalities) she was a horrible nurser. A long session for her was 5 minutes. I'm really hoping when #3 comes along next month, he or she will be more like their brother when it comes to eating and sleeping!
I definitely agree with you about routine, though. We keep a fairly strict bedtime and naptime routine, and it definitely helped all of them with their sleep.
My son refused to sleep at all unless someone was holding him for the first 3 months of his life. So we held him.
By month 4, we had him sleeping in his own crib in his own room and he was putting HIMSELF to sleep.
He sleeps there now (in fact insists on it) by himself. All you have to do is put him down and he lies down by himself and nods off. This has been since month 4. People marvel that it's so easy for us to put the kid to sleep.
So sleeping with your kid in the beginning does not foretell how he will be in the future. He wasn't ready for being by himself, he was a tummy sleeper (REFUSED to sleep on his back - still does), and once he was a little older, he was totally cool with having his own bed and space. He has slept 11-12 hours straight through the night (6pm to 6am) for almost a year now.
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Seems that many folks have the parenting care of a reptile ]
Another sanctimommy/daddy. I anticipate a lifelong friendship between you and the parent who started the thread, "Put down the %$#@ cell phone and HUG your child!!!!"
Last edited by springfieldva; 04-02-2013 at 11:29 AM..
I'm currently expecting my first child in July and I'm hoping not to have to co-sleep. In fact, it wasn't until a friend gave birth a month ago and learned that her baby refused to sleep in her crib right away that I began to see it may not be up to me.
So we have a plan in case the baby won't sleep in his crib but I'd prefer he do. Another friend had a very hard time transitioning her baby fom co-sleeping to crib.
I'm currently expecting my first child in July and I'm hoping not to have to co-sleep. In fact, it wasn't until a friend gave birth a month ago and learned that her baby refused to sleep in her crib right away that I began to see it may not be up to me.
So we have a plan in case the baby won't sleep in his crib but I'd prefer he do. Another friend had a very hard time transitioning her baby fom co-sleeping to crib.
Try not to worry, some babies transition really easily. My daughter slept in my bed the first few months (3 I think) and then she stopped liking it so I put her in her own bed (which was a cardboard box at that point!) and she was fine, even self-settled wonderfully (until the 4 month sleep regression hit, it all went downhill from there but usually that only lasts a few weeks not months as in my case)
to each their own - just know/adjust for the risk regardless of what you do - our two were great sleepers and continue to do pretty well at 2yrs & 3 yrs ..... the 3yr old tries to sneak into bed on occasion, but we don't accomodate enough for it to be habit forming .... our friends had a huge issue with their daughter pretty much refuse to sleep anywhere but in their room, this was in the toddler range and they didn't have any problems when the kid was still in full baby mode getting her to sleep elsewhere
we kept our kids in a pack & play by the bed - we were big fans of swaddling as it seemed like it really helped settled them down in their routine and would keep them from waking themselves up with
once they were sleeping through the night and we were more comfortable with having them around they got to move to their own rooms into their cribs
this is what worked for us and it was an option for us .... there are some who may not have the actual physical space to do the same so what works for them and what is available for them could very well be different
personally, i'd be too nervous to have a newborn sleeping in my bed or a baby for that matter ....... i'm comfortable with a toddler up as far as safety, but I find it very hard to get any real rest with them in there so I try to limit it ... I also want to maintain them sleeping well in their own spaces as a general rule
Half my family is from Asia were co-sleeping is completely normal. My daughter and sister co-slept with me until they were 3 or so when they left on their own, together. It wasn't a big deal. Hell, my aunt (the youngest of my stepmom's siblings) slept in the same bed with her parents until she was 7. She is not traumatized by it in anyway.
If you don't want to co-sleep because you think the cons outweigh the benefits, that is completely your business but the nonsense about it causing children to be overly dependent is belied by the fact that very successful societies endorse co-sleeping as its norm.
And for the typical non-drinking, non-medicated adult the idea that you would roll over and smother your newborn would be laughable if it wasn't so ridiculous.
Half my family is from Asia were co-sleeping is completely normal. My daughter and sister co-slept with me until they were 3 or so when they left on their own, together. It wasn't a big deal. Hell, my aunt (the youngest of my stepmom's siblings) slept in the same bed with her parents until she was 7. She is not traumatized by it in anyway.
If you don't want to co-sleep because you think the cons outweigh the benefits, that is completely your business but the nonsense about it causing children to be overly dependent is belied by the fact that very successful societies endorse co-sleeping as its norm.
And for the typical non-drinking, non-medicated adult the idea that you would roll over and smother your newborn would be laughable if it wasn't so ridiculous.
And for the typical non-drinking, non-medicated adult the idea that you would roll over and smother your newborn would be laughable if it wasn't so ridiculous.
Really depends on what kind of sleeper you are. I'm a deep sleeper and toss a lot, plus I like snuggling up in a thick blanket, so for me, in order to not smother DS, I ended up sleeping really badly and shallowly, I was really tense and afraid to move, afraid I'd pull the blanket over him, so I'd fall asleep for a short stretch of time and then wake up with a start, panicked every time, because I had absolutely no awareness of what could've happened while I was asleep. Took a couple of nights to figure out I got way better sleep with DS in a bassinet next to us, especially since I couldn't nurse lying down anyway.
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