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My daughter is 14 and is already asking about having Botox because when she raises her eyebrows, she gets lines in her forehead. She wants her skin perfectly smooth. Ridiculous.
She also wants Juvederm for the "parenthesis" lines that go from nose to mouth. Again. Ridiculous.
She also wants lipo. Absolutely ridiculous. She's 5'6" and weighs about 115 and a good part of that is muscle because she takes 5 dance classes a week and dances/stretches constantly.
Well the op sounds like she actually has a defect and your daughter sounds little vain.
I'm telling that is not true here. I don't know anyone who can keep their child on their insurance past 25 and being in school is a requirement. Otherwise they're expected to get a job and their own insurance.
Things are changing here. I used to be able to cover my dh on my insurance. He was, suddenly, dropped 4 years ago because his employer offered insurance.
Insurance companies do not have to carry adult children and if they do, they have the right to set the requirements to carry them as well as the rates. I can carry dd#2 after she's 18, provided she's in school but I have to pay for it as well.
Do you live in the United States? If so, you're wrong. Allowing all "children" up to age 26 to stay on their parent's insurance regardless of circumstances has been made the law of the land as it's part of "Obama care". It took effect a couple of years ago. The rules that an adult child has to be a student to be covered by a parent's insurance no longer applies. So your kids can stay on your insurance until they turn 26 even if they work or get married. The insurance company is required to cover them by law.
Someone who thinks they're going to fix something via plastic surgery needs a solid psychiatric evaluation before said surgery. Changing your appearance won't change anything about you other than what you look like in the mirror.
I happen to have a prominant chin. For years it bothered me (my orthodontist handed me a referral to "get your chin fixed" the day my braces came off). As I've matured, I've learned that imperfections in my appearance aren't who I am and I don't need anyone in my life who thinks they are. To remake myself to please others is nonesense. It's their problem if they don't like it and they can stuff it. When I was immature, I thought fixing my chin would fix something. Now I know it wouldn't have. Now that I know that, psychologically, I'm ready for the surgery but I find I don't want to spend the money. If it were free, I'd do it but it's not worth thousands of dollars to "fix" because it ain't broke. Nothing changes but my profile if I "fix" my chin. It's just something about my features I don't like. There's always going to be something I don't like about my features. If plastic surgery is done for the wrong reasons, you just find something else to not like when done or you don't like the plastic surgery itself. Look at Micheal Jackson. Worked so well for him.
If someone wants to improve their appearance just to improve their appearance, fine. If they think they need plastic surgery to feel good about themselves, they need a psychiatrist first. THAT is having plastic surgery for the wrong reasons. Plastic surgery won't change who you are. If you are letting a physical feature that others don't see as a deformity impact your self worth, you need a psychiatrist long before a plastic surgeon. (I don't care if you do see it as a deformity. If others don't, it's not a deformity. The problem is YOU seeing it as a deformity and, quite likely, blaming things on "it" that shoudln't be.)
Well, some people actually do have a "deformity" and their self esteem and life may in fact get better by fixing that deformity. If you talk to people who have had various defects fixed most will say that it did improve their lives. Like I mentioned earlier I've had something that I viewed to be a defect fixed by plastic surgery and it's by far one of the best things I've done for myself and it solved a number of problems for me. Therapy wouldn't have helped in this aspect at all because it was a physical problem, not a psychological one. Michael Jackson is a very bad example since he had a psychological disorder that caused him to view his appearance in a very skewed way which lead him to take extreme actions. Someone who is suffering because she has a big nose, loose skin from pregnancy or is flat chested will in fact benefit from having that one thing improved.
Our appearance definitely does effect how other people sees us and how we see and feel about ourselves so it's rather foolish to argue that changing one's appearance does nothing for one's self esteem, confidence and our own and others' perception of one self. I can personally attest to the fact that it does and so can many others.
I guess it depends what the reason was. I know a couple girls who had nose jobs, and to put it politely, it was definitely a good investment both financially and aesthetically.
I'm 18, but one year ago I had a semi emotional breakdown. I wanted a nose job (that I will be getting in the near future) I was so distraught about it that I couldn't even speak of it, I had to send my request via an incredibly long text message: "OMG mom, I'm totes ugly. I need a nose jawb, so I can look like Kim Kardashian. WAH!" (I'm joking)
Anways, apparently my mother was completley unaware of how I felt about my face. Even though I have made requests when I was 10 for a nose job, and she just simply forgot so I simply stopped asking(I could only dream and cry and dream some more) I never told my father my requests, because I don't like looking insecure in front of him.
Sadly, I had my one of many emotional breakdowns in a public place (a book store) My aunt was there, and she was ranting on how "beautiful" I was. My mother was agreeing, how I was such a "beautiful" baby, and how people would walk up to me and want to hold me and BLAH *insert motherly banter* Being a beautiful baby doesn't count, everyone likes babies.
I swear, I hate family members when it comes to this crap. Of course they're going to find me attractive, they've known me all my life and share the same DNA. If they were strangers they'd think otherwise.
My dad found out, and basically cried. "If only she could see what we see..." Of course you're going to think I'm awesome, I look just like you!
So anywho, how would you feel if your child requested plastic surgery? Supportive? Encouraging? Or are you going to be bias, and chant the whole "everyone is beautiful" mantra?
In answer to your question, if a child of mine had an unattractive feature - an overly large nose, protruding ears, a receding chin, was flat chested - or too well endowed - I would have absolutely no problem with paying for cosmetic or plastic surgery. None.
Life is a lot easier when people are not encumbered with a physical feature that they dislike, that causes emotional distress, or makes them self conscious. No one needs to like this, but the fact is; that attractive people are more secure, are favored by teachers, and tend to be better received in the work environment.
I would of course, only select a board certified plastic surgeon. I don't think it's frivolous and I think, it's money well spent.
Now with that said, there are some things in your post that are somewhat alarming. I don't know exactly what you mean about "emotional breakdowns".
That is a cause for concern. Also, your attitude about this surgery is jocular, and a bit silly. This is a serious decision. I can't tell if you are trying to be funny or what. I am a little perplexed.
Plastic surgery can improve and change lives. I had a college friend with overly large breasts. People would joke around with her asking if they could "have some of that" and some men were very crude.
In her early 20s she underwent breast reduction surgery.
When I saw her again the change was remarkable! She looked slender and was able to dress in younger and age appropriate clothes. She was radiant and confident, and for the first time, envolved romantically.
So, yes, if one of my children needed cosmetic surgery, I'd be compassionate and supportive.
Well the op sounds like she actually has a defect and your daughter sounds little vain.
Why do her relatives not see this defect as a defect? A defect would have been fixed. Doctors would have brought it up long ago. Unless it's a cosmetic defect and then it's not a defect. It's just something she doesn't like.
Do you live in the United States? If so, you're wrong. Allowing all "children" up to age 26 to stay on their parent's insurance regardless of circumstances has been made the law of the land as it's part of "Obama care". It took effect a couple of years ago. The rules that an adult child has to be a student to be covered by a parent's insurance no longer applies. So your kids can stay on your insurance until they turn 26 even if they work or get married. The insurance company is required to cover them by law.
I live in the united states and know all about this because my dd is turning 18 in June. I've been told she can stay on until she's 25 as long as she's in school and I pay $350/month extra to keep her on my insurance. Once she's out of school, she has 6 months to find her own insurance.
We're going to look into purchasing insurance through the university though as $350/month is steep, IMO for an 18 year old. That's what I pay for the family plan now. They're, basically, doubling my contribution to keep her on my policy.
Why do her relatives not see this defect as a defect? A defect would have been fixed. Doctors would have brought it up long ago. Unless it's a cosmetic defect and then it's not a defect. It's just something she doesn't like.
I had a growth on my nose that didn't NEED to e taken off since it wasn't cancerous but it was the size of a pea and the root cause of harassment for many many years.
No one saw it as a deformity, it was like a mole, an ugly azz pea sized mole on my face that I got harassed for.
Well, some people actually do have a "deformity" and their self esteem and life may in fact get better by fixing that deformity. If you talk to people who have had various defects fixed most will say that it did improve their lives. Like I mentioned earlier I've had something that I viewed to be a defect fixed by plastic surgery and it's by far one of the best things I've done for myself and it solved a number of problems for me. Therapy wouldn't have helped in this aspect at all because it was a physical problem, not a psychological one. Michael Jackson is a very bad example since he had a psychological disorder that caused him to view his appearance in a very skewed way which lead him to take extreme actions. Someone who is suffering because she has a big nose, loose skin from pregnancy or is flat chested will in fact benefit from having that one thing improved.
Our appearance definitely does effect how other people sees us and how we see and feel about ourselves so it's rather foolish to argue that changing one's appearance does nothing for one's self esteem, confidence and our own and others' perception of one self. I can personally attest to the fact that it does and so can many others.
Small breasts are not deformities. Having ears that aren't pinned back isn't a deformity. There are legitimate deformities and there are things that are NOT deformities.
I live in the united states and know all about this because my dd is turning 18 in June. I've been told she can stay on until she's 25 as long as she's in school and I pay $350/month extra to keep her on my insurance. Once she's out of school, she has 6 months to find her own insurance.
We're going to look into purchasing insurance through the university though as $350/month is steep, IMO for an 18 year old. That's what I pay for the family plan now. They're, basically, doubling my contribution to keep her on my policy.
Well, it looks like whoever informed you don't know about the new law that took effect in 2010.
Here is some info from the DOL website about The Affordable Care Act as it pertains to adult children:
"Before the President signed the Affordable Care Act into law, many health plans and issuers could remove adult children from their parents' policies because of their age, whether or not they were a student or where they lived. The Affordable Care Act requires plans and issuers that offer dependent coverage to make the coverage available until the adult child reaches the age of 26. Many parents and their children who worried about losing health insurance after they graduated from college no longer have to worry."
"The Affordable Care Act requires plans and issuers that offer dependent coverage to make the coverage available until a child reaches the age of 26. Both married and unmarried children qualify for this coverage. This rule applies to all plans in the individual market and to new employer plans. It also applies to existing employer plans unless the adult child has another offer of employer-based coverage (such as through his or her job). Beginning in 2014, children up to age 26 can stay on their parent's employer plan even if they have another offer of coverage through an employer."
It looks like I was wrong about the underlined part as the change hasn't taken effect yet. But it will.
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Of course you're going to think I'm awesome, I look just like you!
I am a little perplexed.
A defect would have been fixed. Doctors would have brought it up long ago. Unless it's a cosmetic defect and then it's not a defect. It's just something she doesn't like.
