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Old 05-09-2013, 02:56 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,239,445 times
Reputation: 4111

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Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
You think it's about their personal opinion?
I could answer you in kind, Moderator Cut but that wouldn't be very charitable.

Last edited by Jaded; 05-09-2013 at 03:28 PM.. Reason: Personal Attack

 
Old 05-09-2013, 02:57 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,239,445 times
Reputation: 4111
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Dissenter View Post
OP, you should really not be encouraging this or do more to prevent this from happening. I think the others girl's parents are wrong but I'm thinking about your son here. If escalates to the point of the police getting involved, your son will be in all types of and have potentially severe legal consequences.
What laws are being broken, please?
 
Old 05-09-2013, 02:57 PM
 
6,455 posts, read 9,558,315 times
Reputation: 10774
Quote:
Originally Posted by picklejuice View Post
You bet! Throughout the years, I've witnessed many examples of all of those things (and more) happening to young people.
Damn straight! It's certainly not uncommon!
 
Old 05-09-2013, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,239,445 times
Reputation: 4111
Quote:
Originally Posted by picklejuice View Post
If he suspects or knows his teenage daughter is bedding her older teenage boyfriend? You bet! It happens all of the time!
I've inhabited the planet for 38 years and have never known it to happen, but I'll take your word for it. Might just be a question of where we both live.
 
Old 05-09-2013, 02:59 PM
 
15,212 posts, read 16,130,272 times
Reputation: 25185
Quote:
Originally Posted by djacques View Post
Do you think those things are at all likely to happen?
I have no idea. But I still think the valuable lesson for the son here is that this father is in the position of power and gets to call the shots. If the son decides he doesn't care, then he has to be prepared to live with the consequences.

The OP isn't doing anyone any favors if she encourages her son to circumvent the dad's order that his daughter can't date til she goes to college. She's encouraging both kids to be dishonest and the father (described by the OP as a 6th generation Montana rancher) has already shown himself to rule with an iron fist. There's no telling what type of punishment he'll inflict on his daughter, or what actions he'll take if he finds out the two are communicating.
 
Old 05-09-2013, 03:00 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 86,307,968 times
Reputation: 39688
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Do me a favor. Explain the importance of respecting authority, especially from the point of view of an adult with judgement. Presumably if it is important to teach the kids, there is some lifelong value in it. Why is important to respect adults in authority?

Why don't you ask a Marine? Those in the military would understand this concept of respecting authority

Everyone in life has to answer to someone else on a regular basis or just bend to the authority of others.

When you don't you risk everything from financial ruin (loss of a job) to potential arrest or even death.

Teens are not yet adults. They are not on the same level as adults because they have not reached the point in life where they know enough to be in complete charge of themselves.

Teaching kids/teens to respect adults in authority is character building.

It is good practice for the self-discipline they will need to be civilized, productive adults in a few short years.
 
Old 05-09-2013, 03:01 PM
 
Location: A place that's too cold
4,119 posts, read 4,084,825 times
Reputation: 10170
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Sabinerose, you know I'm on your side okay?

But I really don't think it's a good idea for you to condone your son finding a way around this girl's parents.

I think the bigger lesson for him is that even when we disagree with someone in authority, we must respect that authority and its "rules". THAT is what it means to be an adult in control of our actions.
I haven't read all 4 pages of this thread yet, but had to pause after reading the above quote. I have to respectfully disagree about respecting authority, at least to the extent that this post implies. From all I have read, there was no rational reason given by the girl's parents in forbidding continuing her relationship with OPs son. She is definitely at an age where parental authority and control should be lessening, not gripping her. Becoming an adult includes questioning authority, and even going against authority when it is wrong. Blind obedience to irrational authority leads to disaster.
 
Old 05-09-2013, 03:01 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,239,445 times
Reputation: 4111
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
I have no idea. But I still think the valuable lesson for the son here is that this father is in the position of power and gets to call the shots. If the son decides he doesn't care, then he has to be prepared to live with the consequences.
That's true. I don't think sucking up to power is a particularly attractive way to live, but we're all different.
 
Old 05-09-2013, 03:06 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 86,307,968 times
Reputation: 39688
Quote:
Originally Posted by kayanne View Post
I haven't read all 4 pages of this thread yet, but had to pause after reading the above quote. I have to respectfully disagree about respecting authority, at least to the extent that this post implies. From all I have read, there was no rational reason given by the girl's parents in forbidding continuing her relationship with OPs son. She is definitely at an age where parental authority and control should be lessening, not gripping her. Becoming an adult includes questioning authority, and even going against authority when it is wrong. Blind obedience to irrational authority leads to disaster.
I am perplexed as to why this is such a difficult concept for some here to grasp

It doesn't matter whether or not the girls parents have "rational reasons" for forbidding her dating.

It doesn't matter if we like the girls parents or think they are complete control freak nut jobs!

They are her parents! THEY get to decide how to parent their daughter.

EVERYTHING else is totally irrelevant.

Though I do appreciate you being willing to respectfully disagree
 
Old 05-09-2013, 03:07 PM
 
Location: Michigan
12,715 posts, read 11,239,445 times
Reputation: 4111
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
They are her parents! THEY get to decide how to parent their daughter.
And nobody else has to help them do it if they think they are loons. Or even make it easier.
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