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Old 05-19-2013, 01:38 PM
 
1,168 posts, read 1,827,500 times
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We know a couple with three kids who I guess are "friends," though it's mostly our kids who are friends. They became vegans a couple of years ago. This year, they invited my daughter to a local hotel/water park, where they are spending the weekend to celebrate.

This is the e-mail she sent me:

"(Your daughter) cannot sleep over since the room has only 3 beds plus we are going out that evening and don't know when we'll be back.
You are welcome to drop her off any time in the morning, just please have her eat breakfast at home since we don't eat there.
There is nothing that they offer there that we can eat except for lettuce ;-) so we bring our own fruits and stuff for breakfast and make sandwiches for lunch in our room... (Shhhh - don't tell them )
There is a fee to get in for the day, I just called them, it's $40 a person.
and then either pack her a lunch box or send some extra cash with her so she can buy lunch since we don't..."

And then there's stuff about what kind of present we should buy the kid.

I find this the most outrageous "invitation" I've ever gotten.
Am I right?
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Old 05-19-2013, 01:53 PM
 
Location: here
24,469 posts, read 28,730,432 times
Reputation: 31039
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gettingouttahere View Post
We know a couple with three kids who I guess are "friends," though it's mostly our kids who are friends. They became vegans a couple of years ago. This year, they invited my daughter to a local hotel/water park, where they are spending the weekend to celebrate.

This is the e-mail she sent me:

"(Your daughter) cannot sleep over since the room has only 3 beds plus we are going out that evening and don't know when we'll be back.
You are welcome to drop her off any time in the morning, just please have her eat breakfast at home since we don't eat there.
There is nothing that they offer there that we can eat except for lettuce ;-) so we bring our own fruits and stuff for breakfast and make sandwiches for lunch in our room... (Shhhh - don't tell them )
There is a fee to get in for the day, I just called them, it's $40 a person.
and then either pack her a lunch box or send some extra cash with her so she can buy lunch since we don't..."

And then there's stuff about what kind of present we should buy the kid.

I find this the most outrageous "invitation" I've ever gotten.
Am I right?
Is this for a birthday? If they are inviting your daughter to what is basically a birthday party, they should pay for entrance into the park. I think the rest of it could have been worded in a less rude way and still have said the same thing. Something like:
"We are staying at XYZ for the weekend, and would like to invite your daughter to spend the day with us. We bring out our own food instead of buying in the park. We'll have fruits and vegetables to eat, but you could send something else if she would prefer."

I'm not sure how I'd respond. If I were your daughter I think I'd feel kind of awkward showing up after everyone else, leaving before everyone else, and eating different food than everyone else. How far away is this place that they are staying in a hotel, but expect you to drive there in the morning?
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Old 05-19-2013, 01:54 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,471 posts, read 15,905,878 times
Reputation: 38735
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gettingouttahere View Post
We know a couple with three kids who I guess are "friends," though it's mostly our kids who are friends. They became vegans a couple of years ago. This year, they invited my daughter to a local hotel/water park, where they are spending the weekend to celebrate.

This is the e-mail she sent me:

"(Your daughter) cannot sleep over since the room has only 3 beds plus we are going out that evening and don't know when we'll be back.
You are welcome to drop her off any time in the morning, just please have her eat breakfast at home since we don't eat there.
There is nothing that they offer there that we can eat except for lettuce ;-) so we bring our own fruits and stuff for breakfast and make sandwiches for lunch in our room... (Shhhh - don't tell them )
There is a fee to get in for the day, I just called them, it's $40 a person.
and then either pack her a lunch box or send some extra cash with her so she can buy lunch since we don't..."

And then there's stuff about what kind of present we should buy the kid.

I find this the most outrageous "invitation" I've ever gotten.
Am I right?
Is it possible that your daughter "invited herself' along and they didn't have the heart to just tell her "No"? What a terrible "invitation".

But, that doesn't explain the stuff about the present.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:01 PM
 
1,168 posts, read 1,827,500 times
Reputation: 1074
No no, this is them going to the water park for the weekend for their daughter's birthday present, inviting just my daughter to join them (because they girls are so close), and then stipulating all the conditions. Like -- you pay, you bring your own food, you get her there, you buy this kind of gift.

Grr.

It's over now. It was this weekend. I'm still seething.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:07 PM
 
Location: here
24,469 posts, read 28,730,432 times
Reputation: 31039
Did she go?
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:08 PM
 
2,251 posts, read 4,311,198 times
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Never mind. The trip is over.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:08 PM
 
4,762 posts, read 10,224,033 times
Reputation: 7792
Well "I" would be ticked and want to say "no way"! But...

I would take into consideration the feelings of my daughter. If she really wanted to go or not.

And I would also take into consideration if I could afford to pay for that (if I couldn't), then no.

So if I could afford it and my daughter really wanted to go, then I would give her the money and take her. Also I would pack a breakfast and lunch full of meat and other non-vegetarian foods.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:39 PM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,319,241 times
Reputation: 32238
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gettingouttahere View Post
There is nothing that they offer there that we can eat except for lettuce ;-) so we bring our own fruits and stuff for breakfast and make sandwiches for lunch in our room... (Shhhh - don't tell them )


Since when do motels care if you eat in the room? Most have coffee makers. People take the free breakfast back to their room. Keycards advertise the local pizza delivery joint. Room service.

That's stranger to me than a parent asking friends to pay their own way. Not everyone can afford to pay for friends to come. These people may not want to come right out and say, "We're pinching pennies." I'd have called, talked to the mom, found out what's what and made the decision from there. And the decision would be based on my child's friendship and if we could afford it. Not on a semi-strange email invitation from the mother.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:46 PM
 
Location: E ND & NW MN
4,731 posts, read 9,083,146 times
Reputation: 3454
For an invite to our 8 yr olds son's birthday party....it is assumed we would pay for any tickets, etc needed for any event (we give our son a certain number he can invite so we know the expenses). As for food, depending on the event we will say we will have snacks, etc if they want something different they can bring their own food.
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Old 05-19-2013, 02:48 PM
 
1,168 posts, read 1,827,500 times
Reputation: 1074
We got the "save the date" email months ago, so my daughter already knew about the event. It was only on Thursday that the other shoe dropped about the details, when the mom sent that email.

This family is not hurting for money. Well....who knows, they may be, but they certainly have all the usual upper middle class toys.

Had I known it was a pay your own way event, I would've declined at the initial notification and made arrangements for the girls to spend time together elsewhere. It ended up costing $40 for the entrance, $20 for food, and $20 for the gift. Sigh.
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