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Old 07-24-2013, 02:49 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DitsyD View Post
My children say "Ma'am" and "Sir" because they have manners, not because they are fake or prissy. They respect PEOPLE not just AGE or RANK.

Ma'am and Sir is NOT about age. I call folks much younger than me Ma'am and Sir because it is the polite thing to do. Being called Ma'am does not make me feel old; it makes me feel that the person speaking is polite and well mannered and cares enough to be polite to me.

Would you rather be called Ma'am or B*tch?
It is the polite thing to do in YOUR culture. In some cultures it is kind of rude to call a woman ma'am.

Just because someone has DIFFERENT manners does not mean they have NO manners.

 
Old 07-24-2013, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lacerta View Post
Not always.

To me, sir and ma'am, in most circumstances, sound more mocking than polite.
Wow that is such a foreign concept to me. Having Sir and Ma'am drilled into me since birth, I learned to use it all the time and still do at age 66. I certainly hope nobody thinks I'm mocking them. But I'm in the South and I doubt most here would think that.

Not only did I get that lesson at home with a officer father but I also worked in the Pentagon for a number of years and of course I used it there as well. Sometimes I even say yes Sir to my DH more as habit and to model for our kids. Certainly has nothing to do with thinking he is any higher in rank than I am.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 02:51 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ollie1946 View Post
I bet saying SIR to a cop when you are stopped is done across the land. Don't slur the sir!

Sir and Ma'm are used in the military. A female senator who was hammering at an Army general told him to stop saying ma'm to her; that she was a US Senator. She was also ignorant of the military culture.

Around her we would say officer not sir as in; "Officer, is there something wrong?" not so much with the "yes, sir", "no, sir" stuff.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 02:53 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 53,797,672 times
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Had neighbors who addressed their parents by their first names in the 60's which was very unusual. Mother explained to me that she refused to be one of those women who called her own husband Daddy and didn't want him calling her Mommy so they decided early on that the kids could call them by their first names. worked just fine for them but it surely was unusual at the time.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 02:56 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 53,797,672 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
It is the polite thing to do in YOUR culture. In some cultures it is kind of rude to call a woman ma'am.

Just because someone has DIFFERENT manners does not mean they have NO manners.
I'm curious what culture it is where calling a woman ma'am is considered rude?

I also remember being taught never to refer to anybody as a man or woman but to use the words gentleman and lady. different strokes....
 
Old 07-24-2013, 03:09 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post

Not only did I get that lesson at home with a officer father but I also worked in the Pentagon for a number of years and of course I used it there as well.
My dad worked for the Department of Defense and spent his entire career based in Southern California. When the guys from the Pentagon came for a visit he'd tell them that CA is casual, they were going to get called by their first name and that he let his guys work in their shirt sleeves.

Apparently the Eastern brass would get all huffy until they were subjected to the business end of a Saturn V rocket being tested. He said the second day they ALWAYS came in mufti. By the end of the week they were used to being called Mel. They also asked where they could buy Hawaiian shirts. Which my dad wore to work on special occasions.

My siblings and I weren't raised with Sir or Ma'm. We said "Yeah" not yes. All of us pay our taxes, know how to use the right fork and hold a door for anyone simply because it's the nice thing to do. We all respected the heck out of both of our parents because they constantly demonstrated they were worthy of our respect.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
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I have never heard of Ma'am being considered rude. Ever. I grew up on a different continent, and women in positions of authority were addressed Ma'am. It's not uncommon in Britain either, with a different pronunciation though. I personally don't care for Sir or Ma'am, but where we live it's expected, and my children know that. Many children address me as Ma'am as they have been taught. I would never suppose to undermine their parents, or express ridicule or unhappiness with such a thing.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 03:19 PM
 
16,825 posts, read 17,637,209 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
I'm curious what culture it is where calling a woman ma'am is considered rude?

I also remember being taught never to refer to anybody as a man or woman but to use the words gentleman and lady. different strokes....
Some people, more in the NE, find "ma'am" to imply "a woman of a certain age", and thus implies, to some, a woman's age.

Please Don't Call Me 'Ma'am' : NPR

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/29/we...anted=all&_r=0

It is a regional difference I suspect.

I think the hat one is really telling. Some people find it disrespectful to wear a hat in the house, some people find going bareheaded ever disrespectful.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 03:35 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
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My military officer father never insisted on Ma'am or Sir. He had business in the Pentagon as well. We were taught that Admirals were simply men (at the time) who put their pants on one leg at a time like everyone else. They were most likely someone's dad as well.
 
Old 07-24-2013, 05:15 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,190 posts, read 7,944,550 times
Reputation: 3320
Quote:
Originally Posted by DitsyD View Post
My children say "Ma'am" and "Sir" because they have manners, not because they are fake or prissy. They respect PEOPLE not just AGE or RANK.

Ma'am and Sir is NOT about age. I call folks much younger than me Ma'am and Sir because it is the polite thing to do. Being called Ma'am does not make me feel old; it makes me feel that the person speaking is polite and well mannered and cares enough to be polite to me.
Is there no middle ground?
Seriously every question I asked the kid he followed up with a ma'am.

I'm not a ma'am. I'm 23, not someone's grandmother.

My point being, I wasn't much older than the kid and it was annoying, I don't ma'am people my own age.

Last edited by Jaded; 07-25-2013 at 01:53 AM.. Reason: Removed orphaned/deleted post
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