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Could be nothing, could be something. Whatever it is, an evaluation is needed. I would ask the mother about it as tactfully as possible. If she's not doing anything, it would probably be a good idea to call whatever child protection agency is in your area. If there IS a problem, it could be easily fixable if it is caught early. Or, if it's something like autism, early detection is CRUCIAL to his development and counteracting its effects.
But I have twin cousins who were VERY developmentally delayed in their speech. At 6 they are normal, and one is headed toward genius-hood (or whatever it's called). Now, they're twins, so that delay was very normal.
My other thought is this: It sounds like there was a lot of upheaval in this child's life if suddenly his mother needs to take refuge with her ex's mother. Big changes can cause a child to regress.
My son, who is now 7 years old and identified as gifted through the school, was not babbling/talking enough at about 18 months in my opinion, I am an educator. Anyway, my family, husband and others thought I was over reacting. I asked our pediatrician to assess his speech. She found that he was not using as many sounds as his peers. She sent us to a speech specialist. He went for services twice a week for 30 minutes for about a year and was released speaking in advanced sentences for his age. Fast forward 5 years, this child has an extensive vocabulary and uses words like constellation, actually, definitely, expensive, on a daily basis. His crititical thinking skills are far superior to children of his age and his speech is such that strangers stop us and ask how old he is. The key in OUR case (each person is different) IMHO is early detection and treatment (if there is an issue and there was for us). I totally agree with JrzDefector. If it were my child I would seek the assistance of a professional...with early detection and treatment some childhood disabilities can all but disappear over time.
Try speaking to the mother about the subject first. For all you know, there could already be some intervention going on here. There are a lot of assumptions being made before knowing.
It's the mom and the lack of parental skills. I have a baby cousin who is the exact same way, and although I am not a mother, my mother was pretty much the babysitter of the family so I grew up helping out with the rearing of the kids in our family.
What I've noticed is that if the mother or father are not actively interacting with their child, and speaking to their child on a daily basis, but leaving the child to just watch television programs or to themselves, the child will not be so social.
Children are very malleable at this age, and if you are a parent (like another relative of mine) that speaks to your child daily, reads to them, teaches them their colors while say--at the grocery store--the child is going to be more likely sociable and engaging.
I would perhaps speak to the mom but be delicate in the way you approach her, because with my cousin that is not speaking--going on 4 (he says little words but not much)--his parents will not have anyone give them advice on how to raise her child. Silly if you ask me but that's there hard lesson to learn.
Perhaps you can suggest taking all of your kids on a trip to the library and then saying afterwards, "your son seems to really enjoy being read too, maybe we should take some books home so he can have bedtime stories..."
That might be the case -- but a child I know was going to a speech therapist and they told the mother the exact opposite. She is a SAHM and she was interacting with the child so much that she was anticipating his needs and responding to his signals and grunts too much they said, she was making it too easy for him to communicate without words.
What they told her was that she needed to stop asking him and letting him nod or shake his head no, point and insist that he respond verbally.
One example was when she read books to him, one of his favorite was a big book with lots of pictures where she would ask "where is the kitten" and he would point, his pointing vocabulary was very high, he just didn't feel the need to say the words and needed that little push.
My son, who is now 7 years old and identified as gifted through the school, was not babbling/talking enough at about 18 months in my opinion, I am an educator. Anyway, my family, husband and others thought I was over reacting. I asked our pediatrician to assess his speech. She found that he was not using as many sounds as his peers. She sent us to a speech specialist. He went for services twice a week for 30 minutes for about a year and was released speaking in advanced sentences for his age. Fast forward 5 years, this child has an extensive vocabulary and uses words like constellation, actually, definitely, expensive, on a daily basis. His crititical thinking skills are far superior to children of his age and his speech is such that strangers stop us and ask how old he is. The key in OUR case (each person is different) IMHO is early detection and treatment (if there is an issue and there was for us). I totally agree with JrzDefector. If it were my child I would seek the assistance of a professional...with early detection and treatment some childhood disabilities can all but disappear over time.
They put my kid in speech therapy when he was in the 2nd grade, he began talking at home after age 3 and had no speech impediment but refused to talk at school except to one teacher. She only got angry and frustrated with him because he is stubborn and refused to speak at all with her.
She asked me if he was a mute and said she thought he was, and then she said she really didn't know if he had speech problems or not because she could never get him to make a single sound. He totally exasperated her.
I told him that he had to start talking at school and he told me he would start talking in 3rd grade and he did. He was shy but he's also gotten over that. He always liked school so it wasn't any issue there, I asked the teacher how he was socially with the kids and she said all the kids liked him but they would talk for him so he wouldn't have to talk. He was never a behavior problem, he had no trouble academically.
This little boy does not have one word. Not one. No "mamamama" no "bababba" nothing but whistles, cries, grunts and whirrs.
He cannot ask for anything, all he can do is point and grunt.
Mom is kind of traumatised herself having just got custody back, but he was only gone from her for 7 months and I doubt it's made him lose all language skills completely. I suspect there was a problem long before.
I had a chat to a child specialist who suggested he may be deaf. Now, he does turn sometimes when you call him but not very often, also it has to be quite loud.
I'm amazed this hasn't been picked up sooner but mom is in total denial. She thinks he just watches too much Teletubbies.
That's not normal even in terms of speech delay at 3 (my son is 3 and has a significant speech delay). If there is not a single word and signs of possible hearing delay that is being ignored/in denial, then you may want to consider the possibility of reporting it yourself because that starts to border on neglect. Like I said, my own has a significant delay - and even I am shocked to hear that.
This little boy does not have one word. Not one. No "mamamama" no "bababba" nothing but whistles, cries, grunts and whirrs.
He cannot ask for anything, all he can do is point and grunt.
Mom is kind of traumatised herself having just got custody back, but he was only gone from her for 7 months and I doubt it's made him lose all language skills completely. I suspect there was a problem long before.
I had a chat to a child specialist who suggested he may be deaf. Now, he does turn sometimes when you call him but not very often, also it has to be quite loud.
I'm amazed this hasn't been picked up sooner but mom is in total denial. She thinks he just watches too much Teletubbies.
Who did the mother lose custody to? It certainly does sound like a hearing problem, but if he was evaluated in any way, wouldn't they have picked up on that?
how is he with non-verbal communication? is he telling his parents/caregivers what he wants by pointing or even signing? check his hearing...he could be deaf or may have glue in his ears which degrade our hearing.
at 3 years old in the US, most kids are eligable for pre-k which is when they can get early intervention in speech, therapy, etc....so won't hurt to get him checked out.
what does his ped say at the kid's check-ups though?
This little boy does not have one word. Not one. No "mamamama" no "bababba" nothing but whistles, cries, grunts and whirrs.
He cannot ask for anything, all he can do is point and grunt.
Mom is kind of traumatised herself having just got custody back, but he was only gone from her for 7 months and I doubt it's made him lose all language skills completely. I suspect there was a problem long before.
I had a chat to a child specialist who suggested he may be deaf. Now, he does turn sometimes when you call him but not very often, also it has to be quite loud.
I'm amazed this hasn't been picked up sooner but mom is in total denial. She thinks he just watches too much Teletubbies.
7 months in a 3 year old's lifetime is a very long time and chances are there were some pretty big problems before that which led up to her losing custody.
A 3 year old definitely needs a stable home life.
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