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Old 09-07-2013, 09:36 PM
 
6,293 posts, read 10,542,774 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Not really. Poor diet isn't simply poverty. There has to be evidence of a poor diet in the height/weight, blood work, etc. She won't qualify by simply saying she has a poor diet. Let's be realistic. I'm sure Jersey feeds her daughter a healthy diet.
Not true. I have family members who got/get WIC. You just go in with pay stubs, and come out with your checks. You have to go to a class every so often.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:38 PM
 
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The reality is that the mother and baby will qualify for WIC, Medicaid, and if they're not living in your home, cash benefits and food stamps. The mother can stay on your private insurance until she's 26, even if they marry, and the baby can go on Medicaid. They can get WIC until the baby is 5 - the only issue is income qualification. Whether it is right for them to go ahead and reproduce on the dole is their decision.

That being said, this young woman should probably have an abortion. Is becoming a teacher a realistic goal for her? If so, she should terminate the pregnancy. She's never going to make it to that goal otherwise, since you cannot and will not support her to allow her to finish her education, which will take at least an additional two years. In addition, if she decides to go ahead with the pregnancy, she should do it outside of your home. Can you imagine being the sister sharing the bedroom with the pregnant older sister? I can't. Being a dependent child in your home does not include reproducing. It's not that unusual for the younger sister to promptly get pregnant once older sister does, thinking that it's acceptable, since parents accepted it from the older daughter.

I think your idea of sitting down with them with the pros and cons list for them to fill out is wonderful. I admire you for going ahead and telling them what you ARE able to do for them - namely, daughter continues on your insurance until 26, lots of love and emotional support, and some evening babysitting. Yes, if father can finish school he may be able to support them, but the likelihood of his sticking around is very, very small. It's not easy to collect child support if the father tries to avoid it by working under the table, moving to another state, etc. If they decide that they are going ahead with this, I would encourage them to marry, since it gives your daughter and the baby an added degree of financial security, and gives your daughter access to social security survivors benefits, should the father die.

I would offer them the money for an abortion, or the first month's rent and security deposit on an apartment, that they move into NOW. That way, you're not forcing her to get an abortion. If she does decide on an abortion and continuing as a dependent child in your home, I would make her going and staying on Depo-Provera (the once every three months contraceptive shot) as a condition of her remaining in your home, and you need confirmation that she is actually receiving the shots. That way, this doesn't happen again. I just saw that someone mentioned that they had gotten pregnant on Depo. I've never, ever seen that, and I've got a lot of professional experience with it.

I'm very impressed with how you are planning for speaking sensibly with them, instead of just losing it.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:42 PM
 
43,011 posts, read 107,687,327 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spazkat9696 View Post
Not true. I have family members who got/get WIC. You just go in with pay stubs, and come out with your checks. You have to go to a class every so often.
It probably varies by state. That's not the way it is in PA.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:45 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
It probably varies by state. That's not the way it is in PA.
They live in PA and WV.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:47 PM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,221,053 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by parentologist View Post
The reality is that the mother and baby will qualify for WIC, Medicaid, and if they're not living in your home, cash benefits and food stamps. The mother can stay on your private insurance until she's 26, even if they marry, and the baby can go on Medicaid. They can get WIC until the baby is 5 - the only issue is income qualification. Whether it is right for them to go ahead and reproduce on the dole is their decision.

That being said, this young woman should probably have an abortion. Is becoming a teacher a realistic goal for her? If so, she should terminate the pregnancy. She's never going to make it to that goal otherwise, since you cannot and will not support her to allow her to finish her education, which will take at least an additional two years. In addition, if she decides to go ahead with the pregnancy, she should do it outside of your home. Can you imagine being the sister sharing the bedroom with the pregnant older sister? I can't. Being a dependent child in your home does not include reproducing. It's not that unusual for the younger sister to promptly get pregnant once older sister does, thinking that it's acceptable, since parents accepted it from the older daughter.

I think your idea of sitting down with them with the pros and cons list for them to fill out is wonderful. I admire you for going ahead and telling them what you ARE able to do for them - namely, daughter continues on your insurance until 26, lots of love and emotional support, and some evening babysitting. Yes, if father can finish school he may be able to support them, but the likelihood of his sticking around is very, very small. It's not easy to collect child support if the father tries to avoid it by working under the table, moving to another state, etc. If they decide that they are going ahead with this, I would encourage them to marry, since it gives your daughter and the baby an added degree of financial security, and gives your daughter access to social security survivors benefits, should the father die.

I would offer them the money for an abortion, or the first month's rent and security deposit on an apartment, that they move into NOW. That way, you're not forcing her to get an abortion. If she does decide on an abortion and continuing as a dependent child in your home, I would make her going and staying on Depo-Provera (the once every three months contraceptive shot) as a condition of her remaining in your home, and you need confirmation that she is actually receiving the shots. That way, this doesn't happen again. I just saw that someone mentioned that they had gotten pregnant on Depo. I've never, ever seen that, and I've got a lot of professional experience with it.

I'm very impressed with how you are planning for speaking sensibly with them, instead of just losing it.
.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:49 PM
 
6,293 posts, read 10,542,774 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
They had to qualify medically prior to being asked to show their income in PA.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:54 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spazkat9696 View Post
PENNSYLVANIA | Women, Infants & Children (WIC)
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
From your link
Quote:
WIC applicants must reside in Pennsylvania, have a medical or nutritional risk, and have a gross household income that does not exceed 185% of the U.S. Poverty Income Guidelines. Refer to
income chart below.
Anyone making less than 185% of the U.S.Poverty Income Guidelines would be considered at nutritional risk.
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Old 09-07-2013, 09:59 PM
 
43,011 posts, read 107,687,327 times
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Here's West Virginia's:

3. Nutrition Risk

Nutrition risk is any medical or health problem which can be corrected or lessened by proper amounts and types of food intake. Examples of nutrition risk are:
◾Low iron levels
◾Insufficient growth, i.e. low weight for age, low weight for height
◾Premature delivery
◾Inadequate dietary intake (types or amounts of food)

Eligibility Requirements
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Old 09-07-2013, 10:01 PM
 
3,762 posts, read 5,399,312 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
That's unfair. Most 19 year olds aren't mature enough to be parents.
I knew a 15 year old who was a mature parent.
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