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Old 09-08-2013, 07:47 PM
 
5,290 posts, read 5,198,877 times
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Demanded? Do you know who the adult is?
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:02 PM
 
Location: Lauderdale by the Sea, Florida
384 posts, read 592,448 times
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I would hazard a guess that your daughter just wants the boots for the brand name. If you know how to sew, you could just buy some caramel-colored boots with fur and then sew in the words "UGG Australia" on the side in brown thread. Or you could give in to her demand for either an iPhone or UGGs, but not both. Life is full of choices, really.
I never really understood why parents who can afford these type of goods choose to withhold them from their children. I mean, you don't have to buy them everything, but come on.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:10 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,499 posts, read 53,807,259 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LPDAL View Post
I would hazard a guess that your daughter just wants the boots for the brand name. If you know how to sew, you could just buy some caramel-colored boots with fur and then sew in the words "UGG Australia" on the side in brown thread. Or you could give in to her demand for either an iPhone or UGGs, but not both. Life is full of choices, really.
I never really understood why parents who can afford these type of goods choose to withhold them from their children. I mean, you don't have to buy them everything, but come on.
I can afford to buy my kids 10 of everything they want but that does not mean I'm going to do it. It's pretty shallow to think this is only about the money. It's about reigning in useless spending just to keep up with the Jones. It's about learning what really is important and it's about setting limits and priorities. A terrible precedent to set. Next it will be "everybody has their naval pierced and everybody got a new car on their 16th birthday and everybody is allowed to sleep with their boyfriend after the prom" and on and on it goes till it is too late to teach valuable life lessons.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:14 PM
 
3,762 posts, read 5,398,133 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JulieMom View Post
My daughter came home today and demanded that we start buying her name brands, claiming that "EVERYONE (emphasis added) has Uggs, iphones, etc." Is this just typical middle school behavior?
Start picking up some employment applications for her so she can afford to buy them with her own money.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:16 PM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,218,401 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LPDAL View Post
I would hazard a guess that your daughter just wants the boots for the brand name. If you know how to sew, you could just buy some caramel-colored boots with fur and then sew in the words "UGG Australia" on the side in brown thread. Or you could give in to her demand for either an iPhone or UGGs, but not both. Life is full of choices, really.
I never really understood why parents who can afford these type of goods choose to withhold them from their children. I mean, you don't have to buy them everything, but come on.
You are assuming things, when you don't know what she does, or does not buy her daughter. You are also assuming she is in the financial position to purchase these items.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:17 PM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,218,401 times
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Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
I can afford to buy my kids 10 of everything they want but that does not mean I'm going to do it. It's pretty shallow to think this is only about the money. It's about reigning in useless spending just to keep up with the Jones. It's about learning what really is important and it's about setting limits and priorities. A terrible precedent to set. Next it will be "everybody has their naval pierced and everybody got a new car on their 16th birthday and everybody is allowed to sleep with their boyfriend after the prom" and on and on it goes till it is too late to teach valuable life lessons.
Agreed! Sometimes it's better for kids to understand the benefit of being an individual over running with the herd as well.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:20 PM
 
Location: North America
14,204 posts, read 12,218,401 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by trishguard View Post
Start picking up some employment applications for her so she can afford to buy them with her own money.
Actually that isn't a bad idea really . While at her age she likely can't get a real job, but there are lots of odd jobs kids can do *raking leaves, gardening, offering to pick up groceries, babysitting, dogwalking*. Mom could also work out an incentive based program. Such as for every dollar her daughter earns *outside of allowance*, she can match it for whatever she wants to buy.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:22 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
24,012 posts, read 28,348,269 times
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The way I see it, middle school kids wanting the stuff that "everyone else" seems to have is pretty normal and nothing new. For my mom it was Pendleton skirts and cashmere twinsets, for me it was Ditto jeans and Baretrap platform shoes. The issue here is the "demanding". Sit down with her and discuss real costs of things. Give her options to attain them herself. Extra chores to earn money, packing her lunch instead of buying it etc. Don't dismiss her feelings, empower her to get what she wants herself. Put the responsibility on her.
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:46 PM
 
Location: Phoenix Arizona
725 posts, read 1,889,654 times
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Simply giving them "luxuries" such as an iphone is a bad idea. What ever happened to EARNING things in life?

That's the problem with society. It's all about having things handed to them just because. They go to college, get a degree and then expect a great job to just be given to them without really earning it by working from the bottom up. Giving a child an iphone with access to Facebook and the internet is a really, really bad idea and you are just giving her access to all sorts of problems that you have never even considered yet.

My 5 year old has already stated that when I get a new phone he wants my old phone. Granted he just wants it so he can continue to play his games on there but that is pretty much all it is going to be good for since when I get my new phone I plan on disconnecting the old phone. Kids have no business being on the internet unsupervised. Haven't you heard of on-line predators?
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Old 09-08-2013, 08:51 PM
 
13,975 posts, read 25,834,481 times
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If boots or a phone is needed, I would consider the choice my child wanted. If the price was too high, or if the item was merely a "want", I would tell them to wait for either Christmas or their birthday.

However, if the request was presented as a demand? Nope, they would get nothing.
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