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She has been grounded in the past for drinking. She has lost privilidges and had to earn them back (this is the second time she came home under the influence but we also found a bottle at one point too that she claimed belonged to a friend. Didn't buy it. Grounded her for two weeks.
She's 15 and drinking and you grounded her from parties for TWO WEEKS? She should not be permitted to go to parties for a REALLY LONG TIME and she should not be permitted to earn back that privilege.
I don't let my kids go to parties in high school unless they are supervised by people I know well. I also do not let my kids get rides from other teens until they are a bit older. If they want to go somewhere at when they do not have a license they need a ride from my husband or I, or another parent that we know. We make contact with the other parent to make sure we know the plan.
My kids are popular and are invited to many social events despite the fact that we do not allow them to run from party to party. Your daughter needs to spend time around a more wholesome bunch of friends.
I don't know about the other stuff, but the NHS has a specific code of conduct. If she ends up with a criminal record, she may be ineligible for NHS.
Yes, but that's a big "if" at this point. It hasn't yet happened. She's been arrested not convicted. That's my point.
I cannot imagine how drunk one has to be to mouth off to a police officer enough to get arrested.
And as for her license, she was arrested for disorderly conduct, and as far as I know, was not given an MIP or anything ( but I'm going from memory, too lazy to look back). So, her license may not even be in jeopardy - by the law anyway. It wouldn't even be a consideration in my home. Granted, I was never in this position with either of my kids when they were teens, but I imagine my position would be...you've got 2+ years until you're 18...make the best of them and we'll see if we are interested in placing you on our insurance policy at that point.
Last edited by maciesmom; 11-06-2013 at 02:21 PM..
Are you basing this on any real, concrete information? Or what you've heard from various people? Have you actually spoken to her school? To the lawyer? To anyone at all?
Or just use Google and find out what the law is in the state OP lives in. In California she would loose her driver's license for a year (so she couldn't get it till 17), but I was caught drinking when I was 19 in Missouri and all that happened was I had to pay a $100 fine and pay to take a drugs and alcohol abuse class. I still had my driver's license, and as long as I didn't get another MIP before turning 21 the incident would stay off my record. It never affected my being able to drive, and never affected my ability to get a job.
Although I wasn't in high school, and I know high school athletes all sign a code of conduct. Your daughter is a minor, so you probably also signed this agreement. Did you bother reading what it said, or did you just sign? You and your daughter should have both known the consequences of her actions.
OP do you know the MIP law in your state? Even though she wasn't in actual possession of alcohol at the time, a lot of laws classify your body as a container for alcohol. So any alcohol in the system is considered being in possession of alcohol.
Everyone is telling the OP what could happen, and what probably happens in their state. The OP needs to find out the laws of her state. I would do that before hiring a lawyer. If all the daughter has to do is pay a small fine, it is not worth the cost of a lawyer. Save the lawyer fees for if/when the daughter gets caught a second and third time.
Although since the daughter was also mouthing off to the cops, she might be charged with more then just the MIP. The OP hasn't mentioned what her daughter is being charged for, so that makes a big difference in what is going to happen.
Or just use Google and find out what the law is in the state OP lives in. In California she would loose her driver's license for a year (so she couldn't get it till 17), but I was caught drinking when I was 19 in Missouri and all that happened was I had to pay a $100 fine and pay to take a drugs and alcohol abuse class. I still had my driver's license, and as long as I didn't get another MIP before turning 21 the incident would stay off my record. It never affected my being able to drive, and never affected my ability to get a job.
Although I wasn't in high school, and I know high school athletes all sign a code of conduct. Your daughter is a minor, so you probably also signed this agreement. Did you bother reading what it said, or did you just sign? You and your daughter should have both known the consequences of her actions.
OP do you know the MIP law in your state? Even though she wasn't in actual possession of alcohol at the time, a lot of laws classify your body as a container for alcohol. So any alcohol in the system is considered being in possession of alcohol.
Everyone is telling the OP what could happen, and what probably happens in their state. The OP needs to find out the laws of her state. I would do that before hiring a lawyer. If all the daughter has to do is pay a small fine, it is not worth the cost of a lawyer. Save the lawyer fees for if/when the daughter gets caught a second and third time.
Although since the daughter was also mouthing off to the cops, she might be charged with more then just the MIP. The OP hasn't mentioned what her daughter is being charged for, so that makes a big difference in what is going to happen.
I'm not even sure she received an MIP (see my edit to my post above).... my understanding was she was arrested for disorderly conduct or something....
Hauling a child off to the police SOBER (drunk makes no sense at all because she couldn't possibly get anything positive out of the encounter) would be a last ditch effort.
My god. Only the parent who sees her child as a special snowflake expects the COPS to give her child a positive experience.
Here's the thing: the cops aren't there to teach your child life lessons. (That's your job.) They are there to enforce things like..... underage drinking laws. A law YOUR child chose to break. Again. You expect the cops to provide a positive encounter (drunk or sober) for your 15-year old? A 15-year old who supposed to come home from a trip to the police department saying, "Gosh. Those nice police showed me the error of my ways. I guess I'll stop pouring tequila down my throat." is so special snowflake-ish I can barely breathe.
Last edited by DewDropInn; 11-06-2013 at 02:33 PM..
Yes, but that's a big "if" at this point. It hasn't yet happened. She's been arrested not convicted. That's my point.
I cannot imagine how drunk one has to be to mouth off to a police officer enough to get arrested.
And as for her license, she was arrested for disorderly conduct, and as far as I know, was not given an MIP or anything. So, her license may not even be in jeopardy - by the law anyway. It wouldn't even be a consideration in my home.
She was drunk, of course she got an MIP. A minor can get an MIP even if they only blow a .02, so if she was drunk enough to start mouthing off to the police she was above the legal limit for minors.
I'm not even sure she received an MIP (see my edit to my post above).... my understanding was she was arrested for disorderly conduct or something....
I doubt she was drunk and mouthing off to the police and they let her go with just a disorderly conduct. If that is the case, then OP better be thanking her lucky stars that the police went so easy on her daughter.
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