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Old 12-13-2007, 08:50 PM
 
Location: Lexington, MA
250 posts, read 630,313 times
Reputation: 463

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Note to participants in this thread:

The topic is NOT whether to spank the child or not. I think there have been a number of topics, over the past few months, in which that has been discussed. And, if you want to discuss it some more, feel free to start your own thread. This thread is about a 6 year-old kid having a tantrum at his birthday party.

Fwiw, summers, I wouldn't be overly alarmed at a 6 year-old having a tantrum at his party. He probably wanted to be the one to break the pinata and probably felt cheated when the bigger kid broke it first. And there's no reasoning with a 6 year-old over that.... at least not much at the time it happens.

But I CAN tell you, I have a kid that is diagnosed as bipolar, and when he has tantrums, they are absolutely out of control... he cannot control himself. It's not a choice, but a compulsion, and about the best we can do is to just not "buy" into it and either remove him from his surroundings, or remove his surroundings from him. But if the kid has a mood disorder like mine does, there is nothing you or anyone else could do to stop that tantrum.

 
Old 12-13-2007, 08:56 PM
 
Location: New York
371 posts, read 1,331,712 times
Reputation: 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnycakes View Post
Note to participants in this thread:

The topic is NOT whether to spank the child or not. I think there have been a number of topics, over the past few months, in which that has been discussed. And, if you want to discuss it some more, feel free to start your own thread. This thread is about a 6 year-old kid having a tantrum at his birthday party.

Fwiw, summers, I wouldn't be overly alarmed at a 6 year-old having a tantrum at his party. He probably wanted to be the one to break the pinata and probably felt cheated when the bigger kid broke it first. And there's no reasoning with a 6 year-old over that.... at least not much at the time it happens.

But I CAN tell you, I have a kid that is diagnosed as bipolar, and when he has tantrums, they are absolutely out of control... he cannot control himself. It's not a choice, but a compulsion, and about the best we can do is to just not "buy" into it and either remove him from his surroundings, or remove his surroundings from him. But if the kid has a mood disorder like mine does, there is nothing you or anyone else could do to stop that tantrum.
God bless you Johnnycakes!! I was "trying" very hard, as were many others, that tantrums (in most cases) are not a willful thing. I applaud you and thanks for trying to get back on topic. As for Ms. Summers, I believe she's had her fill of "helpful" responses.
 
Old 12-13-2007, 11:02 PM
 
Location: Kennesaw, Georgia
4 posts, read 11,484 times
Reputation: 12
I don't follow....When is it acceptable for a child to behave in a manner less than respectable and polite to his elders and peers? "Did you punish him? or "Did you pretend with the child everything is okay?" Regardless, to if he believed since it was his party he would give the pinata the final blow or if he felt he would just plainly have another chance to try he needs to understand-----Someone will win, someone will lose and most importantly he has to share. Please do not allow him to grow up believing the world resolves around him. These or his formative years not his adult years. Also, please tell me you beat his behind and not only did you demand an apology for yourself but your guess as well.

Single Mom with the grace of God (did well) and Stong parents believe IF YOU SPARE THE ROD YOU SPOIL THE CHILD!
 
Old 12-13-2007, 11:30 PM
 
Location: New York
371 posts, read 1,331,712 times
Reputation: 243
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarlaP View Post
I don't follow....When is it acceptable for a child to behave in a manner less than respectable and polite to his elders and peers? "Did you punish him? or "Did you pretend with the child everything is okay?" Regardless, to if he believed since it was his party he would give the pinata the final blow or if he felt he would just plainly have another chance to try he needs to understand-----Someone will win, someone will lose and most importantly he has to share. Please do not allow him to grow up believing the world resolves around him. These or his formative years not his adult years. Also, please tell me you beat his behind and not only did you demand an apology for yourself but your guess as well.

Single Mom with the grace of God (did well) and Stong parents believe IF YOU SPARE THE ROD YOU SPOIL THE CHILD!
Where did you crawl out of?? Go back please and leave this poor woman alone. I swear I am going to request that this thread be closed because I believe the attacks are just out of hand!!
 
Old 12-13-2007, 11:39 PM
 
Location: Camberville
7,190 posts, read 8,940,727 times
Reputation: 8807
If I was spanked every time I had a bad day and had a meltdown (which still happens to this day) then I would have no butt left to speak of!

I remember at my 6th birthday party, we had it in Burger King (there was nowhere else in town!) and this guy dressed as a clown came out. He went around asking all the party guests if they were the birthday girl. Now, most kids would think this was funny and say "ME! ME!" Oh, but not me. I was SO upset that I started crying. Then I was embarrassed that I was crying over something stupid (but still very upset), so I "hid" under the table. Parties and birthdays are very exhausting for kids and 6 years old is still very young in terms of that sort of thing. I was a very well behaved child but for some reason, that whole event was just too much for me. I was also, and still am, very quiet and serious so being around a ton of people can be very physically and emotionally draining to me even now. Even at 20 years old, I rarely spend much time at parties or large gatherings of people because they make me so cranky.

I don't remember what my punishment was for that, or if I even had one. I certainly wasn't spanked as my parents knew what an ineffective mode of operation that was. Now I'm not a self indulgent, spoiled adult and I certainly don't hide under tables anymore when I'm flustered! Kids have the same emotions as adults but unlike adults, they have NO idea how to handle it (ie. counting to 10, going to a happy place, a nice tall margarita...) and at 6 years old, that handling mechanism still hasn't really kicked in yet. So no pinata next year is a good plan!
 
Old 12-13-2007, 11:44 PM
 
Location: Lexington, MA
250 posts, read 630,313 times
Reputation: 463
Seems like people just cannot keep from chastising this woman for not beating her kid, in spite of being admonished to stay on topic. Thread closed.
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