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Old 08-06-2014, 08:04 PM
 
Location: here
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Discipline and Depression

"But moms with older children – toddlers and preschoolers in particular – may show all the signs of depression but rarely notice it as such."

"Since depression makes every irritant more intense it can make your tolerance for your child’s behavior extremely low."

Thoughts? Experiences? I totally experienced this. I think I was depressed for 7 years after my first was born. I think the reason it took so long to realize it is because I was functioning. I had to, right? I had kids depending on me. I thought when a person was depressed they stayed in bed all day. Fortunately I did finally realize it addressed the problem.
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Old 08-12-2014, 06:19 PM
 
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I agree! Dads too should be included in this. Part of this is a high expectation that parents have to raise a perfectly disciplined child. I think most children turn out fine with just some disciplining. Also with the number of celebrity moms who do it all (thin, dressed up, make 'healthy meals', workout etc.etc..) women try to attain such similar heights and since they do not have the physical or moral support to succeed in it and still raise the perfect child they can easily fall into depression.
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Old 08-12-2014, 06:42 PM
 
Location: Raleigh NC
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I caught mine earlier. I could not be the mom I wanted to be. I was catching myself near tears in the grocery store for no particular reason. Started taking Prozac when my baby was 2 or so and kept it up all through my next pregnancy and still taking meds after 15 years.

I grew up with a seriously depressed mom. She was emotionally unavailable to me most of the time and angry the rest of the time. She got mad at the dumbest stuff. I thought she hated me. There was no way I was putting my kids through that. I felt my husband was depressed also, but he refused to admit and get help. If he had, we might still be married. He found it easier just to blame me.
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Old 08-12-2014, 06:59 PM
 
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I believe I suffered from it as well. What really helped was coming to C-D though I mostly read posts than ask for help. I learned to set up little goals for my child which occasionally (well more than that) got interrupted by toddler behavior. That's cool. I stopped setting inappropriate expectations. In some ways, life is simpler but the connections and life lessons are deeper.
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Old 08-12-2014, 07:26 PM
 
Location: here
24,472 posts, read 28,750,429 times
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I don't think, for me, it was the expectation that I had to raise a perfect child. I think it was the repetitive guiding and disciplining and feeling like I was getting nowhere. Nothing seemed to work. Looking back, I think it worked over time, but in the moment, I felt like the situation was hopeless.
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