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My son who turned 18 on July 26 says he is going to take me to court because I took his computer because he didn't come home at all one night.
When he took his computer to a friends house. He deleted all the files and reinstall the programs to get around our password.
How would you handle this?
Tell him he can have a "normal" house when he gets his own.
Define "normal"
My ds, 17 likes to complain to anyone who will believe his BS---he complains our house is a mess, although he doesn't do jack around here, won't even put a dish in the dishwasher without it turning into a major battle. I am disabled, although he says I'm faking it----I can't do heavy work, like scrub tubs, toilets, floors, etc, so, even though our budget is limited, we hire a cleaning service. He won't even get his rear out of the bed when the cleaning service comes! He literally lays in the bed while the cleaning service cleans around him, then complains the house is a mess. He complains there's ants in his room, although if he cleaned up the old food, wrappers, spilled coke, etc, maybe the ants wouldn't be coming inside.
We should go to counseling? Did that---counselor told me I shouldn't touch his room, let it pile up if that's how he wants it, but then the ants crawl all over the house. Then, I've had social services out here responding to his complaints the house is unsanitary I told them that was the state-appointed counselor's advice, let the room fester----go argue with themselves!
We've been thinking of busting open our retirement plan, buy him a crappy mobile home, some crappy furniture, a can of Raid and hasta la vista
Last edited by MaryleeII; 08-09-2014 at 09:30 PM..
I've had similar issues with my DS for years. I'm literally counting the days until he turns 18.
In the meantime, OP, just ignore the threats. I've found police usually do nothing, anyways. I used to scare more easily than I now do. My motto----don't look for trouble, let trouble find you. Just for your own peace of mind, you might want to consult a lawyer, but I wouldn't. They charge a fortune, and their answer is '.....hmmmmm.....it depends, I have to look into it" Of course, the can't give you a clear answer as to exactly what will happen in an uncertain future, but they usually don't even tell you the possibilities, your rights, responsibilities, etc.
Like I say, don't sweat it. There's nothing they can or will do, anyways.
I've called police on my DS when he got drunk, high, and punched holes in the walls----holes as big as a shoe, at first that's what they thought it was. Police just sneared at me and said, well.....its his house, too.
I am also disabled, DS has physically attacked me several times, broken arm, bruises, again, police think its some sort of joke, even told me well, if I felt unsafe here I could leave.
Ok, what I'm trying to say is, if it doesn't work one way, it doesn't work the other. Most of the time police want to keep their crime statistics down, their govt funding, grants, raises, etc, etc are all tied to their statistics. So, they try to keep as much off the books as possible.
My advice----change the locks, and get on with your own life
I'm so sorry that your son is so violent and the police have not been helpful. That's not the situation OP describes. OP's son (unless she's leaving far more important things out) is just a bratty teenager. As far as changing the locks, that's illegal in most states; OP would have to evict him. I would not do that with a college-bound teen for merely being a brat.
Did you give it to him? If so its his computer under law and he has adult rights. If you don't agree with his behavior; you can kick him out but can't take stuff that his by legal right. He is past age of emancipation meaning not under control regards parent /child any more.
Uh, the "Gifts to Minors" act is intended for large monetary gifts, not laptop computers.
Yes, I know. But we're getting overly technical here and the laws can apply to personal property. Moreover, many parents will give their children "gifts" of the ability to use property (computers, cars, etc.) with conditions. That doesn't mean the kid owns the property. Even if junior was already 18 when the gift was given, this would be the case.
Yes, I know. But we're getting overly technical here and the laws can apply to personal property.
I don't think that's true in the case of something like a laptop. The laws you're speaking of are basically in place for tax reasons, btw.
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I told them that was the state-appointed counselor's advice, let the room fester----go argue with themselves!
