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Old 08-15-2014, 06:23 PM
 
1,167 posts, read 1,042,028 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell View Post
Well I agree that if it's a trivial amount of money - it wouldn't be a deciding factor. However, if we're talking $900/month vs $550/month from someone with great recommendations - that may be a breaking point.

I won't be uppity, but don't look at me eating my $2 burger that I like and tell me how I'm eating an inferior burger that's a heaping pile of garbage compared to your $2.75 burger. Your $2.75 burger may have some great characteristics, but it doesn't make my $2 burger bad.
And as a parent, they may choose the $900 option because it's 5 minutes from their home, enroute to work, half a mile from a hospital and with someone trained as an EMT in the building, have a huge outdoor play space, offer better meals, open at 7 and close at 6, with a 1:3 minder to child ratio, versus the $550 option that is 15 minutes from home, away from work, adding on 30+ minutes to the morning drop off/commute and again in the afternoon, with hours from 7:30 to 5:30 charging penalties or excess after 5:30, they only provide some meals requiring you to pack something for your child, they have a 1:5 minder to child ratio, and are on a busy road with a paved and fenced lot as the only outdoor space.

It all adds up, and sometimes, even though the cheaper option isn't bad, it's just not the best option for that family.

 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:28 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,149 posts, read 22,152,810 times
Reputation: 35614
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell View Post
Well I agree that if it's a trivial amount of money - it wouldn't be a deciding factor. However, if we're talking $900/month vs $550/month from someone with great recommendations - that may be a breaking point.

I won't be uppity, but don't look at me eating my $2 burger that I like and tell me how I'm eating an inferior burger that's a heaping pile of garbage compared to your $2.75 burger. Your $2.75 burger may have some great characteristics, but it doesn't make my $2 burger bad.
Eat what you like - but aren't you looking at those who eat a pricier burger with disdain and condescention? You are no better than those who you feel are looking down on you. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder. Let it go. Worry about yourself and your family. Not what everyone else is doing or you think they are thinking. You'll be happier.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:29 PM
 
11,411 posts, read 6,465,069 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kibbiekat View Post
It is ALL highly variable! You don't know whether or not you are going to have a petite little girl who eats like a bird, or a big athletic boy who eats like a horse. Other things like child care vary widely BY GEOGRAPHIC AREA. There is also a world of choice between good will and a boutique. People generally spend what they can afford. I'm not going to choose a cheap baptist day care center if I can afford a reputable non-religious one (see economics forum thread). I do shop at goodwill from time to time, but I'm not going to buy all of our clothes there because I don't have to. I do live in a nice suburb with good schools because I can. I'm not going to aspire to mediocrity if I can do better for my kids.

Really, what is your point anyway? Why do you care? People are born into poverty every day. They grow up one day at a time just like any other kid.
How much they eat is of lesser importance - WHAT you feed them is more important. Are you cooking very filling/affordable foods at home or are you eating at restaurants 5-6x/week? The staple foods like pasta, rice, beans, corn, potatos, etc are pretty cheap and filling. Fruits are often cheaper snacks than prepacked sweets.

The cheap Baptist day care was just an example. Plenty of other non-religious day cares exist which are comparable in price. Granted, to me, religious affiliation doesn't matter too much - especially for infants. Most of the workers are no more or less religious than those working in a non-church day care. But that's beside the point.

I wont knock anyone for living in the burbs with good schools, but I also wont knock someone that's perfectly content with living in a working class neighborhood with just average schools. I believe both people can raise well adjusted/happy children.

What's my point? My point is that some people like to turn their nose up at anything that is below their "standards" for raising a child. Goodwill....uhh, what kind of parent does that? In home day care...uhh, you are potentially harming your child. Working class neighborhood....uhh, you should work a little harder and try to get to a better area. Oh, so you have the ability to do better, but you're satisfied...WHY are you "skimping".
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:33 PM
 
11,411 posts, read 6,465,069 times
Reputation: 6168
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Eat what you like - but aren't you looking at those who eat a pricier burger with disdain and condescention? You are no better than those who you feel are looking down on you. You seem to have a chip on your shoulder. Let it go. Worry about yourself and your family. Not what everyone else is doing or you think they are thinking. You'll be happier.
NO way. I don't care if other people spend more. It's their money. I do care when people insinuate that by spending less I am somehow doing a disservice to the child or harming them in some way. It seems that some are stuck on the "spend as much as you can...don't skimp" mindset and anyone that deviates from this way of thinking is somehow less loving or not fulfilling their role as a parent.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,149 posts, read 22,152,810 times
Reputation: 35614
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell View Post
How much they eat is of lesser importance - WHAT you feed them is more important. Are you cooking very filling/affordable foods at home or are you eating at restaurants 5-6x/week? The staple foods like pasta, rice, beans, corn, potatos, etc are pretty cheap and filling. Fruits are often cheaper snacks than prepacked sweets.

The cheap Baptist day care was just an example. Plenty of other non-religious day cares exist which are comparable in price. Granted, to me, religious affiliation doesn't matter too much - especially for infants. Most of the workers are no more or less religious than those working in a non-church day care. But that's beside the point.

I wont knock anyone for living in the burbs with good schools, but I also wont knock someone that's perfectly content with living in a working class neighborhood with just average schools. I believe both people can raise well adjusted/happy children.

What's my point? My point is that some people like to turn their nose up at anything that is below their "standards" for raising a child. Goodwill....uhh, what kind of parent does that? In home day care...uhh, you are potentially harming your child. Working class neighborhood....uhh, you should work a little harder and try to get to a better area. Oh, so you have the ability to do better, but you're satisfied...WHY are you "skimping".
And some other people like to turn their nose up at people who spend money in ways they don't understand or can't afford themselves. Guess what? It's none of your business how other people spend their money.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:35 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,149 posts, read 22,152,810 times
Reputation: 35614
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell View Post
NO way. I don't care if other people spend more. It's their money. I do care when people insinuate that by spending less I am somehow doing a disservice to the child or harming them in some way. It seems that some are stuck on the "spend as much as you can...don't skimp" mindset and anyone that deviates from this way of thinking is somehow less loving or not fulfilling their role as a parent.
Who has said that?
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:44 PM
 
8,546 posts, read 5,279,681 times
Reputation: 9115
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell View Post
NO way. I don't care if other people spend more. It's their money. I do care when people insinuate that by spending less I am somehow doing a disservice to the child or harming them in some way. It seems that some are stuck on the "spend as much as you can...don't skimp" mindset and anyone that deviates from this way of thinking is somehow less loving or not fulfilling their role as a parent.
Hmm, I have been in both threads and have only seen one or two comments where people turned their noses up for things like, shopping at Goodwill or not fully funding a child's college education. Most people have been pretty middle of the road and have pretty much been saying that they try to provide the best they can afford for their kids.

Last edited by MissTerri; 08-15-2014 at 06:53 PM..
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:52 PM
 
11,411 posts, read 6,465,069 times
Reputation: 6168
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
And some other people like to turn their nose up at people who spend money in ways they don't understand or can't afford themselves. Guess what? It's none of your business how other people spend their money.
This discussion should not offend you. We are having a discussion, not assigning jobs of maintaining other people's business. As I said, I don't care others spend their money. I don't look down at those that do less (unless they put a child in obvious harm) and I don't don't at those that go over and beyond. Everyone relax.
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:53 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,149 posts, read 22,152,810 times
Reputation: 35614
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Who has said that?
***crickets***
 
Old 08-15-2014, 06:53 PM
 
11,411 posts, read 6,465,069 times
Reputation: 6168
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Who has said that?
For arguments sake, lets assume someone in this world has that mindset. This is more of a hypothetical rather than an attack on a specific individuals viewpoint. Capiche?
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