Has anybody ever sent a kid to their room without any supper? (son, 12 yr old)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had to laugh at this too Dew. I threaten to send my daughter to bed without her supper (which she got anyway) and I'm a tyrant. And we need family therapy because DH and I had different approach to this problem. And daughter will end up gorked for life because I chose not to eat supper with the family this time.
I am OK with how it all played out and I won't be looking at this thread any more or responding. Thanks to those who understand . I repped where I could.
I had to laugh at this too Dew. I threaten to send my daughter to bed without her supper (which she got anyway) and I'm a tyrant. And we need family therapy because DH and I had different approach to this problem. And daughter will end up gorked for life because I chose not to eat supper with the family this time.
I am OK with how it all played out and I won't be looking at this thread any more or responding. Thanks to those who understand . I repped where I could.
No...you are not bring a tyrant over that...and I agree it's a bit of extreme word...but the rest of it? You are repeating some dysfunctional behavior whether you see it or not.
Each case should be taken for itself....somethings work for some kids...other times things like this will just make matters 100 times worse. Parents have to examine why they are doing something. ..is it to teach and work towards the goal of a teen being a constructive and positive member of society or just to prove they are in charge.
It is true that different kids call for different actions, however, I think that Rosemonds methods are ONLY good for a child who is so rebellious that you can't even have a conversation with him. When it gets to the point that the parent has no respect and no relationship with the child you have to take drastic measures. I consider this type of thing drastic. I would never use it for a regular kid who just needs some redirection, because, personally, I think that would be treating a human being more like an object that you owned rather than an individual. And I don't think that's good for anyone regardless of personality type.
It is true that different kids call for different actions, however, I think that Rosemonds methods are ONLY good for a child who is so rebellious that you can't even have a conversation with him. When it gets to the point that the parent has no respect and no relationship with the child you have to take drastic measures. I consider this type of thing drastic. I would never use it for a regular kid who just needs some redirection, because, personally, I think that would be treating a human being more like an object that you owned rather than an individual. And I don't think that's good for anyone regardless of personality type.
In my friends case..that was the point her 13 year old son had gotten to....lots of issues hit at the same time (she left an abusive spouse. ..after the ass got out after some minor jail time he egged his son on the make her life hell by proxie..they moved etc etc)....it was an perfect storm of problems.
The idea that this should be done for a bit of back talk at dinner is ridiculous.
You could have her eat alone at the big dining room table if she likes going to her room too much or thinks having a meal in her room is special.
The separation from the family is the message.
Right! I've done that when my daughter was younger and talked back one time too many: I had her eat her dinner in the pantry by herself and had her reorganize it while she was in there.
I had to laugh at this too Dew. I threaten to send my daughter to bed without her supper (which she got anyway) and I'm a tyrant.
Which is because your husband reasoned with her and got her to apologize, so you "agreed" to give her supper. I'm sorry, but parent-child relationships are not to be handled like political grandstanding. She's not Putin, and you're not Obama. The threat to withhold supper is what I am referring to as abuse. Perhaps you're not an abusive parent in general. I don't know you anyway. But that particular threat doesn't have any place in a family. Withhold wants, not needs; as another poster suggested, this would mean taking away her cellphone, TV, etc.
Different things work on different kids. For example, when I was that age, all my mom had to do was threaten to take away my video games or my computer and I knew she meant business. For minor things, you got extra chores. For example, I am one of 7 kids. Every one of us had a daily chore assigned to us. If we didn't do it, we got stuck with that chore for a week straight while our siblings didn't have to do it. And my siblings would help enforce it too - they liked if you forgot 'cause then they had less chores :P I remember once my mother completely emptied my brother's room. The only thing he had in it was a bed and his clothes by the time she'd finished.
None of us ever just outright refused to listen though. I do know one thing, though. Don't ignore your daughter's behavior. I have a sister who is much much younger than me and is the only kid still at home. My mom always let her snarky remarks slide because she has a disability (not mental) and now people can barely tolerate to be around her because she always has a saracastic, mean tone in her voice. She's even been banned from staying over at my house because she's so rude and my DH finally had enough of her behavior.
when i was young, i got sent to bed without supper so many times. i hid food under the bed. dad knew because every once in a while. new food be added under the bed.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
