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Old 09-12-2014, 07:30 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,100,171 times
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Is It a Crime to Raise a Killer?

A family in NJ is suing the parents of their daughter's killer. They want to create Autumn's Law to hold parents financially responsible for raising killers and not protecting society.

The parents of the killer were divorced after well documented domestic violence. The father lived a few towns away and rarely saw his children. The mother and school were trying to help the killer. It's well know that parents of troubled children often have a difficult time getting their children help. He wasn't a even a suspect until his mother herself went to the police when she saw something on his facebook page that made her worry he was involved.

The victims parents describe the town as safe, where everyone knows everyone. Their daughter was 12 and last seen at 12:30 pm. Her father didn't wonder about her whereabouts until 8 pm. After she didn't respond to texts, he called the police after 9:30 pm. He didn't worry about his 12 year old daughter's whereabouts for 9 hours!

Since everyone knows everyone in this small town (their words) and the killer's house was only 14 houses away, the daughter's parents had to have known there was an undesirable family in the neighborhood. There were 700 pages of police logs about the domestic violence during the marriage and other petty crimes of the children. I would have forbidden my children from going to a house like that, and they would have obeyed me. Even though my children had free reign of the neighborhood, they always let me know where they were, and they were required to check in regularly. This was a requirement to keep the independence I allowed them to have.

If Autumn's Law becomes a reality, where does parental responsibility begin and end? We have the mother of a murderer who was trying to get him help. We have the father of a murder who was absent, but that absence was probably a good thing since he probably abused his children when was present. What about the parents who truly raise murderers via incredible abuse and neglect? Are those parents only responsible for what their children do as minors or are they responsible for when they become serial killing adults? And what about the parents who did everything right and their child still grew up to be a murderer? Don't the parents of victims have a responsibility to ensure their safety too?

I can't imagine their grief, but I think their lawsuit is misplaced and risks setting a scary precedent.

Last edited by Hopes; 09-12-2014 at 07:43 AM..
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Old 09-12-2014, 09:48 AM
 
Location: Texas
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I am disgusted by the lawsuit. I understand that they are hurting, and hurting deeply, but this type of lawsuit is completely uncalled for unless there was gross negligence (leaving small children alone with unlocked loaded guns) or the parent participated/egged on the child. This case doesn't seem to have that.

You have a single mom who managed to extricate herself and her children from an abusive relationship. A son with learning disabilities and emotional issues who was getting help through the school. So basically the other parents are blaming this mom for a) staying too long in a bad relationsip and b) not knowing her son would kill someone.

The best parents in the world could raise a killer - a child born with mental illness or perhaps just born without a conscience.

I hope this lawsuit gets thrown out of court.
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Old 09-12-2014, 10:01 AM
 
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The father keeps misplacing his guilt. He initially blamed the police for not searching for her sooner, but she was dead before he even called the police. Now he's blaming the boy's parents. I know he's hurting, but his solution to overcome it via trying to create this law is harmful to society.

The sad thing is there are parents who feel the way he does. If he's going to blame the boy's parents, his responsibility to watch is child is relevant. But people will say that's blaming the father when it's not. The boy is responsible. Nobody else. As hard as it is to wrap his mind around that in his grief, it sickens me that he's using the court system as therapy.
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Old 09-12-2014, 10:53 AM
 
Location: Northern California
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The only one responsible for the girl's death is the person who killed her, unless there is some other evidence that suddenly emerges.

Blaming the boy's parents is misplacing the blame, and so is blaming the girl's parents (which seems to be happening in the first post with the "they should have known there was an undesirable family" and "he didn't worry about his daughter for 9 hours").
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Old 09-12-2014, 11:05 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by passwithoutatrace View Post
Blaming the boy's parents is misplacing the blame, and so is blaming the girl's parents (which seems to be happening in the first post with the "they should have known there was an undesirable family" and "he didn't worry about his daughter for 9 hours").
I'm not blaming the girl's father. The only person to blame is the boy who killed his daughter. I'm pointing out that if he's going to hold the boy's parents accountable, he should also hold himself accountable for where he failed that day. It's obvious he feels guilty about what happened, and he's blaming the boy's parents to lessen his own self-imposed guilt.
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Old 09-12-2014, 03:51 PM
 
Location: So Ca
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From the link in the OP, “Where were their parents?” grieving families asked after Columbine and Newtown, after Isla Vista and Troutdale..."

I used to think that parents had a role in raising a child who kills, until I read about Eric Harris, one of the Columbine killers. I think that in most of these cases, there's a biological or genetic component to psychopathy.

Also, if you watched any of the interviews with the father of the Isla Vista killer, he apparently never, ever suspected that his son was capable of murder. He knew that he was troubled and probably suffering from a mental illness, but did not ever imagine that his son could kill anyone (much less six people).
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Old 09-14-2014, 01:29 AM
 
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I sort of agree with the father that families of murders should bare some responsibility/consequence. This case is really bizarre. If I remember the case right, she was in contact with two boys. I don't remember if they were friends or brothers. She was eventually killed for her bike. I don't understand how her online activities weren't monitored. I don't understand how she wasn't taught you don't just met people you met online. Not justifying what was done to her at all, but her family didn't handle any thing right. While I think they are saddened by her death, I think they're out for money. I think the mother threatened some type of lawsuit when it happened and I remember reading her uncle did, too.
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Old 09-14-2014, 08:25 AM
 
8,546 posts, read 5,277,499 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
I can't imagine their grief, but I think their lawsuit is misplaced and risks setting a scary precedent.
I agree. I can understand that the parents of the murdered girl are very emotional and angry but I think the anger is misplaced when it shifts focus from the killer to the killer's parents. Parents play a role in how their kids turn out, but certainly not the only role. They can't be held responsible in this type of way. I agree that it does set a scary precedent.
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:42 AM
 
Location: NYC
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Back in ancient China, they can kill the entire extended family for the crimes of one person. Yes it was extreme but maybe they had a point. Perhaps your entire genetic line is suspect. On a more serious note, I don't think the parents should be punished. Even if they were negligent, they didn't intentionally raise a killer. But I do think human society on the whole has to tackle the uncomfortable issue of dealing with killers. I really don't think there is a need to reform them. We have enough people in the world. Killers are broken people and society should purge them without remorse.
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Old 09-17-2014, 03:27 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post

The victims parents describe the town as safe, where everyone knows everyone.

bahahaahahahaha. the most drama happens in small towns because "everyone knows everyone". i don't see why you'd ever want to want to raise a kid in a small town...reciepe for disaster and mental trauma. also it is widely known that small town teens use the most drugs because there is nothing to do for miles.
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