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Old 09-20-2014, 12:57 PM
 
15,745 posts, read 13,176,204 times
Reputation: 19641

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
If you can share your experience as a mandated reporter, zenapple and others can share their experiences that resulted from the actions of mandated reporters.




Where did you get the idea she was minimally inconvenienced for one day? The incident occurred early in August and CPS didn't clear her case until last week. That's 6 weeks of being afraid a child might be taken away.
Because I read her blog. They interviewed her ONCE. She never said they didn't allow her to leave town, or
did anything other than talk to her and her kids in person once, and called her husband over the phone.

Minimal.

Just because paper work takes time to move doesn't mean she was any more inconvenienced that she claimed herself.

Six weeks? Where do you get that? Make things up much?

According to twitter they got home from vacation on August 17th.

https://twitter.com/haikumama

Child was brought home from playing in the park alone on the 18th, it was several days later CPS called and interviewed them, and she was officially cleared on the 9th (despite being cleared well before that). The whole CPS involvement wasn't even half of six weeks. The need to constantly overdramatize the situation with made up details is ridiculous.
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Old 09-20-2014, 12:58 PM
 
15,745 posts, read 13,176,204 times
Reputation: 19641
Quote:
Originally Posted by zenapple View Post
Well, we'll just agree to disagree, then. I try to see where our points of view are common rather than where they differ, though. We're both happy that CPS exists to help children. We're both happy that the general public cared about the well-being of that particular child. We're both glad the system worked and the investigation was closed without further incident, after they determined her children were fine. Let's just leave it at that.
Agreed. And I am truly sorry for what happened to you and your family. It shouldn't have happened.
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Old 09-20-2014, 01:47 PM
 
Location: Central Texas
19,884 posts, read 36,393,146 times
Reputation: 21321
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
I would not approach someone as clearly out of control with anger as that father and question his parenting even with as simple a question as you posed. It could escalate wildly, and put his daughter in even greater harm. To this day I don't know who actually called the police, but I am also very grateful they did.

And if you choose not to intervene in a park with an unsupervised six year old that is your business. But your response is not the only acceptable one. I also likely would not have acted in a similar way to the neighbor in the OP but that does not mean she was wrong to involve the police (that was the only thing we can even somewhat accurately ascribe to her based on the mothers account).
Sorry, I see that I wasn't clear - my bad. The situation in which I would ask that question would be a young boy (or girl) in the park on a bench alone.


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Old 09-20-2014, 01:56 PM
 
Location: Central Texas
19,884 posts, read 36,393,146 times
Reputation: 21321
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri View Post
I'm glad zenapple and another posted about how an unjust investigation affected their families. Neither of these posters said that we should scrap CPS. zenapple was making a really good point that if you're going to call CPS, make sure you have a good reason because it does impact the family. The family in the OP was impacted when the children were asked questions about pornography, drugs, etc. They were impacted by seeing their mother questioned by the police and a CPS worker for a parenting decision. Her kids are no longer allowed to play outdoors. The family is planning to move to a new neighborhood because of this. It's not just a one day affair that ends when the CPS worker leaves the home. There are lasting consequences.

You said that you called CPS after seeing a child hit and jerked around by an angry caregiver in a park. I don't think many people would second guess you for that. It's very different then calling CPS for a boy playing in a park by himself. People like me are dismayed that some in our society are choosing to call the authorities for things that were once considered completely normal by all and are now still considered normal by many. CPS has it's place in our society but if you're going to make a call, make sure you have a good reason to do so. A boy playing alone in a park is not a good reason.
I was going to bold some of this for emphasis, but, really, this, all of it.

Especially the emphasis on the actual impact that call had and the attitudes of some today about what's normal.

The incident with the child being hit in the park is crystal clear. A child sitting alone on a bench gives me the (sadly too often reinforced) impression that today some people are just looking for something to be wrong so they can report it.

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Old 09-20-2014, 02:36 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,000,336 times
Reputation: 30256
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Six weeks? Where do you get that? Make things up much?
Do mature people accuse others of lying and making things up?

My post was base on the information in the OP article, which stated:

Quote:
The incident [occurred] early in August and Roy only felt it was safe to blog about the experience after she was informed last week that the case was officially closed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
According to twitter they got home from vacation on August 17th.

https://twitter.com/haikumama
You've proven the newspaper article is inaccurate. Not that I made things up.

For fun, I'm going to respond to the following lkb style:

Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
The need to constantly overdramatize the situation with made up details is ridiculous.
That is a lie. I never once overdramatized. This is where your nonsense appears. You're making this up.

The need to constantly ridicule people is laughable.


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Old 09-20-2014, 02:43 PM
 
15,745 posts, read 13,176,204 times
Reputation: 19641
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Do mature people accusing others of lying and making things up?

My post was base on the information in the OP article, which stated:




You've proven the newspaper article is inaccurate. Not that I made things up.

For fun, I'm going to respond to the following lkb style:


That is a lie. I never once overdramatized. This is where your nonsense appears. You're making this up.

The need to constantly ridicule people is laughable.


And yet, accuracy matters. If you can't be bothered to check if your statements are factual (and it took all of ten seconds to find out she got home on the 17th) than why should anyone listen to anything you say? If this were remotely a limited incident, I would let it slide but you make up stuff in every thread you post in and present yourself as an expert on everything. It isn't a mistake (which everyone makes occasionally), but rather a paradigm for you.

And for the record. If the incident happened in "early August" and her blog was Sept 9th (something you posted yourself) than it still couldn't have been six weeks. Care to do the math on that? To have been six weeks it would have had to be in July. Again, DRAMATIZATION.

This is all part and parcel of the knee jerk reaction. One side of the story presented as fact, over dramatization of those "facts", hyperbole about the family's life being "ruined", 20/20 hindsight, etc. all leading to reactionary meaningless posts.
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Old 09-20-2014, 02:56 PM
 
5,413 posts, read 4,818,147 times
Reputation: 9351
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
And yet, accuracy matters. If you can't be bothered to check if your statements are factual (and it took all of ten seconds to find out she got home on the 17th) than why should anyone listen to anything you say? If this were remotely a limited incident, I would let it slide but you make up stuff in every thread you post in and present yourself as an expert on everything. It isn't a mistake (which everyone makes occasionally), but rather a paradigm for you.

And for the record. If the incident happened in "early August" and her blog was Sept 9th (something you posted yourself) than it still couldn't have been six weeks. Care to do the math on that? To have been six weeks it would have had to be in July. Again, DRAMATIZATION.

This is all part and parcel of the knee jerk reaction. One side of the story presented as fact, over dramatization of those "facts", hyperbole about the family's life being "ruined", 20/20 hindsight, etc. all leading to reactionary meaningless posts.
6 exact weeks as in 42 days? No...but it could have easily have been six weekends or a specific day of the week....or even 40 days...and really? You are going to quibble with Hopes over two days?

Do you have any proof that anything that this woman said was inaccurate or false? You are just trying to make excuses and attack Hopes (and honestly, I don't even like her that much but I will defend her on this one) because you are just quibbling for it's own sake.

Cases like these....CPS being called for children playing outside....is wrong to happen...this sort of crap messes up peoples life and hurt everyone in the long run. How is that for overly dramatic?
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Old 09-20-2014, 03:29 PM
 
8,542 posts, read 5,264,452 times
Reputation: 9105
Whether it was six weeks of worry or three doesn't really change things. The kids saw their mother questioned by a police officer for letting them play outside. The kids saw their mother questioned by a CPS worker for letting them play outside. The kids were questioned by the CPS worker, alone and asked about things like pornography, drugs and alcohol. The kids worried about the police coming back and taking them away. The mother worried. I'm sure the father worried too. There is no doubt that this was traumatic for the family involved and that the trauma is not yet over. The kids can no longer play outside. The family is planning on moving away from this neighborhood because they can't let their kids outside due to the fear that this busybody will call CPS again. To pretend like a visit from the police and CPS is "no big deal" just shows a serious lack of empathy and/or ability to imagine what it would be like if it happened to you.

Haiku of the Day: It's all fun and games until your neighbor decides that she is the boss of the fun and games
Quote:
This whole incident has left me very angry and disillusioned. And sad. I could list statistics about how America is safer now that it's ever been. About how child injury stats can be interpolated in such a way that leaving a kid with a stranger is actually statistically safer than leaving a child with a parent or a friend of the family. I could talk about helicopter parenting and a 24-hour news cycle that is making the country paranoid and couch-bound. But what I want to talk about are children who don't feel safe outside - not because of stranger danger or threat of immediate injury, but because the police will be called if they're just playing like we played when we were young. What will the Always On Screens Generation be like when they're adults? When they weren't afforded the ability to play and explore and test limits and problem solve, when everything was sanitized and supervised, when the crimes committed against them were more likely to happen online than in the park across the street? What will this do? How will society be affected?
I feel for this family. I share some of the same concerns as this mother has expressed in her blog.
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Old 09-20-2014, 04:14 PM
 
Location: WI
2,820 posts, read 3,063,551 times
Reputation: 4815
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissTerri View Post
Whether it was six weeks of worry or three doesn't really change things. The kids saw their mother questioned by a police officer for letting them play outside. The kids saw their mother questioned by a CPS worker for letting them play outside. The kids were questioned by the CPS worker, alone and asked about things like pornography, drugs and alcohol. The kids worried about the police coming back and taking them away. The mother worried. I'm sure the father worried too. There is no doubt that this was traumatic for the family involved and that the trauma is not yet over. The kids can no longer play outside. The family is planning on moving away from this neighborhood because they can't let their kids outside due to the fear that this busybody will call CPS again. To pretend like a visit from the police and CPS is "no big deal" just shows a serious lack of empathy and/or ability to imagine what it would be like if it happened to you.

Haiku of the Day: It's all fun and games until your neighbor decides that she is the boss of the fun and games


I feel for this family. I share some of the same concerns as this mother has expressed in her blog.
This post deserves 50,000 rep points. The idea that the mom should just "get over" being investigated by CPS because after all, they didn't take her kids, is very cold. What about some empathy for this family?
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Old 09-20-2014, 04:25 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,000,336 times
Reputation: 30256
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawflower View Post
This post deserves 50,000 rep points. The idea that the mom should just "get over" being investigated by CPS because after all, they didn't take her kids, is very cold. What about some empathy for this family?
It's incomprehensible that someone believes a visit from CPS is merely an inconvenience that doesn't induce long-lasting stress and worry.
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