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Old 10-07-2009, 10:29 AM
 
10 posts, read 57,161 times
Reputation: 24

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Since nobody in person would ever admit this, I thought I would ask online anonymously.

I'm an young adult thinking about having kids one day, however the people that I talk to in person tell me how great their kids are, and that their babies are gifts. Which I completely understand becuz their babies, and I do likes my friends babies, but I'm not with them 24/7.

That said, on the other side, I know a few people who can't wait to get rid of their kids. Comments likes, I can't wait until they turn 18. So, I have to think, if you thinks kids are gifts, why do you want them to leave so soon?

That said, do you regret having kids?
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Old 10-07-2009, 10:47 AM
 
259 posts, read 705,450 times
Reputation: 162
I think kids are great, especially after they hit 7 or 8 years old. They make for great little slaves so to speak. You know things like washing dishes, taking out the trash and heck by the time their ten or 11 years old their good for mowing the lawn, pulling weeds & all sorts of good stuff. And yes, girls can mow lawns just as good as the boys can.

Keep em busy and engaged, they'll grow up to be adult sons and daughters you can be proud of.
Ignore them and you'll spend way to much time down at juvenile hall making excuses for their bad behavior.

The choice is yours.
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Old 10-07-2009, 11:10 AM
 
Location: Beautiful Upstate NY!
13,814 posts, read 28,493,779 times
Reputation: 7615
In the LV forum....ask Sierramadre44.
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Old 10-07-2009, 11:18 AM
 
3 posts, read 12,211 times
Reputation: 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanque Verde View Post
Keep em busy and engaged, they'll grow up to be adult sons and daughters you can be proud of.
Ignore them and you'll spend way to much time down at juvenile hall making excuses for their bad behavior.

The choice is yours.
A key point you made. Simple but true.

Karci186 here's my personal take based on my own experience.

WHO are you?

What kind of person are you?

Do you have a sense of direction for yourself and are YOU interested in raising healthy and happy children?

Do you see yourself as enjoying the the responsibilities and commitment of raising children into their adult years?

What IF you have a child who can't care for themselves due to some unfortunate medical or mental issues?

How would you deal with that because it happens to many people unfortunately. Would you feel like it's a burden you could carry or would you rather not deal with it.

What if your child, even after all your good intentions, takes a wrong turn, or possibly due to heredity, becomes addicted to some drug or even alcohol?

How would you and your spouse deal with an adult child who has no other option but to live with you and be supported by you for the rest of their life?

Living in a "what IF" and a "fearful" state of mind is not healthy that's for sure but just think of these questions for a moment.

I know nothing about you but I do know that within YOU you've already come to a conclusion to some degree of what's best for YOU.

Providing your a well adjusted and stable person that feeling that's inside you is probably the right one. The answer would likely not take a whole lot of soul searching unless you're very young perhaps.

If on the other hand you don't feel stable or that perhaps you have some unresolved issues that you should deal with than let that be your guiding light.

One thing I do know regardless of all the self help books, self help gurus on tv and what not is...

Your gut instinct is nearly always right.

Again...this is assuming a person is of sound mind, mentally stable, and does not have any serious personality disorders.

Wishing you much health, happiness and success!
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Old 10-07-2009, 11:22 AM
 
10,494 posts, read 27,238,533 times
Reputation: 6717
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanque Verde View Post
I think kids are great, especially after they hit 7 or 8 years old. They make for great little slaves so to speak. You know things like washing dishes, taking out the trash and heck by the time their ten or 11 years old their good for mowing the lawn, pulling weeds & all sorts of good stuff. And yes, girls can mow lawns just as good as the boys can.

Keep em busy and engaged, they'll grow up to be adult sons and daughters you can be proud of.
Ignore them and you'll spend way to much time down at juvenile hall making excuses for their bad behavior.

The choice is yours.
OMG, I am happy you were not my parent.
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Old 10-07-2009, 11:31 AM
 
1,770 posts, read 2,897,057 times
Reputation: 1174
I've debated about kids. I am actually too much of a selfish person for kids.
Like, I work way too hard for my money and I'm perfectly content spending it on just us. The idea of sacrificing things for myself to make their lives easier, sadly, doesn't appeal to me at all.

I think people in my situation are the ones who DO have kids and regret it. I know I would end up regretting it
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Old 10-07-2009, 12:12 PM
 
259 posts, read 705,450 times
Reputation: 162
Quote:
Originally Posted by las vegas drunk View Post
OMG, I am happy you were not my parent.

Heh..heh..
More than anything else we never let our kids forget who the boss was. We were always their parents, never their friends. Even now in their late 20's and early 30's we keep it that way, although not quite so much now.
The payoff , they can make their own way through life without the need of my help or the help of taxpayers.
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Old 10-07-2009, 12:23 PM
 
10,494 posts, read 27,238,533 times
Reputation: 6717
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanque Verde View Post
Heh..heh..
More than anything else we never let our kids forget who the boss was. We were always their parents, never their friends. Even now in their late 20's and early 30's we keep it that way, although not quite so much now.
The payoff , they can make their own way through life without the need of my help or the help of taxpayers.
It was quite different in my household. My mother was always my best friend. When my father died in 1999, my mom and I really bonded. We would actually go out to the nightclubs all the time and party. People actually thought she was my girlfriend LOL. She always said I was the daughter she never had. Sadly, she has passed away now too, and I am truly all alone.
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Old 10-07-2009, 12:25 PM
 
815 posts, read 2,052,093 times
Reputation: 540
do you regret having kids?

Only if they regret having parents.
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Old 10-07-2009, 01:01 PM
 
259 posts, read 705,450 times
Reputation: 162
Quote:
Originally Posted by las vegas drunk View Post
It was quite different in my household. My mother was always my best friend. When my father died in 1999, my mom and I really bonded. We would actually go out to the nightclubs all the time and party. People actually thought she was my girlfriend LOL. She always said I was the daughter she never had. Sadly, she has passed away now too, and I am truly all alone.
if you think happy thoughts remembering days gone by when you were a kid growing up than your parents did a good job.

I have a daughter raising up four kids and she's doing everything she can to be their friend. The down side, she's already having some trouble keeping em in line. The upside, Daddy is an architect so money is never an issue, she can bribe them into doing whatever it is she wants them to do. We'll see how it turns out.
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