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Old 10-05-2014, 02:52 AM
Location: Purgatory
6,317 posts, read 4,439,198 times
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No one has mentioned what works best in motivating anyone- bribery! (ie "positive reinforcement. ") Find out what he LOVES and give him more when a goal is met.

A lot of research about this online. Works particularly well for "special needs" children too.

Search: behavior modification program, treatment, ABA, token systems
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Old 10-05-2014, 03:05 AM
Location: The Netherlands
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The best thing is a therapy. As I feel.
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Old 10-05-2014, 07:32 AM
15,744 posts, read 13,171,628 times
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Originally Posted by veuvegirl View Post
I have just let him fail for a few weeks. Honestly I am nervous to go longer, but maybe I should! He is in therapy for anxiety, thanks for the feedback.
The reason you fear him failing classes is that you are worried for college and beyond but it is far more important that he learns the lessons about failing NOW before the consequences are worse than repeating a grade or summer school. What you are doing now ensures he will not succeed in college.

The reality is it is impossible to externally motivate another person to achieve something so intenal as learning. So let him fail, even for a year. Summer school can be a huge wake up call, so can seeing his peers move up a grade. But don't let it define him either. Many, many kids have had a bad beginning to high school and turn out find.

It is likely that like most teens he doesn't biologicsll have the ability to abstract reason yet and thus cannot make the connection between having long term goals and working towards them. So it may improve on its own around 15 or 16. Just make sure you don't foster bad habits until then.
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