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Old 10-01-2014, 05:36 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
Reputation: 30256

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Skatergirl View Post
Sheesh, Some mean spirited jabs....why so dam judgemental?? Fwiw, both boys have special needs...so both struggle make friends. And we don't live near each other. I really regret posting.
Not living near each other doesn't require the parents to instigate and arrange get-togethers. By 13, children do that on their own and then ask their parents for rides. Since they are special needs and the boy does come to visit when you initiate contact and make arrangements, I wouldn't say a word. It would be different if the boy wasn't coming to your house at all. Then you'd know you were being shunned. Since he is coming to your house and she is simply not having your son at her house, I'd let it go. She could be going through a very stressful time in her life. Maybe she helped her son send your son emails but she's too busy to be that involved with her son right now. Since she's introverted, the last thing she needs is you asking about it.
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Old 10-01-2014, 07:31 AM
gg
 
Location: Pittsburgh
16,933 posts, read 17,180,377 times
Reputation: 10786
Let all that go. It is pretty common at 13 for boys to switch friends around. My only advice is to try to keep your kid busy with sports or something. Kids need to be involved in something.
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Old 10-01-2014, 07:38 AM
 
Location: Dallas TX
14,294 posts, read 20,544,645 times
Reputation: 20159
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skatergirl View Post
Sheesh, Some mean spirited jabs....why so dam judgemental?? Fwiw, both boys have special needs...so both struggle make friends. And we don't live near each other. I really regret posting.
Try not to take it too personally. People can get a bit nasty on message boards, and honestly this time around most people were just offering an opinion. There were definitely a couple of mean spirited posts, just ignore them.

Even with the boys having special needs, it sounds as if they have grown apart. My son and his friend were this way, both had a hard time making friends. Then suddenly the other friend just stopped calling, my son moved on. It is probably harder on you then it is on your son.
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Old 10-01-2014, 07:55 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,960 posts, read 98,795,031 times
Reputation: 31371
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeurich View Post
What is WWYD?
Well 13 year old can manage the problems on their own.
And you watch a 13 year old all day?
Here in EU after 12 there is no day cares for them either. Most of the kids that age stay home alone till parents get home.
Better let it go. If she is interested keep in touch she will other wise leave it.
1. The OP is talking about some time in the past.

2. The kids both have special needs.
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Old 10-01-2014, 08:14 AM
 
Location: FLG/PHX/MKE
7,289 posts, read 12,868,909 times
Reputation: 11529
[quote=Skatergirl;36698302 Im wondering what could have happened and not sure how to proceed. I think mom may not be upfront with me if i ask and i risk having her feel uncomfortable(she is a bit introverted) and then having her wanting to avoid me totally for fear of more uncomfortable conversation.
[/QUOTE]

The presumption that she will be uncomfortable because you think she's introverted is incorrect. It could simply be that she doesn't like you, or doesn't want to spend time gossiping because she has better things to do, but doesn't want to be impolite by shutting off the conversation. Maybe she is interfering with the boys' relationship because she doesn't like your son. There are many possibilities.
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Old 10-01-2014, 08:29 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
Reputation: 30256
Quote:
Originally Posted by 43north87west View Post
The presumption that she will be uncomfortable because you think she's introverted is incorrect.
Even though the OP is using the word introvert, she's describing an avoidant personality. As a result, the OP is wise to not confront her because she'll withdraw further.
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Old 10-01-2014, 08:41 AM
 
Location: MMU->ABE->ATL->ASH
9,002 posts, read 16,123,201 times
Reputation: 9676
HE.. Her Son.. HE..... HIM Boy Male ....

...

Several posters have changed her SON from a HE to a SHE......

Last edited by flyonpa; 10-01-2014 at 09:53 AM..
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Old 10-01-2014, 10:09 AM
 
Location: Dallas TX
14,294 posts, read 20,544,645 times
Reputation: 20159
Quote:
Originally Posted by flyonpa View Post
HE.. Her Son.. HE..... HIM Boy Male ....

...

Several posters have changed her SON from a HE to a SHE......
I think you are confusing there are two people in the OP's post. There is the mother of the son who is introverted (she) and the son (HE).
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Old 10-01-2014, 10:27 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
5,337 posts, read 3,952,995 times
Reputation: 4172
I am with most posters who say, let the boy figure it out on his own. I might ask him what was up if anything and then let it go. Most of the friends your kids will have at 13 are from school and as they grow and change classes, so will their friends.
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Old 10-01-2014, 10:28 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,960 posts, read 98,795,031 times
Reputation: 31371
The friend's mother also works; perhaps she simply doesn't have a lot of extra time to hang out, and she doesn't know how to tell the OP that. Lots of people do that. Then you run into them somewhere and they say, "I've just been so busy", which is standard-speak for "I don't want to get together". Sometimes it's even true!
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