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Wow Ethan - I can't imagine... well, actually, I can.
When my son got bigger than me, he did try to intimidate me physically. I ordered him outside to talk, sat down, texted his dad to come home IMMEDIATELY, started recording and talking to him. He was not aware of the recording. My sitting down deflated his physical threats and I tried not to let him see that I was scared (he was 6' 200lbs at the time, 14). His father arrived home within a half hour, at which point he denied everything.
His dad then got into HIS face, told him that if he EVER did something to try to physically intimidate HIS WIFE again, we would involve outside help, ie - the police. We all then sat down and had a discussion about domestic violence, the threat to HIS future and the choices he was making... we let him know that if he forced me into a situation where I had to call the police, the matter would be out of our hands - and no amount of crying, "I didn't mean it" would help him.
It is/was hormones. We discussed coping techniques - and that his size and/or age didn't mean he was in charge. Even when/if I'm 90 and he's 60, I will still tell him what to do and expect him to comply. It's about respect.
Now he's almost 16 and even bigger. He "stepped up" to his dad one other time - about 30 days after that incident, and IMMEDIATELY backed down and regretted it.
I'm sure it's different when it's a man/daughter issue, but at the base, this is the same thing - hormones and teenagers, testing their limits. I hope things continue to improve for you Ethan!
Glad this is getting better for you. Will say that parenting is mostly mental as far as the situation you describe, you are the parent at all times even if the child is stronger. Perhaps therapy is helping with all the dynamics.
So glad you are working it.
All this to say that being a parent is a hard thing and it takes mental toughness more than physical. Good luck and if you haven't checked with the doctor you might have some hormonal checks done. It sounds suspicious.
I couldn't imagine swelling up at my parents, let alone my father & I was into lifting because of wrestling & weightlifting in HS. I had too much respect for my parents based on my old-school upbringing; that, and my dad was a big man at 6'4 & 300 lbs (could lift 2-3 times his weight in his prime), so how would that have went for me if I tried that? If she's into lifting then it's not unusual to put on solid mass if she's lifting consistently.
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