How can Dads be stay at home Dads?! I couldn't! (child care, ideas)
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How does a father manage to be a stay at home Dad?! This seems both hilarious and impossible for me if I had to do it. I work full time, so times more than 40 hours a week. My wife is a stay at home Mother for 2 young children (boy is 1 and 1/2 years old and girl is almost 4 years old). She is a very good mother. I can't seem to stay more than 1/2 a day with my young kids before I need a break or rest! I even had to call the babysitter one day to give me a break so I could go out for an hour or so when my wife was out. My wife has done everything like feeding, dressing, changing the diapers, and bathing our children since they were born. I have changed diapers and fed my children at times, when my wife could not. So, I love my children very much, and I love to play and wrestle with them, but I can't imagine being a stay at home father, and I would never, ever want to , So how is it and why are some men are stay at home fathers?
Last edited by Serenity2019; 06-26-2015 at 07:18 AM..
Because different people have different tolerances? I mean, some men wash out port-a-potties all day, and I presume you wouldn't like that either. A few of them might prefer to stay home with just a few dirty diapers instead.
You know, your wife probably doesn't think it's any more fun than you do, but she doesn't foist her responsibilities on someone else.
I think it's funny when men think it's fun for women to do all the menial chores of child care for very young children. It's really boring and time consuming.
So your question is really...how does any adult put up with their kids? Answer: By sucking it up bc you brought them into the world and it is your job to raise them.
Everybody has different strengths and weaknesses and families arrange things as works for them. In many families the father has more fexibility with his work or the wife has the more highpowered and stressful job.
But even if not, most fathers help raise their children much more than you, even if not a SAHD. How does your wife feel about you doing absolutely nothing and not even being able to care them for your kids for couple of hours?
Everybody has different strengths and weaknesses and families arrange things as works for them. In many families the father has more fexibility with his work or the wife has the more highpowered and stressful job.
But even if not, most fathers help raise their children much more than you, even if not a SAHD. How does your wife feel about you doing absolutely nothing and not even being able to care them for your kids for couple of hours?
You are pretty hard on me! I do support the whole family financially and protect them and take my children to church.
Some couples do what they have to to make the family work. I've known a couple of SAHD's. Both stayed home because of the wife's career.
One dad I know said he quit working when his wife was transferred to another country. They have more than enough money to live on and they may get transferred out of county again. It doesn't make sense for him to keep getting jobs he'll have to quit.
The other dad also needed to follow his wife's career. He stayed home, but worked on business ideas, improving skills, and making a name for himself. Last I heard, he was quite successful.
I'm a SAHM who has also moved several times because of my husband's career. It doesn't make sense for me to work. I wouldn't even be able to pull off a full work week in the hours that I have available once the kids are out of the house and off to school. I did work when they were little. I certainly don't miss trying to cram all of the shopping and everything into weekends and a couple of hours after work.
Not sure of what is happening between you and your wife, but sounds like you need to help her more.
I wish I could do it, but I am the primary breadwinner, with a much larger salary potential than my wife, given our different careers. If she would make more money than I could, I would have her go work while I stay at home with the two little guys. I would love it. Also, I am very hands-on with caretaking, anyway, so it wouldn't be a big difference for me.
Am I the only one wondering what the OP is "protecting" his family from that requires so much time and effort that he can only change diapers or feed his children if his wife is unable to do so? Guessing his job (the paying one) isn't taking up his time 24/7 and how much time does taking them to church take? Especially if they are still in diapers - most churches have nurseries for very young children. The balance of his time and energy is "protection"? From what exactly?
I've been a Stay At Home Dad for 5 years. My youngest of three girls (5, 7 and almost 10) starts Kinder in a couple months. It hasn't been all laughs and giggles, but I'm glad for the choices we've made with our family. My wife is an RN, and we live modestly, but we do it. It's been and continues to be a lesson in patience and understanding, but that's just parenting in general, if the parents are aware and willing. I would rather put my time and effort in to my own family than work at a job I don't like, or doesn't have a benefit on a larger human scale. My previous jobs have been in EMS and animal healthcare, so I did enjoy those and their purpose- but to hang with my kids all the time? - no brainer! Everyone is different though, some people don't relate to kids well, or have the patience or interest for a deep or extensive relationship with them. Kids need positivity and nurturing, whether they get it from parents or grandparents or sitters or educators. Some parents have a more rewarding relationship in smaller doses I guess. Parenting is not easy no matter how you look at it, but being present, patient and in less of a rush go a long way...
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