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Technically, you are supposed to use the money for something related to the welfare of the children. You could argue that you are doing this by giving the money back. Nobody is going to check anyway and you don't have to account for how you are using this.
A little off topic, but how come we have rights for women in this aspect, but men are thrown under the bus? As one woman has posted, she could have screwed him over if she wanted. These men that are screwed turn to drugs and suicide. I hopersonally everyone can agree that alimony and child support needs to be treated fairly case by case.
Most international and national child support regulations recognize that every parent has an obligation to support his or her child. Under this obligation, both parents are expected to share the responsibility for their children's expenses.
It kind of goes against the principle that both parents are equally obligated to support their child (children).
If you give the support money back to him, and he accepts it, well... that could get complicated for him later on. What if you decided later, to go to court to cut him out of their lives? You could argue that he was weaselling out of his support payments, and wasn't contributing equally to their upkeep, etc.. It really wouldn't be advisable for him to agree to taking back the money from you.
Technically, you are supposed to use the money for something related to the welfare of the children. You could argue that you are doing this by giving the money back. Nobody is going to check anyway and you don't have to account for how you are using this.
She has to pay taxes on the support that she's receiving, though, whether or not she gives the money back to him... is that not how it works in the U.S.?
She has to pay taxes on the support that she's receiving, though, whether or not she gives the money back to him... is that not how it works in the U.S.?
No. Child support income is exempt from taxation (but the party that pays had that income taxed)
This is one of the ways that the truth is often obfuscated in family court. The effective income of the party receiving child support is MUCH higher than it apprears, yet the effective income of the payer is MUCH lower.
Often this translates into the cp living a life of luxury and the ncp living a life of poverty.
In my case my ex lives in a million dollar home, doesn't work, goes on several vacations every year to posh resorts, and goes out to eat at nice restaurants several times a week....all while I'm living in poverty with
expenses that far exceed income.
The worst part is that she never should have been given custody in the first place- but I guess that's another story for another thread.
This is one of the ways that the truth is often obfuscated in family court. The effective income of the party receiving child support is MUCH higher than it apprears, yet the effective income of the payer is MUCH lower.
Good point here.
When someone is ordered to pay $800/month in CS. The amount the payor pays is higher due to taxes. That $800 is closer to $1200 with you factor in the taxes paid on that income.
Anyway, to respond to the OP. basically the easiest wasy to do this and play right by the legal system is to keep having the ex pay CS through the court system. This keeps him up to date in the system and he won't incur the penalties usually imposed on people who don't pay. The court just cares that CS is paid.
After that, if you want to give him the money back, go right ahead. If you pay him a check you may be bound by gift tax laws. If you give him cash, well then it will never be traceable down the road if you end up in court.
Honestly, family court is really if you can't work things out between yourselves. Sounds like the Op and her ex have a good relationship. I do know of one couple that asked for, mutually, a ZERO child support award and just work things out between themselves. It does happen.
Only think I can think of as to why a court prefers some type of award is because the state does get matching dollars from the fed on CS awards. (conspiracy theory warning) If they issue a $0 award, that's less money for the state vs the $200-300K or so the state would get by ordering the dad to play CS.
She has to pay taxes on the support that she's receiving, though, whether or not she gives the money back to him... is that not how it works in the U.S.?
I'm pretty sure child support isn't taxable income. Oops, nevermind. Just saw the above post.
Interesting. I never thought about the effective income part.
Child support is not YOUR money OP. It is the child's. If you do not need the money to support the child, it should be going into a bank account somewhere for the child's future use like for college.
If you feel that the child support is too large a burden on your ex, than go to court and ask them to change it legally. Just giving it back is probably illegal (if it is court ordered/garnished) and you are sending an odd message to your child.
Thanks everyone, I actually did try to plead the case to the judge that if he pays CS he will have very little left over to do anything with the kids but the judge didn't care. Amazing how easy it could have been for me to really screw him over if I wanted, alimony was even offered but was able to decline that. Isn't this system supposed to be fair? It's not even that me making more money is new, ever since we got married I always made a lot more.
Screw him over? You obviously are not seeing the clear picture. Child support is to take care of the children. What if you lost your job? Had an accident, etc.?
Right now you have a better job than your ex but that could change in an instant. The important thing is that your children have a roof over their heads, clothes to wear and food to eat. Unfortunately, the courts have been forced to mandate child support since many people don't look out for the best interests of their children.
Stick that money in the kids' college funds NOW and enjoy the savings later.
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