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Old 07-23-2015, 07:17 PM
 
1,030 posts, read 1,417,738 times
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To the mother, yes, to the courts, no.

Mom abused daughter, 14, by allowing her to shower with her dad, court rules | PennLive.com

Quote:
The mother believed the showers her 14-year-old daughter was taking with her father were "innocent" and that the dad "would not do anything inappropriate," according to court documents in the New Jersey child welfare case.


Even the daughter told investigators that her father never abused her and that he "just soaped up and talked about the day," turning away when he washed himself, according to a report by our sister website, NJ.com. But a doctor who performed a sexual abuse evaluation on the girl recommended she seek counseling because she was "desensitized to the need to respect her bodily privacy."


As a result, the mother is guilty of child abuse and neglect, a New Jersey appellate court has ruled. The mother, identified in court papers as "Maureen R." lost her appeal of a Family Court's finding that she had abused and neglected her 14-year-old daughter by allowing the girl's father to shower with her, NJ.com reported.


The mother had appealed the original decision, saying that there was insufficient proof of harm or proof of her daughter being in "imminent danger." But the appellate court disagreed, finding that "a reasonable parent would perceive the risks inherent in the behavior here," NJ.com reported.
More at link. Personally I am unsure what to think. On one hand it seems absolutely crazy a 14 year old girl would want to shower with her father but if she and the mother are okay with it, well...I think at the least it was crazy for the courts to get involved and the mother arrested.
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Old 07-23-2015, 07:34 PM
 
14,381 posts, read 16,513,497 times
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Well, when you bring in the context that the father raped his niece, I understand why the court ruled the way it did. This was clearly not just innocent showering, even if he never laid a hand on his daughter. He was likely grooming her.

Now, if the niece had never accused him, I'd still be freaked out. I used to shower with my father when I was very small - nothing odd about that. We were very casual about nudity around the house when I was a child, but as I grew older and was developing, my parents respected my boundaries and followed my lead. As I became uncomfortable with being naked around my dad with the onset of puberty, he respected that and took care to guard his own privacy in return.

This child didn't seem to develop a normal sense of boundaries from my perspective, and it looks like the doctor who did the evaluation found the same thing. Did she even know she had the right to request privacy? I suspect also that there is plenty of additional information that we don't have that led the courts to this finding.
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Old 07-23-2015, 07:55 PM
 
4,787 posts, read 10,759,395 times
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Why is this even a question? The father has been found guilty of sexually abusing a 15 year old niece over a period of time. What kind of mother stays with this kind of man and then also lets him shower with her 14 year old daughter ? I'm glad the court had more sense than the mom.
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Old 07-23-2015, 07:57 PM
 
8,929 posts, read 4,763,731 times
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Not only is this sick but what kind of drugs are these parents on...?
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Old 07-23-2015, 08:13 PM
 
13,875 posts, read 23,705,349 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PeaceAndLove42 View Post
To the mother, yes, to the courts, no.

Mom abused daughter, 14, by allowing her to shower with her dad, court rules | PennLive.com

More at link. Personally I am unsure what to think. On one hand it seems absolutely crazy a 14 year old girl would want to shower with her father but if she and the mother are okay with it, well...I think at the least it was crazy for the courts to get involved and the mother arrested.
The courts got involved because the parents are idiots, and at least one of them was involved in sexual abuse.
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Old 07-23-2015, 09:46 PM
 
3,352 posts, read 2,589,580 times
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No is not okay in anyway.
I would beat the living tart of him.
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Old 07-23-2015, 09:51 PM
 
32,524 posts, read 34,283,396 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PeaceAndLove42 View Post
On one hand it seems absolutely crazy a 14 year old girl would want to shower with her father but if she and the mother are okay with it, well...I think at the least it was crazy for the courts to get involved and the mother arrested.
She was being groomed for sexual abuse.

The court protected her from a sexual predator and a mother who is, to say the least, a miserable failure as a parent. She stayed with a man who sexually abused a girl. Disgusting.
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Old 07-24-2015, 12:49 AM
 
989 posts, read 882,688 times
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No, it's not okay for a father to shower with his teen daughter. How is that even a question? I don't think it was "crazy" for the courts to get involved, either. They're doing what they're supposed to do - protecting children when their parents do not. Dad was wrong to do it, Mom was wrong to allow it.
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Old 07-24-2015, 01:01 AM
 
Location: Warren, OH
2,747 posts, read 3,835,589 times
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Never.
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Old 07-24-2015, 01:14 AM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,977 posts, read 13,561,116 times
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Your thread title is misleading and should read Is it okay for a sexual predator to shower with his 14 year-old daughter?
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