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My ex let her have one of those 8oz. Margaritas in a can... I let her know that she made a mistake that the can she meant to grab should read Sprite and proceeded to reach over and grab the can. ... What would you do?
Meh.
I think you should teach your daughter about sensible drinking.
I live outside of the US and I practically raised my boy in the pubs. He's always had a small drink along with me, and I've always let him try my ale or whatever I was drinking.
Not saying that all kids will react the same, but, my kid is a model of self discipline, including wrt to booze.
I think that forbidding booze simply because "its the law" is inviting trouble. And I am one who respects the rule of law. But, the rule of nature is difficult to refuse.
Which is all the more reason to teach your children how to drink responsibly before they go off to college and by having fits and making alcohol such an issue, they are almost guaranteed to go off and binge drink in college when you are not around to throw a fit.
Mom's side of the family is Italian, so we kids were given wine at celebrations once we were able to sit at the dinner table. My one cousin and I ended up straight laced/square (whatever) and my other cousin and my brother ended up alcoholics/drug addicts. Lesson learned: Alcohol or any other mood enhancer/suppressor is like Russian roulette - you will either end up just fine or dead, but you are taking a chance.
I also feel that any 17 yr old daughter knows their parents well enough to know how they will react to a situation and how they interact with each other. My guess would be that your daughter knew better that to just get the OK from her mom without cluing her law enforcement dad in on the situation.
Which is all the more reason to teach your children how to drink responsibly before they go off to college and by having fits and making alcohol such an issue, they are almost guaranteed to go off and binge drink in college when you are not around to throw a fit.
Yep. I grew up outside the U.S. but went to college in the states. At home I'd been drinking socially for years at the pub with my parents as well as with friends. Our graduation formal (like a prom) had an open bar.
When I started college I couldn't believe these irresponsible "children" who thought it was cool to drink until they couldn't stand or to vomit they were so drunk. First time away from mommy and daddy I guess.
Mom's side of the family is Italian, so we kids were given wine at celebrations once we were able to sit at the dinner table. My one cousin and I ended up straight laced/square (whatever) and my other cousin and my brother ended up alcoholics/drug addicts. Lesson learned: Alcohol or any other mood enhancer/suppressor is like Russian roulette - you will either end up just fine or dead, but you are taking a chance.
I also feel that any 17 yr old daughter knows their parents well enough to know how they will react to a situation and how they interact with each other. My guess would be that your daughter knew better that to just get the OK from her mom without cluing her law enforcement dad in on the situation.
You hit the nail on the head right there. I have no problem letting her have a drink AT HOME. Teaching her responsible drinking should be done at home. My daughter knows which of her 2 parents is likely to say no (and give real legitimate reasons for doing so, not just saying because I said so), and which parent is more likely to say yes just because she is a good kid. I'm not afraid of saying no to my child. My ex differs and that should be ok as long as the topic was discussed between us first. Unfortunately in the months leading up to and since we divorced things I thought were no brainers (I.E. boyfriends visiting late on a school night, sneaking out the house to talk to the boyfriend at 2 a.m., attending house parties where no adult will be present) are now allowed. I have learned to take a breath and let it all go because I don't live in the house anymore, and when (If ever asked) I try to offer a different option everyone can live with. This is how I have learned to survive these remaining teenage years without blowing a gasket. I do get along a lot better with my ex as a result, and any anger or frustration I may feel is discussed with my therapist, or taken out in the form of exercise, or practice at the firing range.
You let your 14 year old drink, are in law enforcement, and thought it would be wise to admit this to a group of strangers?
You really should read the original post COMPLETELY before commenting. Thank you for your opinion anyway.
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