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Take him out of the private school. No need to waste your money while he flunks out. He can do that for free in public school. While there, maybe he will be bullied and have some sense knocked into him.
Bluntly worded, but not a bad idea at all. OP says her kid values going to the private school. It's possible that the genuine threat of being thrown into a "gen pop" public school would scare some responsibility into him.
But my take on it, if our child did not like doing his homework, at that age, everything gets cut off, until it is done. Be firm, no room for softies and letting things go. Agree to a home work time, stick to it, homework is very important for grades and responsibilities. Slackers are born from not doing their homework.
How are his test scores? Doing the home work, leads to higher test scores , and higher overall grade. Homework is the KEY to getting high grades!
We did the notes with the teacher in years past but this year they want the kids to be fully responsible for keeping track, doing, and turning in their own homework. That's why this is the worst year so far regarding this issue. I will try and mention it at out conference but so far they don't seem like that's an option.
They do send home a homework is not an option sheet when its late, and we have to sign it and if he doesn't turn said homework in the next day, he then stays an hour after school. But this hasn't deterred the behavior either.
And we have spoken to him about doing 6th grade again and he states he doesn't want that to happen. He loves the school and his friends but what he tells us is he hates homework. We have the whole homework isn't optional talk and then he does the same things.
I feel you, I really do. Been there with my daughter so I totally understand the frustration. My daughter is ADHD as well and we noticed how grades were starting to slip (not failing but not up to potential either) and the same excuses with homework. We had her Rx increased to the next dosage because by the time she got home from school, meds were wearing off. Have you spoken to his doctor about school? Also, most private schools are not so quick or willing to provide services (504 Accomodation Plan).
I am so frustrated with my 12 year old son, it's ridiculous. He won't do all his homework, lies about having it done, or sometimes doesn't even bring it home to do it. He goes to a catholic school and is happy there. He also has ADHD, but homework is supposed to be done right after school so his medicine hasn't worn off. We check what he does show us but anything left at school or writing assignments we never know about until the teacher states that they were never done. And then he tries the I turned it, I lost it, I don't know what happened. We have a homework folder that goes to and from school. We have taken away all privileges, no anything-video games, Ipad, computer, tv, reading at night past bedtime, etc.
He's in the 6th grade and at this point they are expected to write down homework in their assignment binder and to turn it in on the expected date; some are next day assignments and he usually has 1-2 things due the next week. The teacher doesn't check their assignment books anymore and I understand why. He understands the work that needs done, hes a pretty smart kid, and if not we will help him and explain what we can. Also, this isn't new, its been going on but in past years the younger they were the more lenient the teachers were with this. Now that its on him, his grades are suffering. He gets great grades on schoolwork but with all the missing homework, his grades are slipping to low C's, and D's.
Any ideas on what we can do to help him? Anything we can suggest to his teacher at conferences? We've tried pause breaks, snacks, giving him things back little by little, doing fun things when he does good but as soon as that happens he slides back the other way, rewards for good report cards. It's not a long term fix.
This article may be copied and distributed without permission if the
source is given as follows:
Excerpted from The Homework Plan: A Parent's Guide to Helping Kids
Excel by Linda Sonna, Ph.D.
Don't assume students will choose to study if given an option.
DO provide the structure students need by holding a study hall at home each school night.
Don't banish kids to their bedrooms where they are free to romp and roam, piddle and play.
DO have them study at a central location where you can monitor, such as the kitchen table.
Don't expect kids to study unsupervised.
DO join them at the table to read, pay bills, do a craft project, paint your fingernails, or pursue another quiet activity whenever possible.
Don't allow kids to study with the TV or stereo on.
DO set a timer & have the whole family observe quiet time during the study hall--provide puzzles and crayons for toddlers and ask them to whisper; put infants in a nearby playpen filled with toys.
Don't play "homework detective" to learn what has been assigned and when everything is due.
DO hold a study hall at home each day for the same length of time WHETHER OR NOT students have assignments, materials, or appear to be working.
Don't bribe or punish to get kids to bring home books and do assignments.
DO let boredom serve as a motivator by continuing to hold a study hall each night.
Don't scold kids who talk, sleep, or doodle.
DO time interruptions (both "good" and "bad," no matter who was "at fault") and extend the study hall to compensate students for lost time (add the time missed plus two minutes per interruption). Make sure
students get their full time to study, no matter what!
Don't teach, tutor, or assume responsibility for homework.
DO play educational games and provide FUN ways to learn.
Don't complain about students' poor ability to organize, concentrate, manage responsibility, plan ahead, etc.
DO learn how to teach these crucial skills yourself.
Don't give up before YOU'VE done YOUR homework!
DO remember that for every homework problem, there really is a solution!
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