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I do find it a bit odd that so many are saying as long as she's not doing drugs it's okay to spend so much time doing something that sounds pretty frivolous. - she's just being a typical teenaged girl, right? Just a thought that GIRLS are often given passes for being obsessed with makeup and clothes when they'd be better encouraged to get a part time job or charity work, tutoring, whatever. I mean, we can kind of pretend that she's getting ready to major in film or marketing or some such, but again, that's letting girls off the hook to do something real.
Well boys are given passes to be obsessed with girls and sports as a teen. What is the difference? Teens are usually shallow. I wasn't, for the most part. I started several social action groups. Worked hard. Etc. But I also was secretly obsessed with my apperance and what people thought of me. But that part of me was squashed by my hippy parents. Maybe if I got to explore it a little I would have a little bit of self esteem about my appearance and not wear yoga pants daily.
Parenting teens is so hard. Make it easier on yourself.
I was a tough one for my parents. My sister was less of a headache.
My 17-year old will be gone to college in 9 months, and I don't like it because she has gotten easier to deal with the older she got. She was harder in elementary/middle school than high school. She listened better as she got older. Went for a walk a couple days ago in the park, and I had to keep pushing her away, because she keeps grabbing me while walking -- hands, arms -- I find it annoying. She was cuddly since she was a little girl. Even now, at 5'8, 130 lbs she is the same.
My wife trusts my 17-year old more than me to babysit the 9-year old.
If she raises her voice she will be read the riot act. Still. She even straightens out the 9-year old when she tries to have the last word with me.
This kid is no dummy or pushover. She has been riding the subway alone since 12 in NYC, and has worked the last three summers unpaid internships in Hospitals. One summer she worked for 8 weeks at the Pediatric Emergency Room. I can't even stand to listen her stories without getting sick.
The 9-year old? That's a different story. She thinks she runs the town.
It teaches them a LOT of things they won't learn sitting in front of a computer.
That may have worked 20 years ago, but now her chances of learning a truly valuable skill that can translate to a high dollar career is right in front of the computer. Having 10,000 followers is easily monetized and if she is good, could quickly start making more money than mom and dad. If she enjoys it and is good, let her follow her passion.
Raising teens is soooo hard!! My daughter is 15 and overall is a "good kid". She gets good grades, no drinking, drugs etc.. I have always tried to instill good values in her. As a Christian, I believe in the importance of humility, compassion, respect and gratitude. Up till age 13, she was a doll. Then she starting becoming addicted to youtube and would watch teen "beauty gurus" for hours a day and became really obsessed with them. Not sure how many of you can relate to how crazy it is that young kids can start youtube channels and quickly become famous. I had no idea. At 13 she asked if she could start her own channel and make beauty videos. I said no for a long time but then let her do one.. BIG MISTAKE!! The early videos in my opinion were very silly and immature. But she very quickly started getting tons of subscribers and fans and people encouraging her to make more videos. I was against it and I told her to limit her videos to simple make up and arts and craft ideas. Fast forward till now! She is 15 and has 10,000 subscribers and has turned into a total narcissist! She's very fake on her videos and tries to act so cool and say all the right trendy things. I don't even recognize her anymore. She's made friends with several other youtube beauty gurus who are also very self centered. My daughter has become shallow and fake. I do watch her videos before she uploads and some are ok but others are downright embarrassing. When I tell her that this is not who you are and you are not representing yourself in a genuine way, she goes NUTS!!! She says I'm not proud of her and everyone of her fans adore her and say she is their idol. Well that's a problem to me. She is so addicted to the fame and has an unhealthy need to be adored to the point that she is a different person on her videos. When I try to talk to her , we end up fighting. She says that she is being real in her videos and I just don't want her to be happy. She says her friends mothers all support and are proud of their daughters channels. I've considered just pulling the plug on the account but I'm afraid she will do something to rebel even more. She flips when I tell her that this youtube is changing her. Her love for her channel has far replaced her love for God and family. In fact she almost never mentions her faith. I don't mind if she makes videos about cooking or crafting but really they are mostly about her outfits and her lifestyle. She has become so hard to live with. I cry all the time and I am depressed. I miss that sweet little Angel girl she was when she was younger. I miss buying her dolls and taking her to the park. It was so simple then. My husband and I are at a loss. We can't talk to her without a fight. I just wonder if any of you have teens and understand this youtube insanity. I'm sorry for this being long! I'd love any advice. Thanks!
If she keeps watching "Rice Bunny" and other fashion sites on U-Tube then she'll get business ideas, and starting making millions AND THEN where will you be?
That may have worked 20 years ago, but now her chances of learning a truly valuable skill that can translate to a high dollar career is right in front of the computer.
Not if that's ALL she does. I didn't say she SHOULDN'T "sit in front of a computer." I only said that working a part-time job offline would teach her "a lot of things" she won't learn online.
Don't worry: the internet isn't going anywhere. But it is not the be-all, end-all for everyone.
Perhaps the daughter should post how she is trying to run a business but her "christian' mom is "throwing shade" on her.
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