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Old 12-19-2015, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Dallas TX
14,294 posts, read 20,539,012 times
Reputation: 20153

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Time to dump your boyfriend and his son. Get some respect for yourself. Try to read what you wrote objectively. Get yourself out of this situation. The son is not the only mooch in this story.
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Old 12-19-2015, 09:57 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma USA
1,196 posts, read 782,026 times
Reputation: 4387
Quote:
Originally Posted by Petitegal74 View Post
Yes his dad paid for the van but put it in my name cause I can pay cheaper car insurance with a good driving record. Yes his dad did step in and told his son that my name was on the van title. He told him to return it. He had to tell him for about a month. His son still didn't listen. We didn't know where he had the van at. I found out that he got his job transfer in the same town where we live. I step in and send him a text telling him that I will bring the police to his job to get the van. He got mad and return the van. The van was in my driveway until it got transferred to his name. It took about another month to get it transferred. I was smart to take the plate off cause I knew that he wouldn't able to drive it. I told his dad that if he ever tried to do that to my Nissan car (car payment), I will go the police right away knowing that it is on my only vehicle I have.
Either your boyfriend bought the van and gave it to you as an outright gift

OR

You let boyfriend take advantage of you.

What if he or his son had caused a wreck with the van? Used it while committing a crime? Killed someone while irresponsible son and friends were driving around in it?

If he was "using you" to make a " straw man" purchase -- to evade insurance rates by insuring it as if you were the owner and driver rather than him -- the he is exploiting you!

If you knowingly allowed him to put it on your name for him to evade insurance rates, what YOU did is wrong and unethical
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Old 12-19-2015, 10:44 AM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ > Raleigh, NC
14,296 posts, read 17,491,099 times
Reputation: 22118
Quote:
Originally Posted by Petitegal74 View Post
Yes his dad paid for the van but put it in my name cause I can pay cheaper car insurance with a good driving record.
You all are thieves. That's insurance fraud.
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Old 12-19-2015, 01:03 PM
 
Location: Maryland
912 posts, read 591,710 times
Reputation: 1078
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jkgourmet View Post
You all are thieves. That's insurance fraud.
lol! Right?! There are so many things wrong with this story that I don't even know where to start. Sounds like trainwreck city.

The kid did not steal the van. The dad seemed okay with the kid having it, he said to give it to him. You committed insurance fraud. Sounds to me like you just don't like the kid. Fair enough, but grow up.

And yes, you should get him a gift. If you marry this man, he will be your son. Would you not gift your son because he potentially made a mistake (which in this case it doesn't sound like he did since the father said he could have the van. You just got your panties in a ruffle because it was in your name and you were committing a crime). I feel like this thread is Jerry Springer.
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Old 12-19-2015, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Southeast, where else?
3,914 posts, read 4,006,935 times
Reputation: 5781
Quote:
Originally Posted by Petitegal74 View Post
I did put a post on here 2 months ago talking about my boyfriend's son acting like a mooching freeloader. I made a decision not to buy any Christmas gifts for him. I feel that he took advantage of my kindness when I let him stay at my home couple months ago. He let his girlfriend stay there without paying rent and didn't clean up his dirty mess. I was done with him after he stole the van to drive it for himself which was in my name. I did ask for my van plate back. He gave it back to me and I gave him the car title. He got the van title in his name and get car insurance on his own without help from me. I made it clear to his dad that I wasn't interested to help his son out anymore after the van situation. He told his son. I am glad that I did put my foot down and told him that I am not that person he can't use for an ATM bank while he get a paycheck. My relationship with his dad had gotten better. His dad did accept that it was not a good idea to let his grown 29 year old adult son to live with us. We are best friends again and get along with respect. I told my friends that his son already got his Christmas gift: the van. He won't get anything else from me again. They told me that I should have a heart for Christmas and forgive him. I do forgive him for what he did to me but I can't help him out anymore. It would put me in debt that I can't afford to be in. My money had been much better after his son moved out. I am able to save money and buy Christmas gifts for my family.
You are too kind. I would have given him the finger and a good kick in the assets but, that's me. That man should have been paying rent, day one. It's not your fault he's down and out. Give him a week or two and that in and of itself is quite generous. It's time he learned that.


Sharks feed where they can be fed. That's why you see so many people laying back soaking up social benefits when they are fully capable of working on their own. Cut the "food" supply and guess what? They either migrate to SO's couches (like you) or, they realize work isn't so bad when you are starving.


Tough love. Administer it. In spades.
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Old 12-19-2015, 01:13 PM
 
Location: Maryland
912 posts, read 591,710 times
Reputation: 1078
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caleb Longstreet View Post
You are too kind. I would have given him the finger and a good kick in the assets but, that's me. That man should have been paying rent, day one. It's not your fault he's down and out. Give him a week or two and that in and of itself is quite generous. It's time he learned that.


Sharks feed where they can be fed. That's why you see so many people laying back soaking up social benefits when they are fully capable of working on their own. Cut the "food" supply and guess what? They either migrate to SO's couches (like you) or, they realize work isn't so bad when you are starving.


Tough love. Administer it. In spades.
No, she's not too kind. She is foolish. Most kids would do the same thing this kid did, if given the opportunity to live rent free. It's not his fault she has no idea what to do with children.

She doesn't sound much older than the child, but if she's going to try to date a man with kids, she better learn how to be a good parent real quick.

And not gifting the kid on Christmas, of all days, because the adults made a mess of things is not fair. Kids are always your kids, no matter their age. I'm almost 40 and my father still makes me an Easter Basket for Greek Easter every single year (filled with tons of stuff I can't eat because it has corn syrup in it, but the act still makes me feel loved) as well as a small gift for Christmas and my bday (he's not financially well off), and a box of chocolate for Valentine's Day.

I have made plenty of mistakes in my life. Parents love and gift unconditionally. It doesn't have to be extravagant; it's the thought that counts. And the message you would be sending by not gifting is a very clear one: that you're not the right woman to be dating a man with children. OP, you came to a board and asked for opinions. That's mine. Good luck to all of you.
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Old 12-19-2015, 01:51 PM
 
4,579 posts, read 6,140,145 times
Reputation: 5213
People if this is a true story stay out of it. If the guy has a 29 year old son this is a seasoned adult posting. I'm sure many know how this is going to play out so let it go.
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Old 12-19-2015, 02:16 PM
 
Location: Maryland
912 posts, read 591,710 times
Reputation: 1078
Quote:
Originally Posted by Caltovegas View Post
People if this is a true story stay out of it. If the guy has a 29 year old son this is a seasoned adult posting. I'm sure many know how this is going to play out so let it go.
I don't understand. Just because the man's son is 29yo does not mean the girlfriend is old enough to have a 29yo son, so how do you know it's a seasoned adult posting? Although, I do know how it's going to play out. Like Jerry Springer.
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Old 12-19-2015, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma USA
1,196 posts, read 782,026 times
Reputation: 4387
Thus, in typical CD fashion, we have gone from a kerfluffle over the blended family etiquette of Christmas gift for BF's son...

To grand theft auto...

To insurance fraud...

All in two pages
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Old 12-20-2015, 03:37 AM
 
33,027 posts, read 12,488,458 times
Reputation: 20932
Glad the van deal was resolved.

Box up the belongings he left behind and give them to him for Christmas.
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