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Old 12-22-2015, 11:46 AM
 
Location: Florida
4,092 posts, read 3,070,689 times
Reputation: 8623

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We host foreign exchange students. They are teens whose parents send them here for 10 months. Our student this year is 15 years old and she got our information in the middle of July and arrived four weeks later. We exchanged a few emails before her arrival. One of our students was notified only three days before she got on the plane. Before that, she didn't even know what state she'd be living in.

I also have a son who will be 15 in a few weeks. A family we know from one of his activities called to ask if he could go on a 10-day out-of-state trip with them. They called last week and he leaves on Saturday. Am I nervous to send him? Yes! He's never been away that long. Am I freaking out over the late notice? Of course not.

Is it possible that you are nervous about sending your son (which is totally understandable!) and are projecting your feelings onto something that's mostly a non-issue? Having six months notice as to who will be chaperoning an agency-run trip is not a necessity. You're talking about a high schooler, not a six-year-old who would need to get used to the idea for a while and might be thrown into meltdown mode if a sudden change is made. I totally get being nervous and apprehensive, but if no one has agreed that this is a big deal in a three-page thread, it's worth considering whether you're overreacting. It will be okay. Your son will be fine. If it turns out that they find someone who is totally inept or dangerous, you guys can cross that bridge when you get there, but I would not worry about that at this point.
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Old 12-22-2015, 11:59 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
10,864 posts, read 18,923,477 times
Reputation: 25123
Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
So, you think she and her husband don't know how babies are made? THEY caused the situation, I have no sympathy for them.
Not every pregnancy is planned, and not every unplanned pregnancy is unwanted. Sometimes birth control just doesn't work. Should the teacher and her husband have abstained in the months leading up to the trip to prevent this situation, or do you think they should have aborted so they wouldn't inconvenience you?
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Old 12-22-2015, 11:59 AM
 
Location: I am right here.
4,860 posts, read 3,720,200 times
Reputation: 15267
Exhibit A why teachers should NEVER be Facebook friends with parents of their students.

Calm down, OP.
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:02 PM
 
Location: Florida
4,092 posts, read 3,070,689 times
Reputation: 8623
Quote:
Originally Posted by PeachSalsa View Post
Exhibit A why teachers should NEVER be Facebook friends with parents of their students.

Calm down, OP.
Yeah, I'm surprised that any teachers actually friend their students! If I were a teacher, my page would be locked down and I'd use a different name. Eeks.
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:13 PM
 
Location: WI
2,820 posts, read 3,066,220 times
Reputation: 4815
Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
Someone else didn't out her after all

Looks like they posted it themselves last night. And that the "rumor" was started by her older kids. As I wasn't online last night, I missed all that.

You all can keep going and thinking that you are in a majority and that you 5 or 6 people represent a "plethora"... but if it was you, you'd be understandably upset. Or not. I guess maybe I just expect people to act in a more considerate way. Especially "professionals" who work with children.

My bad
No, if this were me and I KNEW the trip was non-refundable, I'd have gotten insurance.
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:49 PM
 
3,647 posts, read 9,316,475 times
Reputation: 5427
So the son being invited to a friend's last minute...do you know what adults will be there? Or are you be okay with not knowing or being told? Because at this point, I don't know. I'm not angry or saying he can't go, I'm wanting to KNOW and APPROVE... I don't let my kids go off with strangers, people I don't know. Some moms sell their children to sexual predators too. Of course, several of you have less concern for who will supervise your children, and that's fine. I've seen many of your posts and have read how well that's worked out for you in the past.

Being told that a certain person and her husband are going to be chaperones for a trip and then being told that they made a life decision after you've already committed or sending your 10 year old across an ocean without knowing who they will be staying with are two separate things. To someone who believes that sending their 10 year old to another country without knowing anything about the people that child will be staying with is okay, my wanting to know who my child will be chaperoned by may seem like overreaction. There are parents out there that take heroine in front of their children too, and see nothing wrong with it. I think that's wrong, but some do not. I think it's okay to let your 15 year old have half a can a beer once in awhile at home while others believe that allowing a child to sniff a wine cork at 20 is child abuse. Everybody parents differently.

I am friends with SEVERAL of my children's teachers, in real life and online. On their "everybody" facebook pages and their "real friends" pages. Before reacting to a situation, I step back, ask questions anonymously online (rarely), work through my feelings and thoughts. I would expect others to do the same.

I absolutely will get trip insurance if this ever arises again. I looked over the trip insurance and shrugged... my bad. Live and learn.
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:55 PM
 
3,647 posts, read 9,316,475 times
Reputation: 5427
As to the assertion that "no one agrees with you", I'd like to point out that reputation is anonymous. Just because others don't want to jump in and be attacked also for agreeing with me publicly, doesn't mean they don't
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:55 PM
 
Location: Raleigh NC
5,284 posts, read 4,571,724 times
Reputation: 13277
Just because you don't know what her plan is...doesn't mean she doesn't have a plan. I would also be dying to know what that plan is. you are not alone in that.


I don't think you will be out of pocket if it is postponed for any reason. Because, yes, you can't usually cancel, but those school tour companies will let you postpone. They are actually run by humans.

Set it aside, enjoy your holiday, and call her on January 4. If you don't get a satisfactory answer from her by the 9th, call the school principal.
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Old 12-22-2015, 12:59 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma USA
1,196 posts, read 783,497 times
Reputation: 4387
Thank the teacher for her and her husband's foresight in treating the students to such a profound lesson in biology -- the miracle of birth -- while on their upcoming field trip.
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Old 12-22-2015, 01:00 PM
 
Location: The analog world
15,676 posts, read 8,775,979 times
Reputation: 21027
Life happens. My suggestion is to get involved, so you'll have a voice in who replaces her as a chaperone. Choose to be part of the solution rather than the problem.
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