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Old 12-22-2015, 09:50 AM
 
3,647 posts, read 9,321,686 times
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We have paid for a trip for my high schooler to go to NYC with a group from school, chaperoned by a teacher and her husband, also employed by the school, next summer.

About a month ago, my son came home and said that there was a rumor going around that the teacher who organized the trip is pregnant, but that she denied it. So, I let it go. Today, on Facebook, a family member of hers "outed" her, and she responded to the post already, confirming the information.

Due date is the week of the trip.

In my opinion, she and her husband should have notified those of us with children signed up on the trip BEFORE releasing the info on social media... knowing that she and he are "friends" with most of the parents and their students.

Let me be clear... I'm not upset that she's pregnant, but that she hasn't contacted us to let us know who will be chaperoning my child on a 5 day trip more than 2,000 miles from home. We are still new to the area and I'm more than a little peeved... don't really know any of the other parents well enough to ask them. I trusted this woman and now... I feel at the very least that she showed a lack of concern for her students and their parents.

How long should I wait before asking what their alternate plan is and who are the alternate chaperones? I'm really peeved because I don't trust my children into the care of just anyone... especially not like this. I wouldn't have agreed to an unchaperoned trip or a trip where the chaperones were not pre-announced.
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Old 12-22-2015, 09:57 AM
 
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I wouldn't bother with it until after New Years
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:07 AM
 
Location: Arizona
1,599 posts, read 1,272,842 times
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Honestly I think you are overreacting. This trip isn't until summer, so at least six months away. That is more than enough time to find a new chaperone for the trip and I guarantee they will properly notify you. I'm sure another teacher would love to step in and I doubt the school will let just any teacher go. It would be someone who has been with the school for several years that the faculty knows well and trusts.

And the pregnant teacher has a right to tell or not the whoever she wants, whenever she wants in whatever order she deems fit. There are a hundred reasons why someone might need to cancel attending/chaperoning a preplanned school function and they are none of your business.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:10 AM
 
Location: Florida
4,111 posts, read 3,077,308 times
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What is your specific concern? They're going to find another chaperone, but the teacher's first priority upon finding out she was pregnant was probably not to worry about the parents of the teenage high school students attending a trip six months from now. I'd question as to who the new chaperone will be if you don't hear by the spring. This is not a pressing concern for the school right at this very moment. It will definitely be another trusted teacher; it's not like they're going to ask some random custodian, and they will have a man and a woman going, so you won't need to worry about that, either.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:10 AM
 
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Ok, this is what, seven months out from the trip? How do you know she wasn't working alternative plans but won't have them in place until after New Year's. It wasn't like she dropped a bomb on social media, someone else did let it out before she had the plans in place. You have at least until March before the need to panic.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:40 AM
 
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Well, I figured I'd wait until after school got back. That should give her plenty of time.

I never said I was panicking. Y'all are certainly a bunch of judgmental people. It's a wonder anyone asks a question on this forum at all.

What is my specific concern? Well, that I spent $2k on this already and it's non refundable and non transferable. It's not associated with the school in ANY WAY (other than a teacher from the school organized it), so I have no expectation that another teacher would just "step in". Seems like 3 months would be PLENTY of time to have an alternate plan in place and that she has had enough time to consider that since her due date is day 2 of the trip. This is a rural, very small and economically depressed area. The trip was first proposed a year in advance, to give everyone time to pay for it (Though it must be paid in full by early March). The average home price in the area here is less than $100k... the vast majority of students in the school are on the free lunch program... I'd think whoever the new chaperones are going to be will need time to pull together the funds for it. The teacher told us as a group that she and her husband had been saving for it for 6 months previous to even proposing the trip. ($2k for students, $2500 for adults - the cost of double room vs quad being the difference, plus food, souvenirs, transportation to the airport 2 hours away etc) 11 students are signed up. 3 are siblings. The more thought I put into this, the more I realize how inconsiderate it has been of them not to bring it to the group earlier.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:50 AM
 
Location: here
24,477 posts, read 28,782,510 times
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No one, for any reason, is required to announce their pregnancy before they are ready. She's not even 3 months along. That's standard time to announce. Maybe they've lost a baby in the past. Maybe it is a high risk pregnancy. I understand wanting an answer soon, but it is selfish to have expected one before now.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:50 AM
 
Location: Florida
4,111 posts, read 3,077,308 times
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Bring it to the group earlier? When is she due? It's only December, and if she's due the first week of July, that makes her only like 10 weeks pregnant. Most women don't tell everyone they know the minute the stick turns pink.

You did not mention that this was not a school trip. Either way, though, I'm sure that provisions will be made; no one would expect parents to allow a gaggle of 11 teenagers to go unsupervised. They wouldn't even be able to rent hotel room... this is just not going to happen. Someone will supervise, even if they haven't been chosen six months in advance of the trip. Is it through an agency of some sort? Many agencies require chaperones and I believe they do background checks on them (or require them to be done). My exchange is going on one in the spring, and the chaperones have not been announced yet, but they must be registered volunteers with active background checks on file.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Dallas TX
14,334 posts, read 20,592,632 times
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Definitely you are overreacting. Why? She is just three months. You have no idea the history she has had with pregnancies. I told everyone about my second pregnancy and miscarried. The next time around I waited until four months.

The trip is seven months away, the pregnancy is now known. I am sure there will be alternative plans.
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Old 12-22-2015, 10:57 AM
 
3,647 posts, read 9,321,686 times
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She's due early June. The sonogram she posted says 11 weeks, dated December 10th. Someone knew about November 17th, when son came home from an event with the rumor. (I checked my calendar for the date of that event) So, she told SOMEONE in the school, and DENIED it.

Specifically, my concern is that if they cannot find a chaperone, I will be out of pocket $2k. I would go, but I'm having surgery in April. My husband will not be able to take the time off work, as he won't have a year at his current job until late July.
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