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Old 01-14-2016, 12:54 PM
 
Location: In a vehicle.
4,553 posts, read 2,781,582 times
Reputation: 7322

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Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaBear999 View Post
Am I over-reacting? Hubby says I am. A neighbor down the street from us (we live in a subdivision, all of top of each other) posted a 10 second video of my daughter to his Facebook page. He is a big sports fan and put his sport team hat on her and filmed her wearing it with a quote along the lines this is what happens when your child hangs out with my child. Hubby knows the neighbor well as our kids play together. It bothers ME. All of his 500 friends are seeing this video and feel like he should have asked me or hubby if it was ok to post. Hubby told me to text/tell him directly if I had a problem with it. Yes, I have lots of pics on my Facebook page of my kids, which is private, but funny thing is, I do not have one single video of my children on Facebook. Thoughts?
So? Make some videos of your kids, maybe someone might find them funny...Unless the vid shows something illegal, I;d think you're just being too much a "Helicopter" parent.
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Old 01-14-2016, 01:06 PM
 
Location: Yucaipa, California
9,599 posts, read 17,719,404 times
Reputation: 6248
Its the sign of the times.
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:00 PM
 
1,040 posts, read 696,549 times
Reputation: 817
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaBear999 View Post
Am I over-reacting? Hubby says I am. A neighbor down the street from us (we live in a subdivision, all of top of each other) posted a 10 second video of my daughter to his Facebook page. He is a big sports fan and put his sport team hat on her and filmed her wearing it with a quote along the lines this is what happens when your child hangs out with my child. Hubby knows the neighbor well as our kids play together. It bothers ME. All of his 500 friends are seeing this video and feel like he should have asked me or hubby if it was ok to post. Hubby told me to text/tell him directly if I had a problem with it. Yes, I have lots of pics on my Facebook page of my kids, which is private, but funny thing is, I do not have one single video of my children on Facebook. Thoughts?
You are sooooooooooooo funny. You do know Facebook for a fee lets folks view stuff marked private or for friends only. Background search companies use it all the time. And they use facial recognition software so even if your name is not there they can view it.

My daughter who is good with computers for instance I was curious who my niece was dating but she marks it private. In like 10 seconds using a photo search feature we got into her locked instrgram account so see her stuff. I was just a bit curious since we were meeting him for first time that night. But it was amazing in a matter of seconds the locked stuff my daughter could open
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:42 PM
 
11,095 posts, read 6,596,198 times
Reputation: 20087
Quote:
Originally Posted by DelightfulNYC View Post
My daughter who is good with computers for instance I was curious who my niece was dating but she marks it private. In like 10 seconds using a photo search feature we got into her locked instrgram account so see her stuff. I was just a bit curious since we were meeting him for first time that night. But it was amazing in a matter of seconds the locked stuff my daughter could open
What an odd thing to do, hack into your niece's Instagram account. Why not just "follow" her on Instagram if you are that interested in her life?
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:44 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 1,629,027 times
Reputation: 7974
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguylh View Post
Exactly.

I say this NOT to jump onto the original poster, at all, but I have encountered parents who are paranoid over photos/videos of their children existing outside their control, circulating in such ways, and frankly 99.997% of the time it's nothing to be alarmed or "offended" about and is in fact the most natural thing in the world that such photos will exist. You have school plays, birthday parties, sporting events, and especially close friends/relatives who will think your child is cute and--egads!--may wish to take a photo.

Especially in this case, it's a friend and your two children play together--frankly, if I were that person, I'd be very highly offended at the idea that I have to ask permission to take a photo/video of our children playing together and would consider that a "breach of etiquette." I take such photos all the time in such situations, it's totally natural and harmless. It's what taking photos is all about. I can perhaps agree with you asking that he not "tag" anything, but beyond that, please--unless there's a very highly sensitive custody situation or witness protection program situation going on, don't make a mountain out of a pebble. Those 500 people who see it are probably going to enjoy it, that photo/video will be a blessing. Don't let paranoia or misguided ideas about how a child has a right to privacy from photos or how "their image should be theirs to decide who can see it" like we're all Amish now spoil it for those 500 people.

I say this as a hobbyist photographer, and as a parent. In public, as a general rule you have NO RIGHT to the expectation of privacy ("upskirts" and such being obvious exceptions), and really there's no harm likely to come from a photo of your child being "out there." The custody and "crazy ex husband" situations notwithstanding (those are probably like 0.003% of the time and not worth changing photography over), the odds that a photo of your child being taken by another causing any real harm as is likely as me waking up to find Jennifer Lawrence and Jennifer Lopez warming up my mattress, and all of these things I hear about "a child's right to privacy" are silly to me, frankly.

There are many rebuttals I hear to this, which I won't cover in this post lest it grow long (but if they appear after this post I may).
This times 1,000.

What if you child is playing in the park and a news crew is filming a fluff piece about summer recreation? It's going to air whether you like it or not. You only own your image for commercial purposes, not entertainment or news purposes.
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:51 PM
 
Location: Spring Hill Florida
12,135 posts, read 12,682,878 times
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I guess the OP would not allow her child to appear in class photos taken at schoool either.
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Old 01-14-2016, 03:29 PM
 
Location: Huntsville, AL
2,850 posts, read 768,530 times
Reputation: 5396
Human trafficking has no age limit. I'd talk to my neighbor, and ask them to remove the video.
If they comply, you're done... If they don't comply, complain to Facebook about his post, and they should remove it.
Keep talking to Facebook until it is to your satisfaction.


Good luck
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Old 01-14-2016, 03:53 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 1,629,027 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jukesgrrl View Post
I absolutely agree with you. NO ONE should be posting photos or videos of other people (let alone their children!) without permission. I've been a stalking victim. I don't wish that on anyone. People who are so eager to have exciting Facebook pages have NO IDEA what kind of danger they could be putting another person in by posting photos without permission.

If someone gives you permission, fine. If someone is a public figure and they willingly pose for a photo with you, post it.

But keep other private citizens off your Facebook pages unless they specifically tell you it's OK. Just because some people don't respect the boundaries of others doesn't make those boundaries wrong. We should all have the freedom to set our limits and to set limits for our children. You have no idea how many pedophiles are out there trolling Facebook for photos of kids they can sexualize.
I'm sorry, but the idea of being a 'private citizen' goes out the door the minute you are visible from the street. In today's 24/7 digital world, we are ALL public figures whether we like it or not.
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Old 01-14-2016, 04:53 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 1,629,027 times
Reputation: 7974
Quote:
Originally Posted by UserName14289 View Post
It doesn't matter what the OP is worried about or why. At the end of the day, none of us have the right to post things without passing it by the person being posted about. Has society lost all sense of tact and decorum? What happened to a little something called manners?
You must have read a different Bill of Rights than I have. You might have been mistakenly taught that you are not part of the greater public world and somehow hold the copyright to all possible images and references to you and your minor children, but you are, indeed part of that public world.

This is a dangerously anti-social concept that should be addressed once and for all by the national legislature.
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Old 01-14-2016, 05:07 PM
 
3,071 posts, read 1,629,027 times
Reputation: 7974
Quote:
Originally Posted by southwest88 View Post
Yah, yah. & was the 2nd grader in question in public at the time the footage was shot? I don't see it here anywhere. The mom's complaint is that her daughter was videoed wearing some sports hat (put on her by the neighbor, presumably), next to the neighbor's house. Which says to me likely in the neighbor's yard - not in public, to my mind. It's easy enough to check - just ask the daughter, or even look @ the footage & see exactly where it is.


If the child wasn't in public @ the time, then the defense you're putting forth goes up in smoke. Broadly speaking, it sounds like enticement - the neighbor gets the 2nd grader over there - or sees her playing with his kid(s) & decides - on the spur of the moment? - to put his sports team hat on her head (which he just happens to have to hand, plus videocam or smartphone, whatever he used, also ready to hand), have her say some sports related nonsense (& how many trial runs did that take?), shoots the video, makes sure it's what he wants, doesn't ask the parents for permission, posts the footage to Facebook.
I am very sorry for whatever must have happened to you in the past, but this point of view is completely paranoid and patently ridiculous. I weep for those who experience your logic first hand.
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