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Your talking to some one who literally has no heat in their house lol. I know what reality is I live it. But I also believe love conquers all. You may have very little but if you have love and family then you can make it. Some times I go hungry and go without, but its okay. You dont need money just need to get creative. Ppl have raised families with less and done just fine.
How is "love" doing at heating your house that has small children in it?
OP, you're not ready for a baby. You're not. Certainly not financially, and it doesn't seem like you really fathom just how much your life is going to change by having one either.
I have a friend, she is 37 now. She got married in her late 20's, and wanted to have a baby. Problem was, her husband was a real piece of work. He couldn't take care of himself, let alone a child, or even pay for anything. Complete deadbeat. By the time my friend filed for divorce, all he did was drink and smoke on the sofa all day and watch tv, while she went to work every day supporting both of them. She gave up any thought of having a child with him, she had no time, and no money to give that child what it would need.
So she got a divorce. Still wanted a baby of course, even started to obsess about it a bit, just like you are. At her age, she knows she's basically out of time, but she's still single. Can't afford to have a baby on her own, and she knows it.
But you know what? My wife and I had a child, she is 2 now. We let my friend see firsthand just how hard it is to raise a child. My wife is a stay at home mom now. We don't have to worry about daycare expenses or one of us having to stay home when she's sick. We have it a lot easier than most couples.
However, the sheer exhaustion of raising a child wears on you. My friend came over to "assist" for a couple days when my wife was sick and she was in between jobs. She saw just how hard it was and it finally clicked with her. She was NOT ready to have a baby. In fact, she's now changed her mind completely. She understands she is not responsible enough to have a child, nor financially able to care for one properly either.
You need to concentrate on your own life first. Get to a stable place before deciding to start a family. Whether that includes a guy or not is up to you, but you should be prepared to go it alone if you have to, and right now, you can't do that.
Not saying she should just sayin if worst came to worst. She could make it.
But yes I think you should be married before having a baby.
Responsible people don't have babies knowing that they'll barely make it, and might not be able to feed themselves and heat the house.That isn't fair to the child. At all.
Your talking to some one who literally has no heat in their house lol. I know what reality is I live it. But I also believe love conquers all. You may have very little but if you have love and family then you can make it. Some times I go hungry and go without, but its okay. You dont need money just need to get creative. Ppl have raised families with less and done just fine.
So... you think it's a good idea to raise a baby in a house with no heat or food? Do you expect a crying baby to just "go without"?
He is pushing you off, so obviously he doesn't feel the same. The whole "wants to wait until he gets out of the military before getting involved" is ridiculous. Either he (A) doesn't want anything serious , or (B) doesn't want anything serious with you.
So your whole "relationship" with this guy you have met twice exists only between your ears.
He just doesn't like to text. I just have to show him that I am the kind of girl he should be with. I am a quality person. maybe he just doesn't want anything serious right now? But he said when he is out he wants a wife and to have kids. I just have to really show him that I am best for him
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