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Old 01-17-2016, 12:13 PM
 
10,090 posts, read 6,506,364 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eevee188 View Post
Low dose hormonal birth control intended to regulate periods and control acne does not act as a contraceptive and that's a very dangerous myth. Only actual, normal strength birth control works as birth control.
That isn't true. You should google that before you post it. Why would they call it "birth control" if it was just for acne and to regulate periods?
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Old 01-17-2016, 12:28 PM
 
1,039 posts, read 607,861 times
Reputation: 1730
I had the dialogue about unwanted babies with my daughter when she was Old Enough to Ask.


Then I had it again, and again over the years


How unnecessary and evil it is


I'm constantly stunned by how many ppl on CD post to ask "how did you approach this with your teen"


I approached everything, over the years, in natural conversation. There was literally nothing my kids couldn't ask me or discuss with me.


My daughter would no sooner have had an unwanted pregnancy at Any Age, than she would fly to the moon.


I didn't have to have The Talk with her as it was open and discussed pretty much since infancy. All of it. Including Periods etc and How You Make Babies which she thought sounded DISGUSTING.
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Old 01-17-2016, 12:33 PM
 
752 posts, read 537,461 times
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My daughter's not a teenager yet, but I remember being a teenager. My dad put a lot of pressure on me to take birth control. I told him I was not having sex, but he didn't believe me. Finally mom said I should just take it, so that I'd be ready when I did decide I wanted to have sex. (She probably believed I was having sex too, but didn't want to say it to my face.) I took birth control for over six months, and never had sex during that period.

Eventually I did start dating a guy that wanted sex, and pressured me into it. But that wasn't until long after I quit birth control. I didn't tell my parents, because I didn't want to give dad the satisfaction of thinking, "I knew she was having sex!" Ironically, I might not have given into my boyfriend's pressure to have sex so much, if it wasn't from all the pressure I felt from society and my own parents to feel like having sex is "normal" and not doing it is abnormal.

I think parents should talk to their kids about sex and birth control, but should not automatically assume that their child is lying to them about not having sex, or force them to take birth control. Not believing that your child is not having sex sends them a message that you expect them to have it, and that you think it's abnormal for a child their age not to.

If you believe your child doesn't trust you enough to tell you if they're having sex, it might be a good idea to schedule regular appointments with somebody they can talk to about this stuff, that can help them get birth control if they do need it.
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Old 01-17-2016, 01:51 PM
 
15,762 posts, read 13,195,357 times
Reputation: 19651
Quote:
Originally Posted by eevee188 View Post
Low dose hormonal birth control intended to regulate periods and control acne does not act as a contraceptive and that's a very dangerous myth. Only actual, normal strength birth control works as birth control.
According to my daughters gynecologist you are wrong.
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Old 01-17-2016, 01:54 PM
 
10,090 posts, read 6,506,364 times
Reputation: 23714
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
According to my daughters gynecologist you are wrong.
According to my GYN, the entire world wide web, mayo clinic, etc they are wrong. But I am glad a misconception (pun intended) could be cleared up
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Old 01-17-2016, 02:13 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
85,025 posts, read 98,908,697 times
Reputation: 31466
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonnie Jean McGee View Post
I had the dialogue about unwanted babies with my daughter when she was Old Enough to Ask.


Then I had it again, and again over the years


How unnecessary and evil it is


I'm constantly stunned by how many ppl on CD post to ask "how did you approach this with your teen"


I approached everything, over the years, in natural conversation. There was literally nothing my kids couldn't ask me or discuss with me.


My daughter would no sooner have had an unwanted pregnancy at Any Age, than she would fly to the moon.


I didn't have to have The Talk with her as it was open and discussed pretty much since infancy. All of it. Including Periods etc and How You Make Babies which she thought sounded DISGUSTING.
I knew this was coming. "Talk to them about sex starting in infancy, etc". First of all, if one hasn't talked to their kid before, you have to start where you are. Heck, even if you have talked about it before, you have to start where you (and she) are now. Sure, preteens and many young teens think sex is disgusting. That's probably a good thing, actually. Keeps them from experimenting. However, once they've crossed the Rubicon so to speak, it's a different story.

Your daughter was lucky.
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Old 01-17-2016, 05:56 PM
 
1,039 posts, read 607,861 times
Reputation: 1730
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katarina Witt View Post
I knew this was coming. "Talk to them about sex starting in infancy, etc". First of all, if one hasn't talked to their kid before, you have to start where you are. Heck, even if you have talked about it before, you have to start where you (and she) are now. Sure, preteens and many young teens think sex is disgusting. That's probably a good thing, actually. Keeps them from experimenting. However, once they've crossed the Rubicon so to speak, it's a different story.

Your daughter was lucky.

I was more worried about my Son.


Hes the one I used to bang on about BC to.


All it takes is one girl, etc etc. (he was/is popular)


With a girl, you only have to worry about her. With a boy, its everyone elses kids you have to worry about.

Last edited by Bonnie Jean McGee; 01-17-2016 at 06:05 PM..
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Old 01-17-2016, 06:08 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
85,025 posts, read 98,908,697 times
Reputation: 31466
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonnie Jean McGee View Post
I was more worried about my Son.


Hes the one I used to bang on about BC to.


All it takes is one girl, etc etc. (he was/is popular)


With a girl, you only have to worry about her. With a boy, its everyone elses kids you have to worry about.
Well, you were talking about your daughter in the post I quoted.

I really don't get your point about the difference between a daughter and a son.
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Old 01-17-2016, 06:18 PM
 
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
9,531 posts, read 13,372,671 times
Reputation: 20041
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katarina Witt View Post
Huh?
A girl can only present you with the results of one mistake at any given time, OTOH a popular boy/player can present you with multiple results.
With your daughter you hope and pray she doesn't forget to take her pills, with your son you hope and pray that all those other girls don't forget to take their pills
(and that dear son doesn't just take the girls at their word and uses a condom anyway)
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Old 01-17-2016, 06:58 PM
 
15,836 posts, read 18,476,214 times
Reputation: 25622
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
My daughter, 17 and a junior in high school, is in her first romantic relationship. They started going out in November. She's very private about it. We've met him a couple of times and he's very shy, but he seems to treat her well and be a nice enough guy. He's 15.

I have always talked very openly about sex and birth control with her. It hasn't been a matter of one talk about the birds and bees without ever mentioning it again, but an ongoing conversation. Since she started seeing this boy I've talked to her several times about sex, the gist of which has been:

(1) I advise you not to have sex yet because I think you're too young.
(2) If you do have sex, use birth control.
(3) I will help you obtain BC if you need it, no questions asked.
(4) If you end up having sex without BC, tell me right away so we can get you the Plan B "morning after" pill.

Her response is always "I'm not going to have sex! You're being so annoying!" Or something along those lines.

She's a good kid--good grades, responsible, smart, practical, not rebellious. That I know of she and her peers aren't drinking or using drugs. I may be naive, but I have not seen any signs of it at all.

She has a car so she has a lot of freedom. She and the boyfriend sometimes "drive around" after school. I'm sure the "driving around" involves parking somewhere and making out. We've told her that she can't go to his house if his parents aren't there, but I don't really have a way to monitor that. I haven't met his parents.

My question is: Should I just insist she go on BC? Make her an appointment with the OB/GYN and tell her she has to pick a method? Or insist on the implant or one of the long-term injections? What did you do with your teenagers at this age?

Thanks for any advice you can give.
You do realize that when she is 18 and he is 16 she will be at risk of being considered an adult having sex with a minor.
I would be just as concerned about this 15 year old boys parents...Maybe they aren't ready for him to have sex, that is very young.
There is quite a maturity difference.
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