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Old 02-10-2016, 02:31 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
39,026 posts, read 37,656,456 times
Reputation: 73626

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Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Whether it is cute or not today is moot.
It's NOT cute today, and even if some posters think it is, that is NOT the point.

Yes, it would annoy me, and I don't hate children. In fact, I have three.

He's not a puppy. He's not a toddler. He is TEN, which is plenty old enough to know better. If he's "with it" enough to ride rides alone and go to the lounge area alone, he's "with it" enough to understand boundaries.

Of COURSE "most" people are going to say, "He's fine!" when you come in to take him away. THAT is the polite response, which we all know is not always the most HONEST response.
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:34 PM
 
4,236 posts, read 3,028,074 times
Reputation: 6947
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
AFAIC intruding on other people's vacations ISN'T well behaved. Plopping down and eating breakfast at someone else' table ISN'T well behaved regardless of whether it is a "restaurant".
^^^^ This.

Although people may be polite and let him join their group, that doesn't mean they don't find it intrusive. I think asking to sit with another family/group at a restaurant is rude. It's one thing to chat up random strangers, but it's another thing to ask to join people as they eat with their families.
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:35 PM
 
Location: Wonderland
40,885 posts, read 32,642,286 times
Reputation: 57020
Here's how I see it:

A very casual lounge filled with parents and kids. A TV playing Disney cartoons constantly. Kids sort of milling around, sometimes sitting with family, sometimes sitting at kid tables watching cartoons. Not a particularly quiet, or "grown up" atmosphere. Friendly kid walks up to our family group (which includes kids), and asks if he can join us. Big grin breaks out across my face and I say, "Sure - if it's OK with your parents!" Then I catch parent's eye, give the thumbs' up, and enjoy the interaction. If said cute kid gets too rude, or too loud, or too dominating, I tell him that he needs to settle down a bit or I'm going to send him back over to his parents' table. If he persists - which is doubtful based on the OP's description of her child - I'd just stand up, say, "Hey, buddy, let's go find your parents," and I'd take him over to their table. But that's not the likely scenario because most likely, he and my kids would be chattering away about WDW and it wouldn't be awkward at all.

You know, the parade atmosphere reminds me of the Mardi Gras parades I take my kids and grandkids to in Shreveport, LA (the family friendly ones). It's pretty crowded but the crowd is sort of fluid. Families have their "space" but there's lots of movement and some up and down, some people standing, or jumping to their feet, some people sitting the entire time, either on the curb or in chairs they brought, but it's close quarters even though families tend to stand or sit sort of in the same area. So in that sort of parade environment, it wouldn't be at all unusual for a kid to strike up a jovial conversation with my kids or grandkids and to stand and even sit with us off and on, yelling, jumping up and down, chattering and laughing - in fact, this very thing has happened just about every time we've gone to the parades. So it just doesn't seem strange or awkward to me.

I don't think the OP is talking about her son going up to people or families in restaurants and asking to sit with them. Of course that would be intrusive. But I am sitting here thinking about family vacations to places like the Smoky Mountains, Gatlinburg, etc, when we'd be staying at a big hotel and we'd go down for the casual breakfast buffet. My kids would be up and down getting their stuff. They might see friendly kids they'd seen at the pool the night before, or run into somewhere else, and they might sit with them, or have them sit with us. This is in a very casual, family friendly, kid oriented environment like WDW lounges are. I just don't see anything particularly intrusive or strange about a friendly kid joining in in such a situation.

Of course, that would be different if we were sitting as a family at the local Italian restaurant. I'd think it was odd then. But that's not what the OP is describing.

I want to add though, that we spent several years living in Germany when the kids were growing up. In Germany, it is customary to sit at a table with another person or group or family if the restaurant is crowded and there are empty spaces at a table. Personally, I found that local tradition to be very pleasant and never felt weird about it. Also, they don't "queue" there like we do in the US - they can and will just cut right in line and they don't look at it as rude at all. You just better not let a space open up or it will be filled by someone who was behind you a minute ago! Also, even in pretty nice restaurants, people often bring their dogs in and they lay under the table - so you may find yourself with a stranger sitting at your table, who has also brought his dog who is now at your feet! So maybe this much more relaxed and less "don't infringe on my personal space" attitude just rubbed off on my family and gave us more of a sense of acceptance than is common, I don't know. All I know is that I'm glad we're that way because we've had a lot of fun, interesting interactions with strangers over the years and we have some memories that still bring a smile to my face when I think of those people I will probably never see again.

Last edited by KathrynAragon; 02-10-2016 at 02:50 PM..
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:37 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
39,026 posts, read 37,656,456 times
Reputation: 73626
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Here's how I see it:

A very casual lounge filled with parents and kids. A TV playing Disney cartoons constantly. Kids sort of milling around, sometimes sitting with family, sometimes sitting at kid tables watching cartoons. Not a particularly quiet, or "grown up" atmosphere. Friendly kid walks up to our family group (which includes kids), and asks if he can join us. Big grin breaks out across my face and I say, "Sure - if it's OK with your parents!" Then I catch parent's eye, give the thumbs' up, and enjoy the interaction. If said cute kid gets too rude, or too loud, or too dominating, I tell him that he needs to settle down a bit or I'm going to send him back over to his parents' table. If he persists - which is doubtful based on the OP's description of her child - I'd just stand up, say, "Hey, buddy, let's go find your parents," and I'd take him over to their table. But that's not the likely scenario because most likely, he and my kids would be chattering away about WDW and it wouldn't be awkward at all.
That's a very nice way of seeing it. Not necessarily the reality of the situation, though.
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:52 PM
 
Location: Wonderland
40,885 posts, read 32,642,286 times
Reputation: 57020
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
That's a very nice way of seeing it. Not necessarily the reality of the situation, though.
It sounds like it to me, from what the OP has described. She didn't describe a restaurant style dining area. This is a lounge at WDW, very kid oriented with Disney cartoons playing constantly and kids mulling about, from what I can tell from the description. It's not like they were eating as a family at Ruth Cris Steak House and some random kid came over and plopped down at the table.
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
39,026 posts, read 37,656,456 times
Reputation: 73626
You can look up photos of the club level lounges at the WDW resorts that have them. They are like lobbies, with a buffet, tables and designated seating areas with upholstered furniture.

It's not a state dinner, sure, but it's not your house either.

Just like the continental breakfast at any hotel, it's a public space, and with that come some (sometimes unwritten) rules. The grandmother who wore her pajamas to the breakfast buffet at the last Embassy Suites we stayed at obviously didn't think that mattered, but you could tell by the facial expressions of other diners that there were many who disagreed with her.
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Old 02-10-2016, 02:59 PM
 
Location: Charlotte Area
3,165 posts, read 2,895,274 times
Reputation: 3519
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Here's how I see it:

A very casual lounge filled with parents and kids. A TV playing Disney cartoons constantly. Kids sort of milling around, sometimes sitting with family, sometimes sitting at kid tables watching cartoons. Not a particularly quiet, or "grown up" atmosphere. Friendly kid walks up to our family group (which includes kids), and asks if he can join us. Big grin breaks out across my face and I say, "Sure - if it's OK with your parents!" Then I catch parent's eye, give the thumbs' up, and enjoy the interaction. If said cute kid gets too rude, or too loud, or too dominating, I tell him that he needs to settle down a bit or I'm going to send him back over to his parents' table. If he persists - which is doubtful based on the OP's description of her child - I'd just stand up, say, "Hey, buddy, let's go find your parents," and I'd take him over to their table. But that's not the likely scenario because most likely, he and my kids would be chattering away about WDW and it wouldn't be awkward at all.

You know, the parade atmosphere reminds me of the Mardi Gras parades I take my kids and grandkids to in Shreveport, LA (the family friendly ones). It's pretty crowded but the crowd is sort of fluid. Families have their "space" but there's lots of movement and some up and down, some people standing, or jumping to their feet, some people sitting the entire time, either on the curb or in chairs they brought, but it's close quarters even though families tend to stand or sit sort of in the same area. So in that sort of parade environment, it wouldn't be at all unusual for a kid to strike up a jovial conversation with my kids or grandkids and to stand and even sit with us off and on, yelling, jumping up and down, chattering and laughing - in fact, this very thing has happened just about every time we've gone to the parades. So it just doesn't seem strange or awkward to me.

I don't think the OP is talking about her son going up to people or families in restaurants and asking to sit with them. Of course that would be intrusive. But I am sitting here thinking about family vacations to places like the Smoky Mountains, Gatlinburg, etc, when we'd be staying at a big hotel and we'd go down for the casual breakfast buffet. My kids would be up and down getting their stuff. They might see friendly kids they'd seen at the pool the night before, or run into somewhere else, and they might sit with them, or have them sit with us. This is in a very casual, family friendly, kid oriented environment like WDW lounges are. I just don't see anything particularly intrusive or strange about a friendly kid joining in in such a situation.

Of course, that would be different if we were sitting as a family at the local Italian restaurant. I'd think it was odd then. But that's not what the OP is describing.

I want to add though, that we spent several years living in Germany when the kids were growing up. In Germany, it is customary to sit at a table with another person or group or family if the restaurant is crowded and there are empty spaces at a table. Personally, I found that local tradition to be very pleasant and never felt weird about it. Also, they don't "queue" there like we do in the US - they can and will just cut right in line and they don't look at it as rude at all. You just better not let a space open up or it will be filled by someone who was behind you a minute ago! Also, even in pretty nice restaurants, people often bring their dogs in and they lay under the table - so you may find yourself with a stranger sitting at your table, who has also brought his dog who is now at your feet! So maybe this much more relaxed and less "don't infringe on my personal space" attitude just rubbed off on my family and gave us more of a sense of acceptance than is common, I don't know. All I know is that I'm glad we're that way because we've had a lot of fun, interesting interactions with strangers over the years and we have some memories that still bring a smile to my face when I think of those people I will probably never see again.
Except sometimes the 10 year old is by himself and his other family members aren't with him. That's where the problem comes in I think.
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:05 PM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,319,241 times
Reputation: 32238
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
It sounds like it to me, from what the OP has described. She didn't describe a restaurant style dining area. This is a lounge at WDW, very kid oriented with Disney cartoons playing constantly and kids mulling about, from what I can tell from the description. It's not like they were eating as a family at Ruth Cris Steak House and some random kid came over and plopped down at the table.
The Disney concierge lounges are very similar to the breakfast room in any hotel. There are groups of tables and chairs and a buffet. There is usually a couch and a few arm chairs and one or two kiddie tables. It's not the norm, at least from my experiences enjoying Mickey-shaped pancakes and Mickey-shaped rice kripsy treats and Mickey-shaped cookies and Mickey-shaped cheese and crackers, for a child from family A to invite himself to join a table occupied by family X. Kids usually eat at the kiddie table or with their own families.

It's not a kids' version happy hour. That is provided in other parts of the hotels. It's light meals and snacks, in a dining area, with Mickey-inspired food.

Last edited by DewDropInn; 02-10-2016 at 03:44 PM..
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:24 PM
 
11,229 posts, read 9,225,730 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
That's a very nice way of seeing it. Not necessarily the reality of the situation, though.
There is no one reality of the situation. You just don't get to know who is going to be annoyed and who isn't. The best policy is to seek to the lesser "tolerance", if you will. And since it going to be indisputable damned soon, why not address it now?
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Old 02-10-2016, 03:25 PM
 
10,090 posts, read 6,489,790 times
Reputation: 23714
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Here's how I see it:

A very casual lounge filled with parents and kids. A TV playing Disney cartoons constantly. Kids sort of milling around, sometimes sitting with family, sometimes sitting at kid tables watching cartoons. Not a particularly quiet, or "grown up" atmosphere. Friendly kid walks up to our family group (which includes kids), and asks if he can join us. Big grin breaks out across my face and I say, "Sure - if it's OK with your parents!" Then I catch parent's eye, give the thumbs' up, and enjoy the interaction. If said cute kid gets too rude, or too loud, or too dominating, I tell him that he needs to settle down a bit or I'm going to send him back over to his parents' table. If he persists - which is doubtful based on the OP's description of her child - I'd just stand up, say, "Hey, buddy, let's go find your parents," and I'd take him over to their table. But that's not the likely scenario because most likely, he and my kids would be chattering away about WDW and it wouldn't be awkward at all.

You know, the parade atmosphere reminds me of the Mardi Gras parades I take my kids and grandkids to in Shreveport, LA (the family friendly ones). It's pretty crowded but the crowd is sort of fluid. Families have their "space" but there's lots of movement and some up and down, some people standing, or jumping to their feet, some people sitting the entire time, either on the curb or in chairs they brought, but it's close quarters even though families tend to stand or sit sort of in the same area. So in that sort of parade environment, it wouldn't be at all unusual for a kid to strike up a jovial conversation with my kids or grandkids and to stand and even sit with us off and on, yelling, jumping up and down, chattering and laughing - in fact, this very thing has happened just about every time we've gone to the parades. So it just doesn't seem strange or awkward to me.

I don't think the OP is talking about her son going up to people or families in restaurants and asking to sit with them. Of course that would be intrusive. But I am sitting here thinking about family vacations to places like the Smoky Mountains, Gatlinburg, etc, when we'd be staying at a big hotel and we'd go down for the casual breakfast buffet. My kids would be up and down getting their stuff. They might see friendly kids they'd seen at the pool the night before, or run into somewhere else, and they might sit with them, or have them sit with us. This is in a very casual, family friendly, kid oriented environment like WDW lounges are. I just don't see anything particularly intrusive or strange about a friendly kid joining in in such a situation.

Of course, that would be different if we were sitting as a family at the local Italian restaurant. I'd think it was odd then. But that's not what the OP is describing.

I want to add though, that we spent several years living in Germany when the kids were growing up. In Germany, it is customary to sit at a table with another person or group or family if the restaurant is crowded and there are empty spaces at a table. Personally, I found that local tradition to be very pleasant and never felt weird about it. Also, they don't "queue" there like we do in the US - they can and will just cut right in line and they don't look at it as rude at all. You just better not let a space open up or it will be filled by someone who was behind you a minute ago! Also, even in pretty nice restaurants, people often bring their dogs in and they lay under the table - so you may find yourself with a stranger sitting at your table, who has also brought his dog who is now at your feet! So maybe this much more relaxed and less "don't infringe on my personal space" attitude just rubbed off on my family and gave us more of a sense of acceptance than is common, I don't know. All I know is that I'm glad we're that way because we've had a lot of fun, interesting interactions with strangers over the years and we have some memories that still bring a smile to my face when I think of those people I will probably never see again.
This explains it quite well. Not to mention it wasn't even meals. It was mostly snacks and drinks, help your self style. People milled around, even moved table to table. People came in and grabbed snacks to go. It was not a restaurant. Not at all. Sometimes strangers would chat about their plans, or ask advice. Some times CMs who worked there would chat with you about your day. It was all very laid back.

But I have given up, people are trying to make something out of this it isn't. I have gotten enough helpful feedback. I, as an introvert, was asking if this extroverted behavior was a problem. Because I wasn't sure. But I did get some great and helpful advice, and I will hold on to that and let the mean girls club do their thing.
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