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I was interested in this thread because I thought it was going to be helpful hints and tips for parenting. Isn't that the purpose of this whole forum? Even though I've been a parent (step, bio and adoptive) to 7 for 40 years, I still have much to learn and we still have 2 at home.
I like to hear what has worked for others. And sometimes I offer my own experiences but mostly I ask for advice. The tone of the OP was not so much to offer tips but to brag about how her kids turned out so well because she was so perfect. That set many off and this thread did not go too well for her or anybody else.
I sincerely hope she can get some help for her serious problems.
I am a healthy, well-educated, productive member of society.
And I have a tattoo.
And my parents have no idea it exists because it is on my hip.
So one probably shouldn't get too smug about their child being tattoo-less.
My friend hid her behind the ear tattoo from her parents for about 4 years. Another friend hid a rib tattoo from her dad for about a year. Yet another friend hid a septum piercing as a teen from her parents all throughout high school. She would just flip it up into her nose when she got home, and they never knew it was there.
People often want their opinion to be known, yet what they say is of zero importance and will never have an impact on anything. For several years, I served on the board of a 501C3 organization and when we had business meetings, all attendees wanted to give their opinion on any subject that came up.
Since this was unduly time consuming, it was decided if someone had a notion of something needing to be done, then that person would be appointed to take care of the new suggestion. It cut down on their urgency to speak.
My two children grew up to be fine, upstanding adults. I think they did this in spite of their parents.
People often want their opinion to be known, yet what they say is of zero importance and will never have an impact on anything. For several years, I served on the board of a 501C3 organization and when we had business meetings, all attendees wanted to give their opinion on any subject that came up.
Since this was unduly time consuming, it was decided if someone had a notion of something needing to be done, then that person would be appointed to take care of the new suggestion. It cut down on their urgency to speak.
My two children grew up to be fine, upstanding adults. I think they did this in spite of their parents.
Thanks for giving us this example and Demonstrating it so effectively also.
Get this though - people who get tattoos often know that they're in it for the long haul - while some people are idiots and get tattoos while drunk or don't think too hard about it, many more plan their design for years, think long and hard about it, and know full well what they're about to do to their bodies. To suggest those with tattoos make a rash decision and don't think about the consequences is a stupid argument. OP, your kids aren't spectacular for knowing that tattoos are a permanent decision. People who get tattoos also know this. Your kids aren't special.
LOL, your post reminded me of:
JIMMY BUFFETT
"Margaritaville"
Don't know the reason,
Stayed here all season
With nothing to show but this brand new tattoo.
But it's a real beauty,
A Mexican cutie, how it got here
I haven't a clue.
Disclaimer: I don't have a tattoo but I don't care if others have them.
Wait, what exactly was the point of this thread? Has that ever been established?
For those who don't understand the phrase "My Parenting Secret" (and there seems to be a lot of you)
It could be rephrased as
"The Main Thing I Did Right"
Its an observation. I was a single mom, I struggled too. But I struggled way, way less than could be expected - we all Defeated The Statistics. My kids didn't take drugs, didn't stay out at night, didn't have sex too young, didn't enter Adult Relationships too young, stayed at school, did their homework, and in my daughters case got 2 degrees and 3 Scholarships to 3 Drama Schools.
Me sharing WHY I think they became so Independent, Hard Working and so Unscathed even in a high drug use peer environment generally, (after years of reflection) is apparently Pointless - which I find hilariously ironic
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