Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-12-2016, 12:27 AM
 
Location: Long Neck , DE
4,902 posts, read 4,215,035 times
Reputation: 8101

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish Eyes View Post
If parents refuse to correct their children who are doing something directly to you (making rude comments, throwing sand at the beach, touching something that belongs to you) then you are within your rights to say something to the children. But people are nuts so whenever you get into it with someone out in public you do so at your own risk.
There you have it. It the parents won't correct their own kids do so at your own risk.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-12-2016, 03:52 AM
 
Location: Texas Hill Country
23,652 posts, read 13,982,074 times
Reputation: 18856
Probably depends on the situation or at least, one type of situation we might be more likely to become involved in than another.

When I see people mistreating a wild animal, I will tell them to leave it alone. Between the way I dress and my prowess, they usually listen to me.....ie, take me as a Ranger.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 07:08 AM
 
2,441 posts, read 2,607,659 times
Reputation: 4644
Quote:
Originally Posted by brendemu View Post
As a parent, I would want someone to tell my children (the way you did) that their behavior was unacceptable. As their mother, I would have apologized for not noticing and demanded that they apologize to you too. I know that the reaction you got from that mother is all too common, but I fear that she is not instilling kindness and respect in her children.
This. My opinion is that I am happy for others to gently correct my kids, because we're all a village. This goes 1000x for parents of younger children. It really really annoys me when they are passive aggressive and refuse to just say "hey, big kid, please remember to be careful when you run past my toddler" or whatever. They are the adult who is right there, they need to speak up. If they refuse to actually open their mouths and tell a person they are uncomfortable with something, they deserve to be uncomfortable.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 07:44 AM
 
518 posts, read 925,060 times
Reputation: 448
I have no real problem correcting children when they act inappropriately. Like others have said it takes a village. The other parents in my neighborhood also hold this philosophy and it makes us all feel safer. Our block is pretty much a safe zone for kids and all the parents keep an eye out for bad or dangerous behavior. When it happens, we fix the problem be it a skinned knee or someone being mean and then take the kid involved to their house to inform their parent of what happened. I have corrected kids and adults out in public when there actions adversely effected my family. Be it kids running into my family and not saying excuse me or people using overly crude language around my kids. It is all about being respectful when you approach them. I have had a couple parents get a little huffy when I have corrected their children, but I chalk that up to embarrassment for not keeping an eye on their kids.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 08:15 AM
 
33 posts, read 31,666 times
Reputation: 57
Yea thats a tough situation.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 08:33 AM
 
10,196 posts, read 9,882,691 times
Reputation: 24135
Quote:
Originally Posted by TamaraSavannah View Post
Probably depends on the situation or at least, one type of situation we might be more likely to become involved in than another.

When I see people mistreating a wild animal, I will tell them to leave it alone. Between the way I dress and my prowess, they usually listen to me.....ie, take me as a Ranger.
Oh there is a time I can now remember doing it. When we used to go to the zoo a lot (lived close, kids were small) on several occasions I told random kids to stop harassing the animals. I never got a reaction from the parents that I can remember.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Brew City
4,865 posts, read 4,177,358 times
Reputation: 6826
I would have told them they are being rude too.

And as a mother of two little girls, I would hope someone would tell them to stop if they were being rude (of course I would be mortified of their behavior).


I don't live in fear of "upsetting the crazies".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 09:10 AM
 
12,003 posts, read 11,894,188 times
Reputation: 22689
I've frequently stated, "This is not a good place to run" to random kids rampaging through various public places, oblivious to all others. I also make serious eye contact with the offenders when making this neutral observation, so they know they're intended to hear and understand it. Most kids get it and slow down: some even apologize.

Back in the day when I worked with children, I'd do the same, but would sometimes elaborate: running might endanger little children or older people, "and I'm sure you wouldn't want anybody to get hurt by accident". That focussed the attention on the behavior and made it clear I wasn't just being a grouch who didn't like for kids to have fun.

If I encountered rude kids as did the OP, I think I'd make that same serious eye contact and politely inquire, "What did you just say??", or "I beg your pardon?" in a voice likely to be overheard by the parent. The parent did the children no favor by not only defending their rudeness but by also insulting the OP. Those little apples did not drop far...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 02:11 PM
 
1,205 posts, read 1,186,614 times
Reputation: 2631
Ok well good. I really didn't the etiquette on rude behavior from kids. Adults, sure, I've handled that.


I would understand if people have trouble with strangers correcting their youngsters. I did it pretty much without thinking.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-12-2016, 04:54 PM
 
Location: New York NY
5,521 posts, read 8,767,316 times
Reputation: 12718
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
I'm with you OP. There was a time when I would have bitten my lip, but now I've reached the age where I feel I shouldn't have to accept bad behavior. And, honestly, I'm not so old. I've come to the conclusion that we do nobody any favors by staying silent. So, yes, speak up. Let the miscreants(and parents) squirm. It worked back when I was a kid, and if people weren't so worried about backlash, it could work again. I consider objecting to bad behavior a public service.
Rep point to you.

People -- adults and children -- will simply go on doing wrong if nobody calls them on it. So call them on it. And no, you don't scream at the kids or ignore or be disrespectful to their Mom or Dad. But you do let them know straightforwardly and politely that certain behavior is unacceptable. And as to the fear that Mom is crazy and packing heat? Puh-leeze. You have a better chance of being hit by a meteor than getting shot or beaten up for telling some miscreant kid's Mom that her child is out of line.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 05:25 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top