Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
She has complex motor stereotypy, but is highly intelligent and many of her interests are outside typical 7 year old girl interests.
She really is a sweetheart, she is beautiful and has a beautiful personality to match, she is so easy going and never causes any problems. She has a friend and that is about it, but because of her motor issues kids could be put off by that so I think that will be something that we will be dealing with for the long haul.
One can only hope her teacher realized this, and discusses this with the other students...letting them know that she is indeed very special, just like they are, and that we all have special talents...
I have a friend whose child had a concussion...which left here with some pretty serious issues, since she already had anxiety problems...and it amazes me how all the children in her class rallied around her....Makes me tear up with happiness.
My parent guided my choices. And knew when I was heading down the wrong path. She encouraged autonomy with a dash of wisdom.
Thank goodness they cared.
Our one cheerleading coach was evil extraordinaire. I happened to be a gymnast. She made sure I didn't make the team. All the gals were shocked... my mom didn't say one word to the coach. Instead I learned track and field. Come the night of awards... I got several. My mom afterwards looked right at the cheerleading coach and said...oh your gals got one for the team.. my girl got 4! Thank you for getting her to broaden her potential by denying her a place on the squad. And off we went.
I get parents intervening sometimes... I also get how it's important to let kids make those good friendship choices....
There was only one kid my son's were asked not to associate with after the kid boldface lied on a police matter.
I have zero tolerance for that poor character trait.
We definitely have those talks. I make it a point to ask her about her experience at school and with classmates and how she feels about situations. She also knows that if she's uncomfortable with another classmate's behavior to inform a teacher or school administrator. There were a few times last year she was teased for wearing glasses and called a nerd, which she responded with "I know. I like being a nerd." My heart melted. And if the teasing persisted she quickly told a teacher. I explained to her to talk to someone if she ever needs to.
She was chosen by the school counselor to be part of a peer group that teaches other students how to talk and act with compassion and how to express their thoughts and feelings in a positive way. I'm most worried about middle school with her because I know it can be tough being a quirky, nerdy girl in middle school. So we'll continue to have these talks and reiterate that being smart, nerdy or geeky are positive traits and to embrace them.
wishing you the best....
I found being a mom, to be extremely enlightening among many other things, but, isn't it amazing, how much we learn...from them?
This is a particularly interesting article for me today. I fear I may be managing in a different way. My daughter is turning 13, she's in 7th grade in a small private school. For her birthday she wants to have 3 friends over for a sleepover. Normally that would be great but there are only 8 girls total in her class, so that would be half of the girls including her. I suggested she invite everyone and she doesn't want to.
My husband says stay out of it she's in middle school and can manage her own social life. I don't want her to exclude the other girls but I also see his point. Thoughts?
This was really interesting read for me. Recently I was reading up on the Orchid child and the Dandelion child. One of my kids is most definitely an Orchid and I worry about her. She is a 1st grader. She is sensitive and very introverted with other kids and not sure why, quite extroverted with adults. She is the kid who doesnt seem to know how to easily make friends (this came easily to both DH and I as children so we really try to figure out how to help her. Once she's very familiar with the other kids, she's okay but she's the kid that wont force herself into the mix. Last year in Kinder, her best friend who we are good friends with the parents and see each other outside school a lot, had another little girl in their class who decided that the best friend in question (let's call her Amy and the bossy girl, Charly) was going to be her friend and hers alone - my daughter wasnt included. So during recess, they would all go outside, my daughter and Amy would start playing and Charly would join them and pull Amy (she's a sweet, easy going kid) away and say they should go to another side to play a 2 -person game. My daughter would just stand and look at them and be sad and perhaps go play on her own. She didnt seem to know how to go cut in to some other group that was already playing. She would come home and tell me that she's sad and didnt have any friends. Now, this is foriegn to me, I was a really bossy kid:-) so didnt have an issue jumping in the middle of any group but i also was totally okay playing for hours on my own.
We talked with her teacher for pointers and we talked and coached her on making other friends and how to politely join other kids already playing and we also did a whole lot of play dates with kids that she liked who also seemed to want to be her friend already. This year, just a week in at school, she seems to be doing so much better. She comes home every day and tells me she played with a different kid and I'm happy. The sad thing is that so many other kids like her and want to be her friend, by how many stop us in the hallways at drop off to say hi. I know she will be fine but I worry about her mostly because she will care if she's excluded (a few parties in kinder only invited select kids and she came back and told me and she cared). We always tell her that not everyone is going to like you and want to be your friend and its okay.
My other kids dont seem to care about this but also seem to find it incredibly easy to make friends.
This is a particularly interesting article for me today. I fear I may be managing in a different way. My daughter is turning 13, she's in 7th grade in a small private school. For her birthday she wants to have 3 friends over for a sleepover. Normally that would be great but there are only 8 girls total in her class, so that would be half of the girls including her. I suggested she invite everyone and she doesn't want to.
My husband says stay out of it she's in middle school and can manage her own social life. I don't want her to exclude the other girls but I also see his point. Thoughts?
I agree you should stay out of it. She wants to have her friends over - after kindergarten inviting everyone is generally not exclusionary unless she was inviting everyone except one other girl.
This is a particularly interesting article for me today. I fear I may be managing in a different way. My daughter is turning 13, she's in 7th grade in a small private school. For her birthday she wants to have 3 friends over for a sleepover. Normally that would be great but there are only 8 girls total in her class, so that would be half of the girls including her. I suggested she invite everyone and she doesn't want to.
My husband says stay out of it she's in middle school and can manage her own social life. I don't want her to exclude the other girls but I also see his point. Thoughts?
I went to a small private school as well growing up. We had 9 girls in my class. Two other girls and myself were always left out. It really sucked. I don't think I ever was invited to a sleep over my entire school career, I remember I was babysat by a parent of one of the girls in my class, she was invited to this party for the kid in my class, I was not, so while they all played I sat in the car with the younger siblings. I felt so horrible. So sad. I didn't understand at the time why everyone hated me. That being said, I'd rather have not been invited to things, than to be invited and be ignored which happened a lot in my younger years.
I think you are a wonderful and amazing person for wanting everyone to be included and I thank you for that as someone who was not included for many years. I do think your husband is right, she can manage her social life and because she wants to have three friends over and not say seven and to exclude one girl, I think it is alright and everyone will understand: D
I went to a small private school as well growing up. We had 9 girls in my class. Two other girls and myself were always left out. It really sucked. I don't think I ever was invited to a sleep over my entire school career, I remember I was babysat by a parent of one of the girls in my class, she was invited to this party for the kid in my class, I was not, so while they all played I sat in the car with the younger siblings. I felt so horrible. So sad. I didn't understand at the time why everyone hated me. That being said, I'd rather have not been invited to things, than to be invited and be ignored which happened a lot in my younger years.
I think you are a wonderful and amazing person for wanting everyone to be included and I thank you for that as someone who was not included for many years. I do think your husband is right, she can manage her social life and because she wants to have three friends over and not say seven and to exclude one girl, I think it is alright and everyone will understand: D
Totally agree. I think I would rather my kids not be invited than be invited and ignored.
This is a particularly interesting article for me today. I fear I may be managing in a different way. My daughter is turning 13, she's in 7th grade in a small private school. For her birthday she wants to have 3 friends over for a sleepover. Normally that would be great but there are only 8 girls total in her class, so that would be half of the girls including her. I suggested she invite everyone and she doesn't want to.
My husband says stay out of it she's in middle school and can manage her own social life. I don't want her to exclude the other girls but I also see his point. Thoughts?
I would agree with your husband. Trust your daughter's choices and support them. In my experience, parents who second guess their kid's decisions and insist they change them tend to end up with kids who always look to them for approval instead of trusting their own judgment.
Thanks all, I think we will stay out of it. The class kind of divides down the middle with each group of four girls hanging out together so it isn't as if my daughter is invited to everything anyway or that the other girls are always left out.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
