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Old 02-06-2017, 11:41 PM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam View Post
True Crime shows are tales of real life crimes.

But they're not representative of stuff that happens normally.

They pick the most extreme examples that get good ratings, but that doesn't mean it happens very often.

 
Old 02-06-2017, 11:43 PM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marlow View Post
Your posts make me wonder if you have been the adult in a relationship with a minor.

I'm not trying to insult you, but you started posting on C-D in the last week and seem consumed with this thread.


I am not her, but I do have friends who are minors of the opposite gender and there is nothing wrong with it.

If the forum wasn't so paranoid, I wouldn't have to be "consumed" by it, but the regular posters all seem like helicopter parents.

I hope the 1st poster eventually sees the holes in these poster's arguments with enough persistence.

There is no price too heavy to pay for justice.
 
Old 02-06-2017, 11:58 PM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by SOON2BNSURPRISE View Post
An 18 year old is supposed to be considered an adult. At 18 they can make decisions that a 16 year old can not make. A 16 year old is a minor and can not make the same decisions. As a parent I can control who my kids spend time with. Since a 16 year old is a kid then they fit the mold. An 18 year old can legally live on their own. As a parent I can still control what happens in my own home, even if that kid is now 25. Parents reach is limited to what happens in the home, especially since a 25 year old or an 18 year old could leave if they chose to. A 16 year old does not have the same freedom of movement.

An example: We do not allow our kids to smoke, drink, take drugs, or even watch movies that are R rated or anything worse and in today's world we even watch the PG movies. Our kids friends know the rules and follow them in our home.

A couple boys were spending the night. One of them is close the other was new. The new kid brought some R rated movies with him to our home and figured that they would watch them in our sons room.

The kid that we knew told new kid that they could not watch R rated moves in our home. New kid said no one would know because they were in the room. The kid we know explained to new kid that our son would not go along with it and that we as parents would more than likely stop by to check on things during the evening.

They never did watch those Rated R movies. LOL.

Another time when one of our sons was a Senior in high school, he called to ask me to pick him up. He was at a Birthday party and the dad of the girl whose party it was, went to the kitchen and was making drinks for the teens at the party. Our son felt uncomfortable around a parent that would get the teen's drinks. Not only is that bad parenting but in our area a parent can get arrested for supplying alcohol to minors.

That didn't answer my question. I asked what specific decisions is a 16-year mentally incapable of understanding that an 18-year old can understand?

All you did was restate the question.

You can claim you control who your kids spend time with, but they could easily sneak out or see them on their way home from school and you would never know the difference.

You act as if there is a physical barrier that stops a 16-year old from going somewhere if you do not want them to. What are you going to do? Call the cops every time he sneaks out? If you abuse that idea, you will turn into the "boy who cries wolf."


How old are your kids? If your kid is 16, he's old enough to watch an R rated movie.

I don't think kids should smoke, drink, or take drugs either, but I know you can't really stop the drinking.

The R-rated movie ban is way over the top though. You are being WAY too paranoid. Assuming he is 16, you check in on what he is watching? If you let him dorm for college, you're creating a HUGE problem. He is not going to be able to handle the lack of supervision.

Why would your son feel uncomfortable if the parent got the teen drinks, but not if the kids got their own drinks? That makes no sense.
 
Old 02-06-2017, 11:59 PM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilide View Post
Sounds like this was handled very well! Thanks for keeping us posted.

The best solution I could think of was for your son to realize it was inappropriate and cut off the relationship himself. It shows he is becoming a mature adult. Kudos to him!

We still haven't heard why it was inappropriate!

Something isn't inappropriate just because the parent doesn't like it.

Also, the woman was entitled to a more detailed explanation on why he was cutting it off than just "I'm 16."
 
Old 02-07-2017, 12:02 AM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by tottsieanna View Post
Good for you! This is a prime example of parents needing to be parent. A lot of times young people gets into situations that they do not know how to handle to deal with or get out of. You did the right thing in discussing this with your son.

There's no reason why the mom should have been involved.

IF he actually did not want to be friends anymore, he should be able to just explain why to the woman.

If he cannot put a sentence together, he is nowhere near 16 years old in maturity. More like a 10 year old.
 
Old 02-07-2017, 12:09 AM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by hunterseat View Post
I'd report her just to see if it really is illegal. Probably not depending on the age of consent.
The fact he told you is such a positive. Don't alienate him. (I probably need to read all bazillion pages of this thread)
I bet she is pressuring him and he doesn't want to be mean, plus it feeds his ego.
Tough situation. She's not all there. I'd have to restrict the phone use at night, for sure. Sleep is healthy for him. That wench is not.
I just read up a few posts and see you've got a handle on it. Good.



What evidence do you have that she is pressuring him or that she is not all there?

And not telling someone you are upset and ditching them is FAR meaner than just being up front with how you feel.
 
Old 02-07-2017, 12:11 AM
 
160 posts, read 83,609 times
Reputation: 49
Quote:
Originally Posted by hunterseat View Post
I want to add, my son was a bit older than yours and became involved with a woman who had sons his age. Creepy but he was out of the house and I had to keep the peace or lose contact with him. It was scary.


How did that relationship work out?

But why was it scary?
 
Old 02-07-2017, 05:30 AM
 
2,661 posts, read 2,216,047 times
Reputation: 4999
Quote:
Originally Posted by Book Lover 21 View Post
A few weeks ago our son casually mentioned that he has been chatting with a 40 year old woman online. .

No 40 year old woman in her right mind would chat like this with a minor online. Automatic suspicion. And I'd be half-willing to bet it's a man borrowing somebody's identity.
 
Old 02-07-2017, 06:01 AM
 
28,164 posts, read 25,203,821 times
Reputation: 16664
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
I would call the woman and have a frank talk with her. TODAY.
This! OMG. I'm nearly 40 and can't imagine calling some random teen in the middle of the night and conversing with him for 5 hours! What are people thinking?
 
Old 02-07-2017, 07:32 AM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
11,583 posts, read 6,690,770 times
Reputation: 14786
Quote:
Originally Posted by emerald2 View Post
We still haven't heard why it was inappropriate!

Something isn't inappropriate just because the parent doesn't like it.

Also, the woman was entitled to a more detailed explanation on why he was cutting it off than just "I'm 16."


WHY was it inappropriate?? HE'S A MINOR, DUH! He was sneaking around talking to this woman so there was obviously something going on that shouldn't been. And that woman needs NO explanation on why it needs to end except for the fact that she was speaking with a minor and the parent want's it to stop. PERIOD!


I'm assuming you don't have MINOR children??
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