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For me, by my late 20's I believed abstractly that having children was something that I would do. But it took the confrontation of my own mortality, with my parents' deaths and a couple of unexpected health problems cropping up for me, that lit the fire under the proverbial butt. Being a father has changed literally everything, and I never suspected the depths of joy, contentment, and fierce responsibility.
Make sure you're relationship is going towards marriage or at least one that you're sure is life long. Parenting no matter what means you will be a part of one anthers life for life. To add to that, make sure you share the same parenting beliefs. This is super important.
I say get a career & get a few years under your belt. That way you can hop out of work for a few years if you wanted and have a place to jump back into the game. Otherwise, it can be difficult and relying on your husbands income will only add stress to the relationship. Kids are crazy expensive so be ready to give up the extra money to do this & that and be sure you are financially comfortable going in. Do it right if you want you kid to have the best you can provide.
35 for a guy especially is NOT old. Tell him to chill. Your relationship will grow stronger the longer you all are together without kids. Thats when you have the most time to learn about one another throughout time & enjoy one another. Savior it. It will come in handy when your stressed as parents.
I just had a kid and am effing miserable and hate it. I hate myself for getting into this.
I can write a whole manifesto on it and the related issues, but for now, will refrain.
After I had my first son I used to sit alone with him during the day and not know what was expected of me when he didnt need fed or changed.. although I like children I wondered what being a parent was really about. maybe we should be taught in school what to expect, small babies I dont get at all, much prefer them when I can talk to them and get a smile... but dont think at 20 I was ready to be a mother ... and never ever got broody as they say... to have one..
Do not wait until your 40, there is already plenty of women at the ivf clinic already.
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